Breaking the rule
by lorcris
Summary: A Danny centered story. When Rafie ask for help to his brother, Danny struggles between break his main protective rule or keep it. Enjoy Danny and Martin friendship, enjoy Jack, Sam and Vivian little stories and meet other interesting characters I've created for this story. English version of "Rompiendo la regla".
1. Chapter 1

BREAKING THE RULE

Chapter 1

**New York, December 2004**

Adjusting his coat, Danny Taylor buried his cold hands in his pockets. It had been long ago since he'd arrived in New York and the city had adopted him, but he wasn't used to the low temperatures in early December.

A quick glance at his watch was enough to make Danny realize that he would arrive at work on time. He would arrive on time and no one would ask any questions. Danny began walking towards the bus that was provided by the Department of Corrections, for visitors to and from the Island. He tried to repress any thoughts about the events that had transpired in Rikers during his hour and a half long conversation with his brother. That, however, was going to be very difficult until he was safely on the other side of Buono's bridge, which led him to his home in Queens and far away from Rikers Island, the largest penitentiary in New York City and his brother Rafael Alvarez's home.

A grimace of disgust crossed Danny's face, reigniting the resentment that he felt when he had any contact with his brother Rafael or Rafi as he was well known; the confusion Danny felt every single time he talked to Rafael, every time he was forced to remember who he actually was. It didn't matter that he'd lived a difficult life, changed his name, sobered up and built a life for himself that anyone would be proud of. Every time that he talked to Rafi, all of his self-confidence, self-worth, his hard work and accomplishments would come crashing down. Danny was forced to relive the reality that was his life all of those years ago. They were years of fear, frustration, solitude and rage that he'd more than once tried to forget with a generous amount of alcohol; a habit that he had given up with effort and the help of a great friend, Raymond Coleman, his sponsor from Alcoholics Anonymous.

Danny was aware that he'd lived a life that had taught him a lot of lessons along the way. He knew that he should be grateful and proud of the amazing young man he'd turned into, despite his difficult life before. However, to Danny Taylor, there was only handful of memories of his thirty-one years on this Earth which were worthy of attention. As for all the others, he tried...pretended that those damn event and memories in his past life hadn't existed.

That was Danny's sole intention, when he shook hands with the city official who gave him the documents that contained his new surname, new social security number and his new life.

_Flashback…_

_Fidgety, Danny shifted on the seat as the employee at the other side of the desk revised, ordered, signed and sealed the required documents, a task that seemed never-ending.__Nervously, Danny began to fear that there was a problem with the documents he'd turned over to the official, surely that had to be the reason he was taking so long. _

_When the city official finally gave him his new documents, Danny took them with trembling hands, as if they were crystal, as he was going to break them. Closing his eyes, standing there, he swore to himself that he was going to start fresh and forget everything he had lived before._

_Only the sound of throats clearing, courtesy of the people waiting behind him in line, made Danny react. He opened his eyes, and vigorously shaking the hand of the official, so used to seeing and hearing those empty kinds of promises from people who crashed and burned less than a month later before throwing their lives away again. Before leaving the office, Danny breathed in a new air, filled with self-confidence and determination to make a new life for himself._

"_Don't look back," was Danny's number one rule. "Danny Taylor, Danny Taylor, Danny Taylor…" Danny began whispering that name again and again, making it his new name and his new life. He would never be Danny Alvarez again._

_End of Flashback_

Several passengers got into the bus a few seconds before the driver started the engine and greeted him kindly. They were probably staff members from the night shift, since it was still too early and visitors weren't allowed into the prison yet. Danny had made use of his credentials as an FBI agent to get special permission to see his brother before the usual visitor's time. Rafi didn't protest when the guard came to escort him away and he's had to miss breakfast. He was really anxious and all he wanted was to talk to his little brother Danny.

Danny absentmindedly greeted back and focused his attention straight forward, feeling better as the bus drove away from Rikers Island. However, he feared that his recent conversation with Rafi would leave him troubled for quite a while.

What to do? He could let it go. That was Danny's first thought but, on the other hand, he couldn't help but feel curious. Maybe he could try to investigate it and Rafi wouldn't bother him anymore. Danny was almost certain that everything that Rafi had told him during his visit was a result of his brother's imagination, a mind deteriorated by the long years of drug abuse and the countless years spent going in and out of prison.

For the last twenty years, both brothers had rarely seen each other. However, two crucial encounters had changed Danny's life, forcing him to confront the painful events and putting his emotional stability in jeopardy. Danny was aware of how close he was to succumbing to the pressures of unresolved situations if he didn't keep away the memories of his past. But Danny also knew that although it was a constant fear, sooner or later, he would have to confront his past.

Behind the bars that separated him from the outside world, Rafi observed his brother as he left walking through the corridor, beside the guard. He was expecting a confirmation, an understanding look, a final positive glance before Danny turned the corridor and he lost sight of his brother; however, his brother never once looked back.

Losing heart, Rafael Alvarez shook his head in disbelief and turned back. He didn't tell his brother the whole story; it hurt him to make his little brother suffer. All it took was one look at Danny's expression to easily take him back to the past. Their current relationship was anchored to the past, to a life that, in Rafi's opinion, was enough justification for his current situation; an opinion that Danny completely refuted. Danny was probably right, Rafi knew that as well, but still…things would have been very different if their father wouldn't have been the bastard that he was, different for him and different for Danny.

Despite missing out on most of Danny's life, Rafi was proud of him. No doubt Danny was a strong man and He had successfully passed all the tests that life had put him through…including the fact that Rafi had failed in being the older protective brother he needed most after his parents' death.

Rafi tried to remember the last time they were together, the day of their ultimate separation. Before him stood a tall, thin little boy, with dark hair and a deep look, eager for life experiences and knowledge, caresses, the warmth of home, a family. The boy wanted someone who could hear his whispered pleas. Rafi wasn't able to give Danny what he was looking for, since he was looking for the exact same thing. He didn't find anything in that moment, though. The memories that came to mind were memories of the happy times they used to have when he and Danny went fishing or when he was teaching Danny how to drive. Rafi, eight years older than Danny, had a car that he was proud to show off and he remembered well how happily Danny's face lit up when Rafi taught him how to drive the Lincoln Continental. Yeah, it wasn't that bad, then.

The sound of keys opening the cell where he had met with his brother minutes earlier, brought Rafi back now from those joyful memories from his past, beside the sea, in Miami. Once again, he was brought back to the present day and all that surrounded him were the grey walls, the failing fluorescent light and the bars and guards everywhere. Prison, a constant reminder of the poor choices he'd made his entire life. That was Rafael Alvarez' life, going in and out of prison, just because he had screwed things up every chance he got, even now when he had his own family. What was he thinking? When would he learn the rules of the game? How the hell was he going to compensate his wife, Sylvia, for all the years he had spent in prison promising her that everything would be different once he got out, just to do the same thing he'd done in the past? How was he going to make things up to Nicky, who in his eleven years of life had only seen his father outside of these prison walls for one year and a half? What about his daughter Natalie, who was still unaware of the fact her father was a convict? There was no time anymore, his time had come to an end, he thought regretfully and was surprised by tears that shed from his eyes.

"Come on, Alvarez. You've already had an extra visit allowed this week even though it wasn't the allowed time or day." He listened to the guardian. Absentmindedly, Rafi offered his hands to the guard and was handcuffed. They left through the opposite door from the one that had been opened to allow his brother to leave and wearily walked toward his cell, keeping with him the memory of a smiling ten year old Danny trying to get the pedals of the Lincoln Continental… the car whose doors were full of hidden drugs.

**Miami, March 1980**

"… and match the horse's picture to its name. Like this. Danny, pay attention!" Janice Ayala dropped the pencil and glanced concerned toward the six year old little boy. His brilliant dark eyes were glued to the door, where on the side his parents were having a violent argument. It wasn't a big deal in their house, but they were talking about him and Danny was plenty aware about what was going to happen later…when there were no witnesses.

"Danny, honey, come on…" She insisted, soothing his arm. Danny jumped slightly and focused his eyes on Janice. His expression of fear was so clear and Danny was on the verge of tears. However, he took the pencil with courage and drew the line that matched the horse figure with the word defining it, swallowing the tears and the fear that threatened to come a minute earlier.

"Is your hand still hurting?" She asked, pointing to his left bandaged wrist.

The kid shook his head.

"Of course it still hurts," His older brother replied. "But that'll teach him to stay quiet and not get in the middle when Papi…"

"I cut myself with the window!" The kid protested angrily.

Both brothers looked each other defiantly. Rafi, at fourteen had become a lanky dark-haired teenager. His expression showed clearly that his childhood had been taken away and he'd been forced to grow up at an early age, probably earlier than other kids his age, who were still enjoying his childhood.

Finally, Rafi averted his eyes and closed the books with scorn. "I'm going out for a walk," He announced, standing up.

"Rafael, please seat down. You haven't finished your homework yet." Janice ordered.

"Says who?" He replied.

She was going to object, but Rafi was already leaving, carefully closing the door. He didn't want his parents to stop yelling and insulting each other and focus their anger and insults toward him or Danny.

Playing with a small stone, as he walked toward the parking lot of the old abandoned Civic Centre, where he met his friends every day, Rafi once again thought about the chance of leaving home. But he needed money and he didn't want to think about leaving Danny behind. What would happen to his little brother if he left? Day after day, under silence, Rafi succumbed to his father's rage and was beaten both for whatever he had done but also for what Danny would deserve, according to the rules his drunken father commanded. They were rules that on some days, Danny and his mom appeared to accept in order to keep his father from beating them. Rafi was aware of what was behind Danny's reaction. He had been separated from his mom once before and spending an evening in a foster home, not knowing what would happen the next morning, had resulted terrifying for the kid. It wasn't easy for his mom, either. It was difficult to create a lot of excuses to try to hide the abuse. She wouldn't be able to deal with being separated from her sons again. So, she had repeatedly told Danny, with great conviction, that he'd cut his wrist himself with a broken kitchen window. His mother said it so many times that the kid had begun to accept that excuse. A grimace of disgust appeared on his face as he continued, already forgetting the small stone that had accompanied him during his first steps toward the parking lot.

Even when he'd left their small house, he could still hear in his head the screams and insults his parents yelled at each other. They lived in that small house in Hialeah, an unfavorable and run down neighborhood in Miami. He was still thinking about that, when he spotted his friends leaning against an old abandoned car that sat by the fence in the parking lot, speaking friendly. He waved at his friend and walked faster.

"Hey! What's up?" Rafi greeted as they shook hands in the usual ritual they called a 'greeting'.

"Hi Rafi," One of them replied, handing him a cigarette.

Rafi smiled in surprise. "Where did you get this, _Verguilla_?" That was the nickname they used for Marcos Zaldívar, who at fifteen was taller than his friends, even though Rafi was almost as tall as him.

_Verguilla _burst out laughing, revealing several missing teeth; a consequence of being punched in the mouth during a fight the previous month. "Do you remember the guy that I talked to you about last Friday?" Rafi nodded as he lit the cigarette and took several puffs, as if he was an expert in the matter. He'd stopped coughing and choking on the cigarette smoke long ago and felt that it was a big deal, very important; especially, when he still saw a lot of boys who'd turn red in the face and ears and cough nonstop after trying to smoke.

"He's got a business proposition for us…it seems interesting," _Verguilla _continued.

"Is about money or just cigarettes?" Rafi asked intrigued.

"He said that we'd become important people…" Manny commented.

Manny, Manuel Ramirez, was fifteen years old just like _Verguilla_ and he was Verguilla's counterpart. Manuel was just as short as his father or so he was told. Manny never met his so-called father, the man who'd lived in his house for a short time and left, leaving his mom to pay a large debt and three children to fend for, all on her own. His mother spent her life washing other people's dirty dishes in a restaurant during the day and looking after her family on what little time she had free. Manny, the oldest of three brothers, was supposed to care for the little ones, but the truth was that he spent most of the time with _Verguilla _and Rafi. The further away from home he was, the better, he had decided.

The sound of loud shrilling music coming from an approaching car, made them look at it. Rafi frowned thoughtful, trying to remember where he had seen that car before. Oh yeah, close to the jetty where he sometimes took Danny. "Are they the business men?" he asked, already knowing the answer to his question.

_Verguilla _nodded nervously as he continued staring at the car.

The music was turned off and the doors were opened. Two large men approximately twenty-six or twenty-seven years old, Rafi thought, got out and began glancing around as they approached the group, pointing at _Verguilla_. Rafi couldn't help but smile at the outfit that the guys wore, surely they'd been inspired by a terrible mob movie.

"What's so funny? What are you smiling about?" One of the men blurted out.

Rafi's smile froze instantly, but used to the daily struggle with his father, he found a quick answer, albeit a true one. "Your car…" He began, while the man raised an eyebrow. "I like it," Rafi continued, uncertain about the man's reaction and whether or not he would be offended.

"Okay, so you like it, huh? Would you like to drive a car like this one?" The guy asked smiling mischievously.

Rafi wasn't able to hide his pleasure, even though he simply just nodded. "It'd be good," He concluded. He wasn't of legal age though, but he was tall enough that he could pretend to be sixteen years old, the required age to get his license.

"Have you talked to your friends, kid?" The man asked _Verguilla._

"I told them what you told me, that you had an interesting business proposition for us," The kid replied.

"You could make some money…and some goods, if you want," He said as he threw the cigarette on the ground and crushed it with the tip of his steel-toed shoes. "Come here."

**Miami, September 1980**

Rafi quickly climbed the stairs to the third floor of the old building, stopping to catch his breath just few steps from the door to his home. He had to control his breathing and bring it back to normal. He'd never seen so much money before and had spent some of it on gifts for his mom, his brother and he still had some money left over. It's for her, as well, he thought. He'd heard his mother talking about things that she needed for the home but his father always refused to give her anything. Well, things were going to be different now.

Feeling proud and responsible for his family, confident about the changes that were coming beginning now, he took the bags and knocked on the door. The silence on the other side of the door told him that his dad wasn't around.

"¡Abuela!" (_Grandma!) _Rafi exclaimed in surprise as she opened the door.

Apart from any social worker coming by for an inspection, having visitors wasn't a usual occurrence at home.

She looked at him up and down and frowned. "These kids are growing so much. I don't know how you do it, Sonia. None of my kids were ever this tall!" She exclaimed in Spanish, the only language she spoke; speaking loudly so that her daughter would hear it.

Rafi dropped the bags and hugged his grandma. At sixty-five years old, María Auxiliadora Quirós didn't keep her courage anymore. Leaving from Cuba, after the death of her husband, with her little daughter, Sonia, they had established in Miami where she had gotten a job in a men's clothing store. A job she shared with her daughter, Sonia, until the day she fell in love with a client's son, Mario Alvarez, although attractive, appeared somewhat dangerous in her opinion.

Not only did his attractiveness called the attention of Sonia, but the sweet way in which he helped his mother, to take the clothes she couldn't mend after the arthritis had ruined her hands.

He loved her green eyes that highlighted her pale face. As she put her long dark hair in a ponytail, Mario Alvarez knew for certain that he had found the mother of his children. Three years after they had left Cuba, Sonia and Mario joined their lives with promises and dreams soon forgotten under Sonia's tears. It was after Rafael's birth that things at home took a drastic turn. Mario spent more time outside of his home than in it, he barely helped his wife and on more than one occasion the alcoholic breath and glassy eyes was the only attention she got from him once he returned home.

In the beginning she thought that she would be able to deal with the situation, but after his behavior began affecting his job as a mechanic, he became more and more violent, especially with his family. A short time later, there was nothing left of the attractive young man helping his mother, that she had first been attracted to.

Looking after the basic necessities of her family Sonia considered the possibility of working in the clothing store making alterations, a job which she had abandoned when she got married. Then, it wasn't necessary and moreover, Mario wasn't happy about her working at all, but now things were different. If Mario wasn't able to keep a job, she wanted to do something. But he didn't understand the need and he took her wanting to work as an offense. His violent reaction made her give up the option of asking him again.

Sonia's mother couldn't help when an enraged Mario came into the store to confront her. The situation hadn't gone worse than his uncontrolled yelling, thanks to a young female employee who intervened. It was María Auxiliadora who called social services, talked to the teachers at school and discretely tried to help her daughter and grandsons from that moment on. She barely went to the house because she was afraid of running into Mario and when she did go to her daughter's house, she always tried to make sure that he wasn't around.

Rafi put a finger on his lips with a conspiratorial smile, when his grandma stared at the bags. Then, he approached the sleepy figure of his little brother sleeping on the couch. Tapping on his shoulder, he sat down beside Danny. Whispering something to his ear, the kid began shifting on the couch. Then, Rafi stood up and taking one of the bags, he took out a colored wrapped gift and set it beside him.

Danny rubbed his eyes and looked at his brother protesting, but immediately focused on the gift and woke up all of a sudden, no longer feeling sleepy. "What's this? Is it for me?" He exclaimed, opening his eyes widely.

"Open it," His brother encouraged him.

Danny took the gift and quickly tore up the paper. The small backpack with Looney Tunes printed on it, made his kid brother's eyes light brilliantly in happiness. Opening it, he looked inside and turned it to examine all of the details. Finally, he looked at his older brother, his face illuminated with a big smile.

"What do you have to say, Danny?" his grandma asked.

"Thanks Rafi," he replied instantly.

Rafi laughed and hugged his little brother. "That's okay. It's cool, right? Wait until you see the faces of your classmates when you arrive at school tomorrow."

They both burst into laughter. Rafi mussed up his brother's dark hair and then stood up. "Wait, I've got something for mom, as well," He said without realizing that she was leaning against the bedroom door, observing him with a smile but also a worried look.

However, turning to her, Rafi didn't understand the concern. His mom barely smiled with her eyes, which, most of the time was a mirror of fear and fixed on her, the sadness of her soul. Rafi guessed the reason but they never talked about it. Sometimes he had overheard a social worker warning his father "…_if you continue like this, and the current circumstances continue, the situation will become more difficult. You must understand that if they got into the program was because social services' reports were positives about you and you signed an agreement that you have to obey." _He had noticed the scorn expression of his father and the tears in the eyes of his mom that day and looking through the crack of the bedroom door he shared with Danny, had seen her holding Danny's hand, feared that, at any moment, he would be taken to a group home.

"What's this all about, Rafi?" She asked, taking the bag that he handed her. He didn't reply, just looked at her expectantly as she took out the soft sea green sweater that matched the color of her eyes. She couldn't help but exclaim "Rafi, this is wonderful!" She put on the sweater and approached the mirror. "Look mom, isn't it beautiful? And you've got the exact size. Good eye…"

"There's something else, mom," Rafi said joyfully, as he began fishing in his pocket and found the small roll of money. "Take it, this is… for you, for home, for… whatever you need."

She looked at the money astonished. She didn't have to wonder how much there was because it was too much money for a fifteen year old kid to have, and then there were the gifts. Staring at her older smiling son, a terrible thought crossed her mind.

"Rafi, honey, where did you get this money from?" His mother asked.

"Don't worry mom. I've worked hard to get it…," He began.

"Doing what?" his grandma asked then, understanding Sonia's worry.

"Rafi, are you in trouble? Listen son, I'm happy that you got all of this but... I don't want you to do anything that is going to get you in trouble. This is all right, but it's not necessary, do you understand?" His mother had stopped smiling and now both she and his grandma looked at him with a concerning look that Rafi would have liked to erase in that instant.

"I'm not in trouble. Some guys offered a job to _Verguilla _and Manny and I joined them. We just have to take something from one place to another…" he explained.

"Something," his grandma repeated thoughtfully. "It must be something very important to get so much money for taking it from one place to another."

Rafi swallowed hard and glanced at Danny, absent from the situation, still looking at the Looney Tunes backpack that his brother had given him. "I don't know what it's about," he finally said.

"And, who are those guys, Rafi?" His mother asked again.

"I don't really know…"

"Don't they have names?"

"Actually, we talked to one of them. We called him 'Mr. Guzmán'. I don't know anything else."

His mom's face paled. It had to be Alexis Guzmán. She had heard of him and what people said about him was nothing good. Taking Danny's backpack and the sweater, she put them in the bags and handed them back to Rafi, as well as the money. "Give this back… or give it away… or do whatever you want. I'm not going to accept it knowing where it's coming from," She ordered very seriously.

"But mom, it's mine. I'm giving it to you. I earned it. It's my job," Rafi protested in confusion.

"I don't want you to work for that Guzmán. I don't want you to do those jobs, Rafi. We don't need that money…"

"What?! We need it! What does Papi bring you from his job, huh? We live badly in this old house, with barely the basics…"

"No Rafi, we don't live badly. Our problems have nothing to do with money; we've got enough money to live!"

"That's a lie! I've heard you both yelling at each other because Papi doesn't give you money for food! I've heard you arguing to get some money for school things! You always are yelling each other about money!" It was Rafi who was yelling now.

His mom saw the rage in Rafi's eyes, it was familiar and just as painful. For a second, she thought that the teenager yelling at her was Mario. But no, he was Rafi, her little boy who wasn't little anymore. At the moment, her son vanished, replace with an unrecognizable stranger. A cold shiver ran down her spine in anticipation…a premonition of her older son's dark future, if she didn't do something to change it.

"Rafi," She began calmly. "These guys are bad people, drug traffickers. They're only using you to make their drug deals and so that the police won't catch them. If they catch you, son, if they catch you…you'll be in serious trouble and there'll no way to help you. I don't want you to ruin your life. You have to get away from them, do you understand me? The best gift that you can give me is to finish high school and get a decent job, but not this. It looks good, it's an easy way to make money but it's bad and it's dangerous."

"Honey, all of this that you've bought is dirty…" His grandma began.

"Dirty? What's dirty? It's mine, I got it, I got it for you. Grandma, where do you see anything dirty here?" Rafi insisted, removing the sweater he had bought for his mom.

"Rafi, your mom is grateful for what you've brought. The problem is how you got it. Where that money comes from is the issue here," His grandma tried to explain.

"No, that's not wrong. What's wrong is something else. It's what happens here which we don't talk about, what happens before the social workers get here and when they are here. It's all of the lies, every single time we end up in an emergency room at the hospital. Don't you realize that we can be free with this money?"

"Rafi don't waste your life like this," his mother replied, aware that there was some truth in Rafi's words but…what could she do?

"No, I won't waste it. If you want to live like this, go ahead, mom. But don't expect me to do the same." Rafi took the bags and the money and turned away, running quickly out the house. He wouldn't let them see his tears of rage and desperation, of frustration. He didn't want to see Danny, misunderstanding what had happened between them and wondering what had happened to his new backpack.

He walked back the route he had been walking just minutes before when he felt the joy of bringing good things home. He finally had to force himself to stop thinking about the memories of what had just happened. Rafi hit his fist on a wall and left a small hole in it and blood on his fists but he didn't care.

After angrily wiping away his tears, Rafi walked down the street, to the place where he usually went to meet with _Verguilla _and Manny. He'd share a joint with them and forget everything for a while.

**Miami, February 1983**

Although he didn't have to go to school, Danny got up early that day. He had agreed to meet Rafi for fishing and spending the day out together. Still sleepy and dressed in his pajamas, he walked into the kitchen and dropped himself onto a chair. On the table still lay the note that Andy Pears, the social worker, had left him the day before. Of all the social workers that had come to the house, Andy had been his favorite. But just like all of the other social workers, Andy too had given up.

"I thought he liked me," he said.

His mom, who was making him something to eat for lunch, closed the container and put it into the bag. Then, she handed a cup of hot milk to him and sat down beside him. "I just called social services. Andy quit his job…not us, not you. Sometimes people just get tired or find a better job…"

"I thought he had fun with me," The kid continued.

"Of course he did, sweetie, but his job is more complicated than that," She said, bringing the cookies closer.

"Then, this isn't it about me?"

"Of course, it's not…"

"I don't get it. Why did he tell me about summer camp if he wasn't going to take me at all?"

"Maybe he had planned on taking you, Danny. But, surely something came up and…"

"They all leave," he interrupted. "They make plans with me, but then just go away. I guess they say it so I'll believe them, but it's a lie… it's always a lie. I'm stupid for believing them."

"No, baby, it's not a lie. This has nothing to do with you. And no, of course you're not stupid. You're so smart, my little baby. And your tutor at school agrees with me."

"Papi doesn't."

"Your father is so busy, Danny and sometimes he just brings his problems home. That's why he's so angry but it's not about you. He loves you…in his way… but he loves you."

Danny stared at her skeptically, while he thought of another question. But his mom didn't let him talk anymore.

"Drink your milk. Your brother will be here any moment," She said. "I've prepared your backpack with some clothes and lunch. Have you got the fishing rods?"

"Rafi has them."

"Okay, I'm going to take a shower. If he comes up, tell him not to leave. I want to talk to him," She ordered.

"Why's Rafi away for so long, Mami? I liked it better when we all lived together."

"I don't know; he's already grown up but I would like him to be here as well," she replied.

Sonia Álvarez stayed looking at Danny for a moment. He looked so innocent, maybe he was used to the situation… maybe he ignored it, as she did. But Rafi… Rafi couldn't live a second with his father without fighting. And there were too many arguments in that house as it was. Sonia was aware that her son was still working for the drug dealers and silently prayed for him to be safe. Rafi was already an adult and there was nothing she could do for him.

Some minutes later, Danny opened the door for his brother. "Is Papi here?" Rafi asked immediately. Danny nodded.

"He's sleeping, I think he came back late from work last night…" he explained.

"From work?" Rafi repeated in a mocking tone. "Sure," he continued. He wouldn't have an argument with his brother; maybe it'd be better for him. "You ready?"

"Yep. Mami says that she wants to talk to you."

Rafi grimaced in disgust and then he remembered something. "Look, look down through the window," He said, heading to the only window in the little living room. Opening the window, Rafi pointed down. Danny looked down to see the car that Rafi was pointing to. "Is…is that the Lincoln Continental you told me about?" He asked with wide eyes.

"That's the one," his brother said. "Don't tell Mami. I'll take you fishing and later we'll give it back. It's not mine, of course."

"It's great!"

"If you want, I can teach you to drive, when we're close to the jetty."

"Would you do that?" Danny asked, still in surprise, his eyes glued to the car.

"Sure, anything for my little bro," Rafi replied. "But you know, to be quiet about it, right?"

"Rafi, are you there?" They heard Sonia asking.

"Yes, Mami… we're leaving…" Rafi replied.

She showed up in the still opened living room and closed the window quickly. "Look, come here. I've prepared some things for you," she explained handing him a backpack. "Take it, there's some food for lunch and I've baked a cake for you…" she stopped, not knowing how to continue. She missed her son terribly and she was so worried about the life he was living. "You're so tiny," she trailed off.

Rafi felt the knot in his throat. He loved his mother, but he didn't understand the way she lived giving in to his father, why she hadn't done anything. However, he lived on his own, taking care of his little brother though, trying to keep him away from his father's cruelty. They said things were working out, but he knew it was a lie. Social workers were still there and the unmentionable ones hadn't come back. There were other signs, though. The marks on Danny's arms were too much evident and Rafi had stopped questioning his little brother, in desperation from the excuses that Danny made up.

"It smells good, mom. Thanks. I'll bring Danny back at sunset, right?" He said taking the bag. Kissing his mom, he grabbed Danny's hand, and then looked at his brother with an indescribable smile.

Their mom continued looking at them, wondering why Danny was so happy about spending time with his brother… sure the little kid had in mind a new incentive apart from fishing…the Lincoln Continental parked outside.

"And… what I have to do?" He asked.

It had been a while since they had abandoned the fishing and Danny became more interested in the car.

"Don't you remember what I taught you last time?" Rafi protested.

It was the second time Rafi got the Lincoln Continental for a job and Danny wanted to drive it again. However, Rafi was worried. The people he worked for began taking an interest in Danny and Rafi didn't feel good about that. He loved his brother. He took Danny with him to keep the kid away his father, but he didn't want him to join those people… him. With a sweater covering his arms, hiding the last needle tracks of drugs from the boy, he leaned his hand on the gearshift to explain, once again, how it worked, as Danny tried hard to reach the pedals. As he was teaching him, Rafi decided it would be the last time he took Danny with him. It was dangerous. Danny started to realize what was happening and Rafi didn't want to risk Danny talking about what was happening. He looked in concern at the door's side panels, where he would hide the drug packages and drive the car to its destination. Most likely, it'd be the last time he saw that Lincoln Continental; the drug dealers used to change cars. Looking back to Danny, Rafi noticed him trying hard to reach the pedals. Rafi laughed and Danny laughed along with him.


	2. Chapter 2

**New York, December 2004**

**FBI Headquarters. Manhattan**

A quick glance through the glass walls as he walked into his office, made Danny realize the kind of day that he was going to have today. The whiteboard, where they usually placed the picture of a missing person and beside it the investigation and leads to follow, was completely clean. So it'd be a quiet day at work and Danny was grateful for it. Not only because of the previous case they had been working hard on until the day before, had been long and complicated, but also because his early visit to Rikers had him feeling at his lowest, without any energy. Dropping his bag beside the desk, he stepped out to the rest area with his mind on a hot cup of coffee.

He wasn't the first one who'd arrived at the office. His coworker Vivian Johnson, his boss Jack Malone's right hand, looked at him sideways as she read something on the newspaper and drank her coffee. The situation was actually unusual, but from time to time, not having a pressing case was very welcome and the normal stressful feelings changed into little moments like these.

"Hi Viv," He greeted with a smile as he grabbed a cup and poured coffee into it. She just handed the sports section to him with a mocking smile. Danny had completely forgotten about the baseball game. The results had been good for the Yankees, Vivian's team, and bad for Danny's team, the Mets. "Ugh…" he said, frowning.

"Did you watch the game?" She asked.

"Nope," He replied simply.

"Well," She continued in the same relaxed tone. She stared at him for a moment, before continuing, "What's her name?"

Danny frowned. Her name was Amanda, he had met her at an AA meeting and they had got along. Furthermore, Raymond, his sponsor, had asked him to do the same for her and become her sponsor. At first, he had refused because his job didn't let him devote the time she'd need, but Raymond convinced him to have a chat during the AA meetings. He insisted so much that Danny felt obligated to accept. It was the first time he got close to someone dealing with the initial phases of his own problem.

"Her name's Amanda," Danny replied, before sipping his coffee. "And it's the only thing you'll hear from me," he declared.

"All right, I'll accept that," Viv replied with a smile. "Hey, Sam," She greeted her coworker who was entering the room distractedly.

"Hi," She greeted, avoiding looking up at Viv. Vivian and Danny exchanged a curious look, "Is everything all right?" Danny asked, regretting his tense tone. Sam turned to him, glaring for a second before relaxing the tension in her face, and then replied, "Yes, as well it can be."

Without giving them the chance to ask another question, she left walking to her desk with the cup of coffee. Switching on the light, she introduced her password to access her session at the computer, as she decided where to start with the reports she had to work on. That was her job; when they didn't have to go out into the field to search for a missing person.

"Is there something going on between the two of you?" Vivian asked Danny. She didn't miss her coworker's attitude.

"It's nothing, it's just…we had a disagreement about the last case," Danny replied.

"The last case," She repeated, "Are you sure that this isn't about Martin, instead?" She continued.

Danny didn't reply. It was useless. Vivian knew them too well. But he wouldn't say anything that could be prejudicial for his friend, especially if he could avoid doing so.

In a way, Viv had been apart from team for a while and wasn't aware of Martin's problem. One year ago, she'd needed to have heart surgery and had returned to work only several days before Martin did. Still Vivian was aware of the effects the shooting had on her coworker. Beyond the crutches and bottle of painkillers, Martin's look was different; it had become insecure and evasive, without the confidence he usually portrayed.

It was a complete coincidence that the shooting and Viv's surgery had coincided and that, fortunately, Vivian's surgery had been a complete success. Beside an emotional Marcus, Viv's husband, Jack had called Danny to tell him the good news, while he and Martin were on the road, taking a prisoner Adisa Teno to the detention center.

Right after Jack's call, Danny and Martin became aware that something was very wrong. They realized that the van stopped before them didn't move when the traffic light turned green.

Vivian learned about the ambush from watching the news; a shooting involving the FBI and the occupants of a white van had resulted in one victim injured and one casualty, witnesses had stated. Adisa Teno. Martin Fitzgerald.

Fortunately, before Vivian was able to relate the events to her coworkers, Jack had explained to her that both Martin and Danny were okay; skipping the fact that Martin had spent five days critical condition fighting for his life, uncertain whether or not he would survive.

When he returned to work, Martin not only found Viv's warm loving embrace, he'd also found Sam's. Sam's warm embrace reignited the passion and relationship that they'd had only several months ago. It was also the day that they all realized the lack of attention over Danny, who despite of having just a few stitches on his forehead, began to display inappropriate behavior.

Danny always maintained the attitude that he had done the right thing trying to talk to that kid who had the bomb and was intent on destroying the building they were in. But the fact was that he had failed in his attempt to convince the kid and the kid had pushed the button. They were alive only because the bomb hadn't exploded.

Jack didn't know what Danny was thinking with the action he'd just taken. He didn't know whether Danny was trying to be a hero or trying to get himself killed. With adrenaline still running through his body and not caring about the other agents around them, Jack confronted a puzzled Danny.

Apparently, Martin's crutches and Danny's behavior had become old memories now. At least, that's how things appeared.

…..

Looking at him leaning on the balcony railing outside on a cold day, while they were warm inside decorating the Christmas tree, Vivian realized that something was wrong with Danny; just like she'd noticed earlier that something was wrong with Sam. A quick glance at Jack's office, a concentrated Martin on the computer screen and Sam demanding help with the decorations, made her think about how lucky she was that she had her family. To the rest of the team, Christmas time was difficult. Danny and Sam didn't had anyone to share those days with, Jack would probably stay at the office, nurturing his already famous workaholism and Martin didn't have any desire whatsoever to get on the flight that would lead him to Washington where he would reunite with his parents.

'What a team' she thought with a sigh. Noticing that, apparently, Danny was trying to turn himself into ice out in that balcony, Viv decided to prepare a hot drink for him, as she wondered what had happened with his brother Rafi, whom Danny didn't say a word about since his last arrest.

_Flashback_

_Arriving with the paper under his arm and his own mug of coffee, Jack headed for his office. Earlier than usual, he was surprised when he noticed that he wasn't the first one there. At the bullpen, Danny looked immersed in some sort of investigation. Frowning and curious, Jack approached him._

_Actually, instead of an investigation, Danny surprised him with law books and notes. The Bar Exam would be at the end of the month and his neighbor's baby didn't stop crying. So, he'd opted for the calm of the office. He had been sitting there, studying the entire night and had barely noticed that sun had already risen and that it was morning._

_To encourage Danny, Jack took one of the exam books and began asking him a question, but he was interrupted by the ringing of the phone. It was the beginning of a nightmare that had far from ended. Sylvia, Rafi's fiancée, had been trying to find Rafi for three days and was completely hysterical because she couldn't locate him._

_A concerned Danny decided to investigate. Like he'd told Jack, Rafi was doing well since he had left prison eighteen months ago. He was working at a car shop owned by Sylvia's brother, he was clean and they were expecting a second child. Though their relationship was complicated and they only got together occasionally, Danny didn't expect that something was wrong._

_Pretty soon Danny had realized that life hadn't changed so much for Rafi and he was the same person breaking the rules and putting at risk his own health like he had been in the past. Rafi had even admitted to Sylvia that he wasn't used to a normal life outside of prison, especially when he'd spent his time going in and out of prison for the last eighteen years. And it didn't look like he would change so easily._

_Danny once again found himself involved a lifestyle that he had left behind and didn't want to remember. In a moment of weakness he'd nearly fallen into his alcohol addiction once again when he went into a bar for a friendly get together with friends. Unable to find his sponsor, he'd gone looking for Viv. It was then that he'd admitted that every time he got close to Rafi Danny felt that he was on the edge of the dark abyss, the abyss that would lead back to his alcoholism, to his former life._

_However, Rafi's eighteen months of freedom had ended with an unusual reconciliation with his brother Danny, who had promised himself to take care of the family, at the same time he had gotten Rafi into the police car that had taken him back to prison._

_End of flashback_

Opening the door of the balcony, Viv got Danny's attention, who gratefully accepted the mug she offered to him.

"I'm glad that we don't have any case to work outside. It's so cold," She began. It was snowing again.

Danny shrugged his shoulders but didn't say anything.

"Listen…can I ask you a personal question?" She asked.

Danny smiled. "Amanda?" He asked with a raised eyebrow.

"That would be good question to ask, but I was actually thinking about your brother," She continued. "When you came to my house, you told me that you spent these days with him…"

"You have a good memory," Danny smiled softly, remembering that day at Vivian's home, struggling to not give in to his addiction, while at the same time working on finding Rafi. "Obviously, it won't happen this year," He continued, looking at the mug in his hands and avoiding Vivian's eyes.

"When Rafi went missing, you came to my house. You told me some things about your family. If you don't mind me asking, how are things with them?" Vivian was aware that she was walking on thin once asking Danny about his family, but she was worried about him and couldn't stop herself from asking the questions.

"Well, Rafi is back in prison, he's got two children now and Sylvia is doing her best to take care of everything. Fortunately, her brother and sister help her with the kids…"

"Do you maintain any contact with them?"

"Not really. I just cause them bad memories, so I avoid going over there often," He said in a near whisper as he focused on the falling snowflakes.

"Bad memories?" Vivian said with a raised eyebrow. "You saved your brother's life."

"Yes and I also handcuffed him," He murmured.

"He handcuffed himself, Danny. I told you then and I'm telling you now. I don't think your sister-in-law thinks that way. I don't think she blames you for what happened."

Danny remained silent.

"Don't do it. Don't blame yourself. Danny, you know it's perfectly well that it wasn't your fault." Vivian tried to push him but then she had a doubt. What had the two brothers talked about in that garage when Danny found Rafi getting high and trying to end his life? What was their relationship like, the history they shared? If Danny didn't tell her, it would be better to respect that.

"I think that Sam and Martin are decorating the Christmas tree. Don't you want to join them?" She asked, changing the subject.

"Sure," Danny replied. But he didn't move.

"Listen…" She began.

"I'm fine, Viv," Danny replied sharply, but realizing his tone, he smiled slightly before continuing, "…and I'll put the star as high as I can, if that'll make you happy."

"Of course," She said, ignoring his initial reaction. She knew him well enough to read between the lines. "Shall we go inside?"

Danny sighed and drinking the rest of the tea, replied, "Let's go. Let me see that star."

Inside, Martin was now helping Sam with the decorations, once he stopped working on his computer, but he couldn't stop frowning. Loneliness wasn't his problem.

With the plane ticket in his pocket, he wasn't happy about spending the next several days in Washington in a place that he remembered only brought him displeasure. Just thinking about it caused the vulnerability that Martin felt, to return at full force.

Moreover, ever since the ambush occurred, his father insisted more than ever, that Martin change his life's direction. He proposed to him a job in the FBI in Washington, where he would gain prestige and a political career. Martin had had no intention of leaving New York for a political career in Washington. Martin's feelings, however, weren't an obstacle for Victor Fitzgerald who was already talking about his son's brilliant future. It was the only thing that mattered to him. Martin had learned to live with that peculiar personality of his father, but he tried to keep as much distance between them as he could.

Martin was pretty sure that his family had influenced Sam's hesitation about their relationship. A relationship they had started right after Jack had announced his intentions to move to Chicago, trying to save his marriage, even though he never made it there. Maybe Sam's fear of commitment made Sam and Martin take different ways. Martin wanted to introduce Sam to the family; not his parents but his loved ones who she had already had met, his cousins. She always wanted to keep the relationship secret from everyone, even her coworkers, but Danny found out and supporting her, he was always joking about the nieces and nephews he would have.

Now things were very different. The triangle formed by Sam, Martin and Danny was dealing with the consequences the ambush had over Martin. The addiction to painkillers was very serious and both Sam and Danny were worried about Martin's safety and their own. Finally, Sam had talked to Martin but he denied having a problem. Desperate, she had trapped Danny in her car to ask him for help. "You know what's like to go through an addiction, Danny. You know how to help him." However, Danny wasn't strong enough to confront that specific problem and no one seemed to understand it. So he was still fighting, with Martin, with Rafi, with himself.

Placing the ladder beside the Christmas tree, Danny took the star that Martin was handing him and climbed the three rungs he needed to reach the top. As he secured the star, he remembered a childhood memory, a quick flash from a rare day of familiar scenario, when his father held him to put a star on another shorter Christmas tree, a long time ago, in the hot city of Miami. At that moment, he realized the significance of that morning's conversation with Rafi at Rikers.

Stepping quickly down from the ladder, he met Martin's glazed eyes. "What's the matter?" He blurted out, afraid that someone had noticed his sudden absentmindedness as he placed the star on the tree. Martin simply raised his hands as a reply and turned around with a sigh. Martin didn't understand his partner. Since he had come back, since he had left the hospital, Danny's attitude at first was elusive, then vigilant and now very critical toward him. It was not a big deal. He had told Sam that he needed the pills because he was still in pain. Why didn't they understand that? What were they thinking? He wasn't an addict.

However, he had turned away and had walked quickly toward the restroom as his fingered the small bottle in his pocket. He refreshed his face with water and with a trembling hand, he pulled out the bottle. Fearfully looking around, checking that there was no one else around, he opened it and took the small pill that would relieve his stress and trembling hands.

Sam stared at Danny and he knew that he didn't have a choice. Nobody else but them had noticed Martin's gesture, the glazed and elusive eyes and his sudden urge to leave. "Please," He read Sam's lips and pleading look and Danny had to put Rafi aside once more that day. Suddenly, he deeply wished that they would receive a call, a picture on the whiteboard, and someone missing to be found.

But it didn't happen and the call never came.

…..

Closing his eyes and putting the painkillers back into his pocket, Martin felt the effects almost immediately, causing a false sense of security. However, it was then that Martin heard the bathroom door opening and also the click of someone locking it, blocking anyone else's entrance to the bathroom.

Danny.

No, it wasn't true. He needed that moment; that peaceful moment he was being robbed of. He felt the heat on his cheeks, his face reddened out of rage in an uncontrolled reaction, but he wasn't able to move or speak. Lightly muddled by the effects of the pill, he couldn't react when Danny grabbed him by the jacket and pushed him against the wall. He couldn't move when Danny pulled out the bottle of painkillers and held it directly in front of his eyes. He couldn't say a word when Danny read the name of the owner of those painkillers belonged to; he'd taken the bottle of pills from a witness' house during a previous investigation. He couldn't deny that he had put the life of a child in danger and Danny had fortunately been there to do the job and cover for him and help him just like Sam had done. They were his friends and Martin had failed them. They had remained silent and observant, protecting him, putting their own jobs in danger by trying to help him and he'd refused to accept that he had a problem.

Faced with this certainty, in that restroom, with no other witnesses, Martin Fitzgerald finally understood that he'd never make it alone and he needed help. He understood that asking for help was not a weakness but the most intelligent and bravest decision he could make at that moment. Then, surrounded by his best friend, he let go, buried his head on his legs and completely ashamed let the tears roll freely down his face, in front of the only person that could understand him at that moment.

He didn't feel Danny's hand on his shoulder, when he put his inside his suit jacket or when Danny left the restroom a while later. Later that night, feeling tired from a day full of emotions and no active cases, his fingers fished a small card from his jacket pocket. He remembered his friend's words and decided that it was time to change things.

…..

Hesitating, he took a deep breath to calm his nerves before opening the door of the building. Inside, someone was speaking and he could sense the group. Unsure of what he should do, he looked around, searching for the familiar silhouette. His friend quietly looked back at him before picking up a newspaper from a chair beside him. Walking in, still unsure of being in the right place, Martin sat beside Danny in that room, where everyone had something in common: an addiction to fight to overcome.

Several times during the night, he reached inside his pocket looking for the small bottle, only to remember that, with courage, he'd made the decision to beat this addiction and had thrown out that bottle. But he realized that beating this addiction wasn't going to be as easy as attending meetings.

"What are you doing this Christmas?" Danny asked as they drank hot coffee.

The meeting had finished a while earlier and Martin felt lost and unsure in a place where, apparently, everyone else knew what to do then. Danny noticed that Martin finally calmed down only when he walked up to him. Martin was clearly aware of what had occurred that morning in the restroom and he felt very ashamed, but made the best effort to face what had happened and was grateful when Danny didn't mention anything about the incident. All of sudden, Martin realized that in that place no one asked questions and instead everyone listened when someone wanted to speak; an experience, an achievement, a failure, anything. Martin had heard stories about what went on during these types of group meeting and didn't believe in the success of coming to them, but now Martin felt comforted, he had to admit, more comforted than he'd felt in a long time.

"I have a plane ticket for Washington on the 16th." Martin responded. "I had several vacation days left and…"

"Isn't that a long time to be spending in hostile territory?" Danny teased.

"It is, but I'm also going to spend several days with my cousins. I haven't seen them since Aunt Bonnie died and we've always been very close." Martin explained. "What about you? What are you going to do this Christmas?" Martin asked.

"I spent Thanksgiving at a friend's house. Maybe you know her. It's Polly, the social worker who worked with us about four years ago. It was almost Thanksgiving and she invited me to her house. That year...the next…and now this year again." Danny said with a smile.

That all sounded like new to Martin. "Wow," He said.

Yeah…this year she's going to be working on Christmas Eve. They've organized a Christmas dinner for families in need. They're shorthanded and she asked me if I could help. Maybe I might go. I don't know, I haven't decided anything." Danny explained.

"It's a good thing. Isn't it?" Martin nodded. "I thought that you were going to go by your brother's house."

"No. All of Sylvia's family gets together and…I don't know. After everything that's happened with Rafi…I…I don't feel comfortable being with them."

"How are things going with Rafi?" Martin asked.

All of a sudden, Danny remembered the strange conversation he'd had that morning with his brother, but he didn't mention anything to his friend. "I don't know, I don't…I think it's harder for him this time. I think he was trying to do the right thing and get out of that life."

Danny not being critical and hard about his feelings about Rafi's behavior was something knew and that also surprised Martin. Maybe it was this place causing that change in Danny, he thought. "Listen, Danny. I…I haven't thanked you for what you did for me today."

"I didn't do anything, Martin. It was you, who made the decision to come here, don't you think."

"Yeah, of course, but you've supported me, you haven't said a word to anyone and you've given me a way out without having to feel ashamed in front of someone at work. I…I don't know how to thank you."

"We're friends, Martin. What's happening to you was caused by something that happened to both of us."

"What do you mean?"

"The ambush, of course, is what I mean. If it weren't for the ambush and the pain that you went through, you wouldn't have become addicted to those pills."

"We've never talked about that night," Martin murmured. "Both of us could have died out there. Have you thought about that?"

"I try not to think about it," Danny replied. He wouldn't tell Martin about the nightmares he'd suffer countless nights where his bloody hands tried in vain to keep Martin from bleeding to death. Sometimes it was Martin, other times his father took Martin's place in his dream. But what didn't change, however, was that they always took turns accusing him of being responsible for their deaths.

…..

"Did you talk to him?" Danny raised his eyes from the newspaper that he was reading, to see the concerned expression on Sam's face.

Vivian was going to talk to Danny, but frowned when she noticed Danny and Sam's body languages. "Again?" She thought.

"I don't you should worry about that situation anymore, Sam," Danny replied.

"But, did you talk to him?" She insisted.

Danny stared at her for a moment but didn't say a word. He wouldn't compromise Martin right now and there was an unwritten rule regarding the people who went Alcoholics Anonymous. There was a reason it was called 'Anonymous'. Martin was a part of the group now and Danny wasn't going to disclose to Sam what had and hadn't happened there.

But Sam didn't seem to understand that. In fact, her sole concern was that Danny talked to Martin, but she never suspected that the night before, Martin had attended his first AA meeting.

Before Sam could insist again, Martin stepped into the office with a young woman, talking cheerfully. The familiarity with which they talked to each other made Sam frown as she felt a punch of jealousy.

Danny grinned as he saw Sam's distasteful jealous look toward Martin and his female companion, making him wonder if they had restarted their former relationship, something that for some reason caused him happiness.

When Martin finally got to them, he nervously gave Vivian the file that the young woman had given to him. "We have to prepare Williams' statement, Vivian. The legal department doesn't want any mistakes. Sarah Parker is leading the case and she doesn't want any contradictions. She gave us this to study the statements," He explained nervously.

"Is she the woman you were talking to? I haven't seen her before, is she new on the job?" Vivian said.

"Yes, well, she's a family friend. She just came to the missing persons unit at the Law Department. So we're going to see her around a lot more often," He replied quickly.

"Well, I don't think we should be worried about this case, Martin," Vivian replied thoughtfully. There wasn't any reason for the concern her coworker exhibited. 'Why was he so nervous?'

Sam and Danny also noticed it, but before he made his problem evident, Danny stood up and grabbed him by the arm, nearly dragging him outside the bullpen. The gesture was enough for Sam, who'd realized that she had found the answer that she had been seeking from Danny.

"Hey, listen to me. You have to settle down, okay?" Danny whispered to Martin on their way to the coffee machine.

"Settle down?" Martin nearly screamed. "No, I don't need a coffee. I'm too wired up as it is," He protested as Danny offered a cup of coffee.

"Drink it, you'll feel better. Listen, please, calm down. The beginning is the worst part but you'll get through this, okay. Come on, talk to me," Danny encouraged as he forced his partner to sit down.

"What do you want to talk about?" Martin asked confused as he tried to understand how the hell a cup of coffee was going to help him feel better.

"Tell me how you feel," Danny asked. He remembered that speaking out loud about the initial fear to lose control, helped to actually regain control once again, especially when the other person also knew the feeling.

Twenty minutes later, Martin felt much better after confessing to Danny about the horrific night that he had spent and how he had succumbed to the temptation, looking desperately for the pills, the ones he had thrown out with confidence, just several hours before.

"This is going to happen for a long time, Martin," Danny announced. "That's why it's important you have a sponsor, a person you can talk to when you don't feel strong enough or when you feel like you're going to give in to that addiction."

Martin nodded in agreement.

"I'll introduce you someone who'll be good for you and help you out," Danny added. "No, not me," He clarified. "Besides, I'm already sponsoring someone but that's only because someone kept insisting that I be that sponsor.

"Was it the woman you stayed talking to when I left?" Martin asked, remembering how kindly Danny had greeted her.

"Yes, and I'm sorry for not having the time she needs. Unfortunately, this job ruins what little bit of social life we've got."

Martin nodded again, feeling better and more confident. Standing up, they threw the cups away in a nearby trash can before heading back to the bullpen. While outside the snow covered the streets again, inside, Jack was firmly walking toward the whiteboard with a picture in his hands. "Bad day to be missing" Jack stated seriously and Danny and Martin exchange a look of displeasure.

That case led Jack and Martin to Allison Griffith's parents, while Vivian, Sam and Danny drove to the elementary school where the little girl had disappeared from, during recreation time. While Sam talked to some students, Viv interviewed the teacher and Danny searched through Allison's personal effects, which were still on her desk.

"She hadn't planned to leave," Danny said aloud, as he removed a lunchbox and sweater from her backpack.

The teacher glanced nervously at him. The woman was very nervous; the kid was in her class and she was responsible for her safety and well-being, as well as every child in her class. A child leaving school property, unnoticed by any school officials, was a very serious matter.

"We need to look at the security tapes. If she left with someone, we may be able to identify that person," Vivian said, dialing Sam's cell phone.

"Yes… of course," The teacher agreed.

"What can you tell me about Allison? How is she interacting with her classmates? Have you noticed any recent changes in her that caught your attention?" Vivian asked.

"Well… actually, Allison is a new student here with us. Her foster parents told us about the special circumstances she'd been living since the traumatic loss of her parents. I don't know how she was before that, but she's pretty withdrawn, but well, it's normal for her, I guess. Changes…no, she's acting the same as she did the first day."

Browsing through the girl's notebooks, Danny realized something and asked the teacher, showing a notebook to her, "Is she like this all the time?" The tidiness and order he observed was unusual in a child her age and caught his attention.

The teacher smiled. "Yes… I'm not sure if it means something to you…"

"It means a lot," Danny replied without further information, Vivian got immediately. "What can you tell us about her foster parents? Do they come to the school regularly? Are they interesting in the progress she is or isn't making? Do they take of care of the Allison?"

The teacher nodded as Danny asked. "Yes, they're doing great with Ally. It's not the first time they've fostered kids at home. The Mathison Family takes part with a temporary fostering organization and they have a lot of experience. I know that because Allison is not the first child with them who's come to this school. But it's been only four months since Allison came to live with them and the beginning is always complicated."

"What happened to her biological parents? Why did they separate her from her parents?" Vivian asked.

"Her parents died during a home invasion six or seven months ago. Allison survived because she had spent that day at a friend's house. It was all over the news."

"Do you know where they lived?" Danny asked.

The teacher shook her head thoughtfully. "No. Allison is currently registered in the Mathison's home. We don't have previous information on her, however, and her foster parents don't know either. I know they came from Brooklyn but…"

"Do you know where they were buried?" Danny tried again.

"No, I don't know. I'm sorry," She replied.

"Excuse me," He agreed, as he dialed a number on his phone. If someone was able to skip the confidentiality policy without wasting time in asking for an authorization, it was her.

While Vivian continued with the interview, Danny focused on the call. He had an idea. Those tidy and organized notebooks showed Allison's need for a sense of security, warmth and peace she wasn't able to find at Mathison's house, no matter how loving they were. A feeling Danny was pretty much familiarized with. "Polly Mathews?" He asked.

"Danny?" She replied.

"Yeah, uh, listen, I'm looking for information, maybe you can help," Danny went straight to what he needed. "I need the exact address Allison Griffith's parents lived when they were killed or the cemetery where they were buried. They lived in Brooklyn Heights. They were victims of a deadly home invasion six or seven months ago."

"How old is she?" Polly asked.

"Nine years old. She's under temporary foster care with the Mathison Family. Can you please take a look and see what you can figure out?" Danny explained.

"Sure," She replied, "I'll start working on this right now."

"Brooklyn Heights is far from here. If Allison's parents lived there, I don't know how she's going to get over there unnoticed, especially in this weather. A lone child wandering the streets would catch someone's attention," Vivian told him as Danny approached her.

"Yeah, but you never know," He said, "What about the security cameras?"

"Sam is working on it," Viv started, as Danny's cell started vibrating. Raising a hand, not even reading the screen, Danny took the call. "Tell me, Polly," He demanded.

"Danny? It's Sylvia," The anxious tone of his sister-in-law made him frown surprised.

Before he could ask, she continued, "Did you talk to Rafi?"

"Yes," Danny replied. "Yesterday…"

"So? Are you going to do the exams?" She cut him off. "Doctors said there's not a lot of time left before…" Danny realized that Sylvia's confident voice turned weak and fearful. But Danny wasn't able to give Sylvia an answer. 'What was she talking about?' he wondered. "I don't know what you're talking about," He replied honestly after a pause and cursed silently as he listened to Sylvia's sobs.

Despite the fact that Danny and Rafi had been talking in prison, what Sylvia was saying didn't make any sense to him. "Listen, I can't talk to you right now. I'm working on a case and I need the line free. I'm sorry," Danny felt terrible listening Sylvia's pleas. "Um…I'll call you back as soon as possible, I promise. Then, we can talk, okay?" He had no option but to end the call.

Closing the cell phone, he felt the curious eyes of Sam and Vivian on him and felt uncomfortable. "There's nothing on the security camera," Sam announced.


	3. Chapter 3

"It's possible that Allison is still in the building," Vivian reasoned. "Let's search everywhere. Do you have the plans for this building?"

"Or course, the Principal has it." The teacher replied as they left the classroom with the three agents.

"Do you know any place the kids could hide at?" Sam asked.

"Sometimes…in the room where we keep the sport equipment, in the bathrooms…" She thoughtfully replied. "But, we already looked there. In fact, we called the FBI when we didn't find her. I was pretty sure she had left the school." She continued perplexed.

"We're going to search again," Danny replied, walking aimlessly. Sam replied upset with a "if you want, suit yourself, but we're wasting time," when Danny insisted to know if they had carefully looked over the security camera footage.

Vivian made a gesture to her colleague not to mind Danny. Sam knew Danny pretty well, but she too was also affected by cases involving kids.

The teacher guided them toward the sport center, the last place the girl had shown up on the security cameras. There had a crack around there, somewhere she could hide.

Calling the girl, they searched everywhere. It was Sam who finally raised a hand as she removed the ropes of a goal net.

"Hey," She spoke softly to the little figure before her. In a corner, curled up and with her head buried in her arms, Allison Griffith shivered.

Everyone stopped the search as the teacher sighed in relief. She tried to reach the girl, but Vivian stopped her. Sam was the only one reaching out to the girl at this delicate moment, as Danny stood a few steps behind.

Slowly, Sam was able to calm down the little girl, who finally raised her head and her blue eyes met Sam's, who couldn't help the chill that ran down her spine. She smiled at the girl as she stretched her arms toward her. The girl doubted for a second, before running to her and holding on tightly to Sam, as she sobbed uncontrollably. Sam was thankful that her back was facing her coworkers and not her face, as she fought the tears in her eyes, without realizing that Danny was doing the same thing behind her.

Vivian kept busy by calling Jack at the office, a task which she welcomed.

Once the paramedics examined Allison and informed that she was okay, Allison began sobbing again, still nervous, as she looked around and searched for something. "What's wrong? Are you looking for something?" Sam asked wrapping the girl in a blanket. The girl looked down and feeling embarrassed, she muttered: "Thumper, I don't know where he is. I've lost him."

Sam exchanged a confused look with Danny, who bent down at the height of the girl. "Were you looking for him, around here?" He asked.

The girl shrugged her shoulders. "He's always been with me, or if not, mommy took care of him. But he's not here; he doesn't like the new house. I can't leave him alone."

"Why wouldn't he like the new house?" Sam asked. Sometimes, kids talked about difficult issues using other means like other kids, pictures or even their mascots.

"Mrs. Mathison told me that she would buy a new one for me, but she doesn't understand. Thumper has always been with me."

"Okay, I understand that you've never left him alone," Danny replied. "Where do you think he could be?"

"I suppose he's at home, waiting for me. They didn't let Thumper come with me and I didn't get a chance to talk to him…" She replied, relieved that someone finally took Thumper into consideration.

Vivian approached. "There's a patrol car waiting to take Allison back home."

Neither Danny nor Sam had the guts to explain to Allison that 'home' wasn't the same home she was thinking about, but instead the Mathison home; where she would be all right and loved as Jack and Martin had corroborated.

"She'll be okay," Sam commented as she walked back to the car with Danny.

"Yeah, she's been lucky," Danny agreed, clearly thinking about something else. "Excuse me a moment," He continued as he dialed a number on his cell phone.

"Polly? It's Danny, again. I wanted to tell you that we found the girl but…have you gotten the information I asked for?"

Sam looked at him, intrigued. "Aha…sure, thanks. I'll call you back. Bye," Danny ended the call and said, "Orange Street, 35."

"What's there?" Sam asked as she put on her seatbelt.

"Thumper," Danny replied with a smirk. "Let's see if we're lucky."

"Are we looking for a rabbit?" Sam exclaimed.

"I had a panther," Danny simply replied, feeling the memories coming back…and with them Rafi…and Sylvia's call to him earlier.

…..

"Anyone want to share something with us tonight?" The moderator of the AA meeting, Adam Leonard, asked. Martin felt butterflies in his stomach when he saw Danny raising his hand.

It was a completely new experience for him, but he was getting used to those little secrets his colleague never revealed at the office. However, every time they met at the meetings, some little comment or attitude broke Danny's privacy and he wondered if it was a good idea going to the meetings with Danny.

"Today something happened and I want to say thanks to this group, because thanks to your support, I've been able to value it a different way and even help someone," He began.

"Go on," Someone encouraged him.

"When I drank, one of the excuses I made was that it was to forget, to close my eyes and forget the bad moments and the good ones relentlessly joined to them. We know it doesn't work like that. We can't forget, we can only confront and put them aside…at least the bad ones."

Danny paused.

"Today…I remembered one of those good moments and I was able to, someway, recreate them in the name of a girl. She's Allison and her stuffed rabbit, Thumper, was missing. She… she was living similar circumstances like the ones I lived at her age and then I remembered…a little stuffed panther I had and how important it was for me then."

Danny smiled nervously and drank some water before continuing. The others listened to him carefully. Sam had told Martin about it, so the story wasn't new to him.

"I realized that if it wasn't for you and the support I've gotten here for such a long time… possibly, my story with the panther, would've been lost by alcohol…or not, but I'm sure that I would never have seen Allison's happy face tonight when we found Thumper, her stuffed rabbit, for her."

_Flashback_

"_Danny, it's been months since she left, don't you think the apartment has already been rented, empty…?" Sam asked._

"_We won't lose anything by asking," Danny replied, driving the SUV through New York streets in the direction of Brooklyn Heights._

"_It's a stuffed toy, Danny. What will you say at the office when we get back? What are you going to tell Jack? That we're looking for a missing stuffed toy rabbit? Okay, fine," She concluded realizing that there was no to convince Danny otherwise._

_They entered the red brick building, which housed at least fifty apartments. The old man at the entrance hall, with a grumpy expression, didn't stop Danny from approaching and asking questions._

"_The apartment is already rented," He said. "The murder occurred several months ago. Social Services came and took the girl with them. I rented the apartment two months ago."_

"_What happened with the Griffith's personal effects?" Danny asked._

_The man raised his arms. "Those idiots left everything behind. My wife and I had to carry all of their things out the apartment. At least, the furniture was in good shape and we left it in the apartment for the new tenant," he explained._

"_What did you do with the rest of their belongings?" Danny asked again._

"_Sir, we're looking for something specific," Sam explained, surprised that Danny hadn't ask for it. "It's a stuffed toy, a rabbit…" The man raised an eyebrow. "It's important for the little girl… Allison, do you remember her?"_

"_Pete!" A far off voice exclaimed. An old woman approached them, shaking her head. "You're asking for the Griffith's belongings, aren't you?" She asked and not waiting for a response, she continued, "This grumpy old man wanted to burn everything but actually, we gave most of their things away, since nobody claimed them and we didn't have a place for the belongings."_

"_Damn," Danny said regretfully. Sam was surprised and couldn't understand why it was so important to Danny the he find that stuffed rabbit._

"_But I remember the stuffed toy, the rabbit," She added with a smile. "She always had it with her and I was surprised when I realized that she didn't take it with her. So, I put it away for her."_

"_Do you have it?" Danny exclaimed._

"_Yes, I put it somewhere. If you have time, I can go and look for it," She replied with a smile._

_Danny looked at Sam with a triumphant expression and she couldn't help but feel happy about finding the missing stuffed toy of the day._

_Sam sensed Danny's reasons for searching that stuffed toy. But her theory was confirmed when Danny gave Thumper to its owner, Allison Griffith. Trying to find something so significant during her childhood, Sam didn't find any and a sad feeling crossed her mind. It was what she didn't find and the memories of old secrets coming back made her to stop thinking. Sometimes she and Danny agreed. It was better leave the past alone._

_End of flashback_

"You can't imagine the happiness on that little girl's face and how comforting it was. It's something that never would happened if I hadn't decided stop what was leading me to my own self-destruction," Danny concluded.

An approximately fifty year old man raised his hand. Leonard pointed at him, greeting him and encouraged him to say something. "Go on Joe,"

"I've spent the day with my son, Joey. It's been a completely new experience for me. I don't remember ever being sober around him. I…I didn't know him. He's seven years old. We laughed, went to the park and we played. There was someone from social services, supervising, I suppose. Well, I guess it's normal. It's the first time that happens and it gave me the courage to keep going."

Martin didn't say a word. He didn't have anything to tell, actually. He doubted that he'd had to tell them of any experience. His addiction wasn't that deep, he concluded.

At that moment, he began to doubt why he was there, but he understood that Danny wouldn't let him go so easily. In fact, when he was later introduced to Ed Gordon, his sponsor, he felt trapped and anxious. The situation was strangely real in a surreal world to him.

Ed Gordon, a retired policeman, was an expert at making anyone laugh. Gordon was a person that you'd meet and feel as if you'd known him for years. A while later, Martin forgot all about the trapped and anxious feelings he'd felt before.

However, he couldn't help but notice Danny stepping away from Amanda, whom he had been talking to and, with the cell phone on his ear, his gestures spoke loud and clear about the argument that he was having with someone. His immediate reaction was to approach him, but surprisingly, Ed Gordon stopped him. "No, let him solve his own issues. Let's go on with our conversation. Danny has his own sponsor, leave him alone for now."

"I'm not sure if it's a good idea to come with him here. We work together, it's not…"

Ed Gordon had just met Martin but he realized that there was more to the special friendship between these two men and it wasn't just about the job.

"Just like you demonstrate a professional attitude at work, you're here for a reason, Martin. He is too. This place gives you the opportunity to feel vulnerable without being judged or afraid," He smiled. "I also lived that phase, but it's been so long ago that I don't remember why I came here in the first place," He lied.

"That's exactly what I mean. What do I tell him tomorrow at work? Do I pretend it didn't happen?" Martin asked distressed. Danny had ended the call and he'd swear he was going to throw the cell phone against the wall, in frustration. However, he kept quiet, leant on the wall; trying to calm down, Martin supposed.

He observed how Amanda grabbed her coat; it wasn't a good night to chat with Danny. She was leaving when Raymond stopped her for a moment before walking toward him. Ray Coleman, Danny's sponsor, the person who helped him when his strength weakened, something Danny had told him, rested a hand on his friend's shoulder and whispered something, as firmly led him to a chair.

"Sit down," Ray said. He had noticed Danny's gesture and right when Danny looked to throw the cell, he stopped what he was doing and headed toward him, stopping just a second to make certain that Amanda was okay. "Danny, calm down and come with me," He whispered, forcing him to sit down in the chair. Danny looked at him bewildered. "Okay, now tell me what happened, but please calm down," Ray insisted.

Danny sat down, but he was far from calm. It wasn't a good thing to lose control like that, especially in that place. But he couldn't stop himself. Ray being there was a God-send, Martin witnessing his outburst, however, was a disaster.

"What's going on, Danny?"

His cell phone started ringing, shortly after Danny and Amanda began talking.

Frowning at the caller ID, Danny excused himself and stepped away. "Sylvia?" He confirmed more than asked.

"Why haven't you called me?" She asked in a clearly upset tone. "I've been waiting all day for your call, Danny."

"Um...listen; I'm sorry, I was wor…"

"Don't make excuses," She cut him off. She didn't want to listen to him.

Danny tried to keep calm. "What's the matter?"

"You have to go tomorrow morning to Saint Andrews Hospital. Early. Ask for Dr. Trafford, he's going to be waiting for you," Was the surprising replied he received.

"What! What are you talking about?" Danny asked surprised. "You can't do that without asking me!"

"That's what I've been trying to do all day, Danny, but there's no way to get you to answer your phone or call me or listen to what I'm telling you!" She exclaimed before continuing. "Rafi is dying, okay? There's only one way to try to save his life and that's by you doing those tests."

Danny froze. "I didn't….didn't know anything."

"What do you mean?!" She yelled. "What did Rafi talk to you about, then? Didn't he tell you?"

"No…"

"I don't believe you, Danny. You just don't want to help him. That's it, sure. You feel better with Rafi in jail. That way, you keep living your life…"

"That's not fair and it's not true!" Danny exclaimed trying to keep his voice low, but he was really upset and his body language clearly gave away how he felt.

"Prove it," She screamed sobbing. "Go to the hospital, have the tests done tomorrow. I already told you; Saint Andrews Hospital. Dr. Trafford. We'll talk afterwards."

Trying to memorize the name, Danny realized he had no options. "What tests are you talking about?"

"Take a urine test and don't have breakfast. It's a blood draw, a simple blood draw," She said. "I have to go, I've got night shift and I'm late. Bye."

Sylvia ended the call and Danny remained looking at the phone. A wave of fear and anger invaded him and caused him to start losing control but he suddenly saw Raymond Coleman, his sponsor, just two inches in front of him, invading his space, grabbing him and starting to talk to him, asking him to calm down. Was his anger that evident? Danny wondered about the people there, they didn't seem realize his situation. And Martin? He almost panicked feeling that vulnerable, but it looked as if Raymond was the only one understanding what was happening to him.

Just a little bit calmer, he tried to explain a matter he didn't understand well, but he was only able to state the facts, empty facts, that didn't explain his reaction, which had another meaning, long time ago, on a invisible rope that kept them close with no chance of escape.

…

Dragging the suitcase through the FBI corridors, Martin looked around nervously, not knowing well how to confront Danny about last night's situation. Not having too much time and regretting the fact he had to take a plane to Washington in the afternoon, he expected a chance. But he didn't see his colleague.

"Are you leaving?" Vivian asked, noticing the suitcase.

"Yeah," He groaned. "Is Danny here?" He couldn't help but ask.

"Not yet, he called to say that he's going to be late," She explained.

"Did he say why?" Martin asked again, instantly regretting his question, when he noticed the surprised look on Vivian's face.

"No," She replied. "Is there something you want to tell me, Martin?"

"No, no…it's just that I wanted to give him some things that he asked for." He lied, knowing that Vivian wouldn't believe him.

"All right," She conceded. Something happened with her three colleagues and she was out of the loop. She was upset, but she also wondered if it was better that way. Her responsibility could make her to do something she wouldn't like to do.

When Martin saw his colleague entering the bullpen and heading directly to Jack's office, one hour later, he thought the scene from the last night had to do with it, but the only thing he remembered was the story Danny himself had told in the AA meeting. However, Sam didn't look worried about anything and she was there with Danny. Frowning, he tried to focus on the files he had to work on, which he was able to work on for some time.

It wasn't much time what kept Danny in Jack's office. As he left and headed for his desk, Danny felt Martin's eyes over him and he felt embarrassed, although not a lot. The events of that early morning at the hospital, made him get distracted with other issues.

"Morning," He greeted casually.

"Good work yesterday," Vivian greeted with a smile. Danny looked at her and then Sam, who laughed.

"I warned you that it'd happen, Danny." Sam laughed.

He shrugged his shoulders. "It was worth a try."

"Reggie had a stuffed toy his aunt gave him when he was born. It was a little tiger, but it looked really big beside him," Vivian started talking. "He got used to it and he always carried it to sleep. One day, he was already seven years old, the stuffed little tiger still worked out for him, and Marcus and I took him to a friend's home for a sleepover. Marcus had to leave the restaurant we had gone to for dinner, go back home, take the tiger and give it to him. My son caused a scandal when he realized he didn't have his tiger." Vivian laughed. "It was more important the need than the shame of confessing that he couldn't sleep without his tiger. I didn't think it was that important at seven years old but…"

"You see?" Danny laughed, as Sam raised her arms as if giving up.

"Yeah…" Martin smiled. "I also had 'someone', but I won't tell you what it was," He added. "I'm going to grab some coffee. Anyone else wants something?" He continued as he stood up. "Danny?" He asked specifically, which called Vivian's attention.

"Sure," Danny agreed.

An opportunity to talk, Danny thought.

"I'm leaving for Washington this afternoon," Martin started, placing the paper cup on the coffee machine. Danny didn't say anything so Martin continued. "Last night…I spent some time talking to Ed Gordon. I think it'll work out, he's easy to talk to and…"

"Good," Danny said smiling. "You'll do well. And he's a jokester…you'll do well with that too."

"Danny…" Martin protested. Danny was always laughing at his expense. In a way, it was true that the rigid education he'd received had influenced him and Danny was right on the other side. That way of verbally shaking him, rather than making him upset, had led to the deep friendship they shared.

Martin finally burst into laughter but he realized that they wouldn't talk about anything related to the AA meetings. "And you, what are you doing? Are you going to accept that friend's proposal…Polly?"

"I don't know yet. I've got some pending issues," Danny replied.

"Does it have something to do with what you were doing this morning?" Martin was serious.

"What I've been doing this morning?" Danny laughed, which made his colleague blush.

"I'm sorry," Martin replied. Throwing the empty paper cup, he sighed. "Let's go back to work. I have several reports to finish before leaving. Um…do you know what? Ed Gordon gave me several addresses in Washington, in case I wanted to attend any meeting…but…I don't know what to do. It's other people…"

"Go, it's the same everywhere, just more to the South," Danny replied with a smirk.

Martin looked at him. "What's up with you today? Aren't you going to give me a break?" And, not expecting a replied, he headed for his desk.

Sometimes he used jokes to keep safe what he didn't want to tell or what he was dealing with. Danny knew what Martin pretended that morning and he wouldn't let him go that far. What happened in AA meetings, stayed there.

More things remained behind locked doors. So, having to talk to Jack that morning, right after coming back from the hospital, was complicated for him, especially when he didn't want to give too many details about what was going on.

Having memorized what he wanted to tell Jack, Danny left the elevator and stepped toward his superior's office. Softly knocking on the door, he got Jack's attention before entering Jack's office.

"Mrs. Mathison called me this morning," Jack said with a incredulous look.

He wasn't expecting that. Suddenly, Danny forgot his memorized words, as he attempted to come up with an explanation. But Jack didn't look angry. "I suppose that it was a kind gesture on your behalf," Jack continued, "but I won't include it in the final report."

"Eh…that's…oh well, that's okay," Danny stuttered. "Um…listen…I want to ask for…I need one day…maybe just a morning off…" He added.

"Does this have something to do with your visit to the hospital this morning?" Jack asked, frowning. Danny hadn't said much and now he wondered if Danny was sick.

"Oh…yes. It's… just routine," Danny started.

"Is it anything that I have to worry about?" Jack asked.

"No…no," Danny didn't know what to say. He had memorized the words, but it wasn't working out now.

Fortunately for Danny, Jack was one to interfere with anyone's life, and he trusted Danny. "Okay, then, you can take tomorrow morning off," Jack replied.

"Yep," Danny sighed. "I'll come in as soon as possible," He added as he opened the door.

"Sure," Jack put his glasses back on before focusing on the documents on his desk, but he looked up and followed his agent's steps toward his desk. He saw him greeting his colleagues and thought that he had nothing to be worried about.

Jack wasn't aware of anything being wrong until three days later, when his superior, Alexander Olczyk came into his office, visibly angry.

The definitive order, from Deputy Director Victor Fitzgerald, caught Olczyk off guard, even though it wasn't a surprise to him. Jack Malone was well known for taking his investigation to the edge of the legality and putting him in awkward situations.

Picking up the phone to call his agent, he decided it would be better to talk to him, directly, so he went down the three floors from his office and entered Jack's office. Olczyk was also intrigued about what Jack was investigating, what he was investigating about a person with the reputation of George Gordon. A former politician with a solid career, he had gained respect and prestige when he developed and created the Caroline Foundation, a personal initiative that began in the late seventies and today was a big organization which had several Centers around the United States. Supported for the most part, by the altruistic contribution of friends and supporters, but also his work, the Caroline Foundation had become an important and well known support to families at risk of being a broken home. In accord with Social services, they worked with kids, helping with their education, providing the basic needs of the families and helping them to stay together and avoid separation and the need to be sent to foster homes. It also helped to improve the economic and emotional situation of the families. The success of the programs had given George Gordon public recognition, several awards, which helped the donations to the cause, improved the social work along the years.

Olczyk sensed that George Gordon had to be a good friend of Victor Fitzgerald. So Jack had better have a good reason for investigating him.

Thinking about it, he opened Malone's office without announcing himself and skipping the courtesy, he asked: "Why are you investigating George Gordon?"

Surprised by the tone and attitude of his boss, Jack finally frowned and invited Olczyk to sit down with a gesture but it was useless, since Olczyk didn't move or change his questioning tone.

"You mean George Gordon… the senator?" Jack asked intrigued. Gordon wasn't a senator anymore but he seemed to keep that position perpetually.

"Of course," Olczyk replied sharply, before Jack could finish asking his question.

"Well…no. We're not investigating George Gordon. Why would we do that?"

"There's an agent from your team asking awkward questions, and I've received a call from up above to stop this immediately."

"I don't know what you're talking about," Jack replied. And added: "but you seem to know more than me, Alex," Whatever it was, Jack didn't have control over it, and taking the conversation to a more informal way, he tried to keep the matter just between them, as colleagues with years of experience.

But he failed.

"Right, then we'll ask your agent. I understand the control you have over your team is…" Olczyk began but Jack didn't let him continue.

"Come on, Alex", Jack cut him off. "What's going on? You know my team has had to deal with a traumatic experience and I don't think asking for my head again or destabilizing my team is the most intelligent thing you can do right now, even though you're just following orders."

"You're not that important, Jack. And stop making excuses about the ambush your agents were involved in. Everything has an end date." Olczyk said. "I know you have no clue what's going on, so we better ask agent Taylor, your agent, why he's been persistently calling Social Services in Miami, asking for sensitive information related to George Gordon."

Jack tried to keep a straight face, as he shifted in his seat.

"He's insisted so much, that it came to Gordon's attention. So, now he's furious, because you know how important his public image is to continue receiving the support for the foundation that he runs."

"That doesn't make him untouchable," Jack said frowning.

"So you acknowledge that you're investigating him."

"I'm not acknowledging anything. I've told you I don't know anything about you've told me. My agents usually look over unsolved cases constantly, not having to tell me, unless something relevant comes up. Asking for information doesn't mean that someone's being accused of something." Jack didn't have a clue about what was going on with Danny, but since the ambush, with or without end date, he couldn't put his hand in the fire for him. Still, he tried to reason the easiest way possible.

"Well, since I have to give an answer and you don't have it, I have no choice but to ask agent Taylor, directly," Olczyk replied, pointing to the phone.

That's what Jack was most afraid of. He knew Olczyk and could deal with him. But his agents were in a more vulnerable position.

"I've been receiving complaints that you're pressuring Social Services in Miami to give you several files, which you've already been told that you won't get," Olczyk said, as soon Danny opened the door.

He had never been good at dealing with his superiors and the surprising comment left him speechless. He had to make a big effort to try to understand what was going on. Taken off guard by Olczyck's question, Danny froze.

"It's a personal matter," He finally replied, and he knew that it had been a mistake as soon as he saw Jack close his eyes momentarily.

"And, are you using your FBI credentials to get something that you'd never obtain otherwise?" Olczyk asked.

Danny didn't know what to answer. "It's important to me," He replied.

"Yes, I've heard that, a personal matter. But you understand that you've committed a very serious offense."

Danny looked at Jack confused, who frowned. He didn't have a clue what was going on and at that moment he didn't find a better explanation. "Come on, Alex, we've all done the same thing, at some point in our careers."

"I'm waiting for your explanation, Agent," Olczyk insisted, ignoring Jack's words.

"I can't…I can't give you any, Sir. As I said, it's a personal matter. I don't think I've compromised anything trying to get something that's not important for anybody else, but me."

"So you say. But I don't care about your reasons. The issue is that you used your credentials," It was a weak excuse, but it's exactly what Victor Fitzgerald wanted. "Starting today, you'll have the next three weeks to think what you've done. You're hereby suspended without pay, for the next three weeks. Reflect on what you did and decide whether or not it's worth trying to do it again. If you do it again, the consequences for you are going to be grave." He warned.

Olczyk left Jack's office, leaving Jack and Danny completely speechless.

Danny had turned pale. What had happened? What had he done? He thought about his brother's words, could there be any truth to the story Rafi had told him? Why hadn't he believed him when Sylvia and even the doctors at the hospital, gave him a chance?

_Flashback_

_Danny arrived at the hospital that early morning, just as Sylvia had told him to. Although upset, he had memorized the name of the hospital and the doctor he should meet. Despite his anger, he was there. Nobody would tell him that he hadn't helped a brother who had abandoned him for several grams of cocaine and something else._

"_I'd like to speak with Dr. Trafford, please. My name's Danny Taylor, he's expecting me," He said to the young woman at the reception desk._

"_One moment, please. You can have a seat in the waiting room. I'll call you when he's ready."_

_Impatiently, he looked at the time. He'd be late. 'Damn it,' He muttered as he dialed Jack's cell phone number._

"_Malone," He heard at the other end of the line._

"_Jack, it's Danny. Listen…I'm…I think I'm going to be running late."_

"_What's going on?" Jack asked._

"_I'm at the hospital for a routine test, but this is full of people and…"_

"_All right," Jack cut him off. "Are you okay?"_

"_Yes, yes, it's not important. Thanks Jack." Danny silently cursed; he wasn't going to give any explanations. If Rafi had gotten into his colleagues' lives, it had just been an accident. It wouldn't happen again._

_Ten minutes later, Dr. Trafford explained to him why he was there, as a nurse pricked his arm with a needle and drew his blood. He finally knew what was happening to his brother._

"_Rafael is gravely ill. The excesses have damaged his liver to such point that he needs an urgent transplant. Otherwise, his life expectancy isn't good. I don't know if he or his wife explained this to you."_

"_No…well, something, but I didn't know it was that bad," Danny said._

"_We've been evaluating his case and right now, there's no time to wait for a compatible liver for Rafael, so we thought that the best way is looking to the family for help. I suppose that if you're here it's because you've given your consent…"_

"_My consent…for what?" Danny asked fearfully._

"_We can extract a piece of liver from a compatible family donor, and transplant it into Rafael. He told me you're his only living relative so…didn't your sister-in-law tell you any of this?" The doctor asked concerned, as he noticed Danny's surprised, yet fearful, expression._

"_No…she…she told me about several tests…a simple analysis…" Danny didn't know what to say or what to do. And he wasn't sure about the health of his liver, either, which he too had abused with alcohol for many years, before he became sober._

"_Yes, well. If you agree, we'll need to do something else apart from the analysis that we're doing here today. Tomorrow morning we'll have to do a more delicate test. We would have to do a biopsy, which means, taking a sample of your liver to analyze it and study the compatibility with Rafael. We need to be_ o_ne hundred percent certain that you're compatible._

"_Listen…I'm not sure that I'm…" Danny started._

"_I understand your hesitation. You should know that you can refuse and we'd just add Rafael to the transplant waiting list, but as I've told you, we think that's not an option for him. It also looks like there's no way to find his other siblings, so…"_

"_Other…siblings," Danny muttered. "Listen, there are no other siblings. I don't know what Rafael told you, but I'm pretty sure that's part of his hallucinations."_

_The doctor frowned. "Is it not true? Rafael explained to us that he has two other siblings, a brother and a sister. He also gave us the names."_

_Danny shook his head as the doctor was talking. "No, no…that's impossible. I'd know about it and we never…we never talked at home, about having another brother or sister, and I never saw them."_

"_Your brother told us they were taken away, adopted. That your parents never talked about it again and he even hesitates about the fact. Rafael is aware of his mental weakness, but he seems very sure about this."_

"_But, he never told me about this until…"_

"_Did he tell you about this possibility?"_

"_Yes…several days ago…in prison. Um…why…why is he in prison if he's so ill?" Danny was confused; he didn't understand what was happening._

"_He's not there anymore. He's here. You can talk to him if you wish."_

"_I can't," Danny said quickly. "I'm late for work," He tried to justify._

"_Right, but think about that test. You could help him, could save his life. Or, maybe you could try to find those siblings."_

_Danny shook his head. "I don't know…I'll come for that test, but I don't think I can help."_

"_Okay," Dr. Trafford wouldn't let him go without taking that chance. "In that case, come back tomorrow, at 9.30. It won't take more than two hours of your time. You'll feel just a little discomfort but it'll go away throughout the day."_

_Danny didn't know what to say, feeling trapped at the moment, so he found himself in Jack's office asking for a free day, without no reasons and badly, just because of a stupid stuffed toy._

_The stuffed toy, his colleagues' jokes, Martin's attempt to talk about last night in the AA meeting, his departure to Washington, the documents on his desk to organize, weren't enough to make him forget the events of that morning, the call from Rikers several days before asking for him to go there. Rafi wanted to talk to him. About what? About the past? From the beginning, he knew it wasn't a good idea, but now he didn't know what to do._

_Throughout the day he tried dialing the phone number he knew he should call. He hesitated about getting the information that way._

_At seven, it was already dark, Jack had left, Sam was in the archive room and Vivian had also left because of a family matter. If there was any moment he could call, it was then. Nervously, Danny picked up the phone and dialed the number. He had to clear his throat, realizing that being nervous caused his voice to crack._

"_We can't give you that information right now, Sir. You have to come here in person and fill out a form…" The woman on the other end of the line explained._

"_Listen, I know that, but it's important. I can give you the file's number if you want…"_

"_I'm sorry, Sir, but I can't give you the information that you're requesting."_

"_Look, I'm a federal agent, I'm working with missing persons," Danny gave her his ID, aware of the mistake of breaking protocol, but he knew that he wasn't the first one to do something like that. Besides, what harm could it cause? "I need that information. It's urgent for a case we're working on."_

"_One moment," The woman on the other end replied._

"_Agent Taylor?" Another voice spoke after a moment._

"_Yes, I am," He replied anxiously. _

"_I'm sorry, but I can't give you that information. If you need it, you have to come here, fill the form and we'll see what we can do for you."_

"_Listen, do you know how cold it is in New York? Somewhere outside there is a person missing that we need to find as soon as possible. We need that information." _

"_Conduct your search another way. There's a protocol that we have to follow, just like you. Send an agent here from the FBI offices in Miami if you'd like. But I can't give you that information by phone, no matter how urgent the matter is."_

_Danny continued with the phone in his hand, they'd hung up on him. Somehow he felt relieved of not having to investigate a story he had promised to deeply bury. He admitted that Rafi's hallucination was just that, a hallucination._

_He'd have the tests done. But he wouldn't feed his brother's insane ideas, he decided._

_End of flashback_

"Well?" Jack asked. "Would you mind telling me what are you doing, Danny?"

"I don't…I don't know, it's nonsense, Jack. How the hell did he know?"

"What did he find out? " Jack insisted. "Do you know what a fool I made of myself in front of Olczyk, not being able to give him a reasonable explanation as to what's going on? What were you doing?"

"It's…it's personal," Danny insisted.

"Yes, that's what you said, good answer. Three weeks of vacation," Jack replied angrily.

"That's not fair, I didn't do anything wrong,"

"Using your credentials to get personal information you wouldn't otherwise get…that's something, Danny," Jack observed. "We've all done it at one time…but it's been to gain access to a database or files. You can't expose yourself that way."

"I don't get it, I was only asking for my personal file, my family's file. What does that have to with Olczyk? Who called him? Why?"

"Have you heard of George Gordon?" Jack asked him. He understood Danny's confusion.

"No," Danny frowned. "What does he have to do with any of this?"

"That's the first question Olczyk asked me." Jack replied.

"I don't know who he is." Danny confirmed.

"Sit down," Jack said.

"Jack…"

"Sit down, damn it! And listen to me!" Jack exclaimed. 'Why was it so difficult for him to listen?'

Danny sat down and crossed his arms. Jack sighed. "You can't keep secrets from me, or give me on half-truths. Not with me, I'm your boss. I want to know exactly what's going on and you won't be leaving this office until you tell me."

Danny shook his head. "There's nothing to tell. It's something personal."

"What were you doing at the hospital?" Jack opted for what came to him at the moment, that most recent event.

"It's personal," Danny replied again, stubbornly. "I've been suspended because I mixed my personal life and work. That's clear, isn't it?"

Jack felt his heart racing, but he tried to keep his cool. "I'm not Olczyk. Danny, you know what I had to evaluate from you when you joined us. I'm not using it, but I know things about you that I know, you wouldn't like me to. I can help you, if it's necessary. You can trust me."

"I can't explain it," Danny swallowed. He was aware of Jack knowing some issues about him that would make him hesitate when he allowed him on his team.

"The hospital, Danny. Why did you go there?" Jack asked again.

"It's Rafi," Danny finally replied. "They asked me to do some lab work and then they asked me to have another test, if necessary. It's routine."

"Routine," Jack repeated. "What's going on with Rafi?"

"I don't know; he's sick. Jack, I'm sorry about what happened. Honestly, I don't get it, but if things are like this…well, I'm sorry. I don't want to cause you any trouble," Danny continued as he stood up.

That behavior was unusual for Danny. Jack was plenty aware of Danny feeling uncomfortable with this situation and wouldn't answer his questions.

"Okay, take this time as a vacation and think about it," Jack agreed, unable to learn anything else. He wouldn't subject his agent to an interrogation, not after what had happened. The ambush Danny and Martin were involved in had caused consequences still present in their behavior, especially on Martin and Danny.

Danny was leaving his office when Jack realized something. Standing up, he called, "Danny, I need your badge and your gun," It wasn't easy to tell him that.

"Right," Danny replied, removing both things and handing them to Jack. "Vacation," He continued.

"Yeah," Jack reassured him with a slap on his back. "We'll talk."

Danny left, unnoticed. Neither Sam nor Vivian realized it until late in the day, when they noticed his absence. Jack didn't tell them too much. He was also confused, it was unfair, he admitted. Danny had acted wrongly, but as he well said, it wasn't a reason for Olczyk to be that angry. There wasn't a reason for a suspension like that.

Fortunately, in the following days Nick Carter's team would take over the Missing Persons Unit, as Jack and his team enjoyed several real vacation days.

By the time they returned to work, Martin would be back from Washington and Danny's absence would be less noticeable.


	4. Chapter 4

"Marty, it's so great to see you!" His cousin exclaimed as she opened the door. Jamie expected her cousin's visit who she felt very close with. No wonder, they had spent a lot of time together during their childhood and teen ages, since Marty, as they called him, had spent a lot time with them.

Jamie had been very worried about the serious injuries her cousin had suffered and felt happy to see that Marty was the same kind person he always was.

Martin was also happy to see his cousin and his small niece who was already running around happily and he remembered the last time he'd stayed with them, two Christmas ago, when his aunt Bonnie had lost contact with her family and Jamie didn't hesitate in calling Martin for help.

How different things were then from the moment he was living now! And thinking about it, he found himself sitting down on the comfortable couch of the living room at his cousin home, opening his heart and telling her, only her, the personal situation he was living.

"But, how did everything start? Why didn't you ask for help?" She asked worriedly.

"I…I don't know, Jamie. At first, it was because of the memories of what had happened, those moments of the shooting. It's been very confusing, I only have the information because I read the reports from the case, but it's personally very confusing. I…I remember my colleague's expression and that he was calling me. Then…then I don't remember anything. When I woke up in the hospital, dad was there. You know, I didn't know if he was going to argue with me or what. I felt awful. At the moment, I didn't know that I had almost died and there was only a worried expression in his eyes, but…"

Jamie smiled. She knew her uncle well. Victor Fitzgerald had always been short of affection… or any sentiment actually, toward his family, but that didn't mean that he didn't care. But she also knew how much pain that caused his son. Martin was different. He was more like Bonnie, like her. His blue eyes revealed a kindness that you'd never see in Victor Fitzgerald's eyes.

"When I left the hospital, I was given painkillers to relieve the pain. I went back to work and everything was going well again, except when I tried to get close to Danny."

"Danny is your colleague, the one with you during the ambush?" Jamie wanted to clear up.

Martin nodded. "Yes, somehow it's been difficult to us to reconnect again like we did in the past. It's like an invisible wall is keeping us apart and…"

"That's normal, Martin. It must be hard for you two. It's a miracle that you're still alive. Didn't you talk to each other about what happened?"

"No, but every time I saw him, it was like I was seeing flashes from that moment. I think he was having those flashes also and it was, it is, difficult to accept. I realized that the medication helped not only with the physical pain but also with the emotional turmoil I was going through. I think it was then when I decided to take that path. Jamie, you can't believe what it's, what the people in the meetings I attend, talk about…"

"Alcoholics Anonymous?" She asked. "I can imagine. Why did you decide to go there? Sure, someone had to help you, didn't they?"

"Sam, do you remember her? She was with me when Aunt Bonnie went missing…and Danny, of course. He has helped me a lot. He made me think clearly and offered a way to stop hurting myself. I was so lost. I know he isn't going to allow me to give up, to fail, because I think he'd see it as his own failure. It's a lot of pressure but it's fine, it's good for me."

"But…it's your decision, your life, we're talking about, Marty," Jamie disagreed in concern. She didn't know Danny, it couldn't be that his cousin depended on him that much, not at that level he implied.

"Yes, it's what he always tells me, but…I don't think I could do it if he wasn't there for me, vigilant," Martin reasoned, realizing that feeling for the first time since he had decided to put his life on track. What was he going to do during the weeks he was going to stay with his parents…far from the control of his colleagues, from Danny, from Sam?

"You'll have to do it, cousin. You've got three weeks ahead of you in Washington," His cousin said, still worried.

"Yeah, I'll have to do it," Martin sighed. "How is Allison doing?" He asked about his other cousin.

"We'll meet here, for Christmas Eve, at mom and dad's house. She's attending some interior design course in Chicago. She's going to come back next week. We'll have plenty of time to meet up again."

"Sure," Martin said. "Actually…I know it's not the right thing to do, but…"

Jamie smiled and rested her hand on her cousin's leg. She had read his mind and understood clearly what he meant. His parents had never had the sense of affection toward family that Bonnie had effectively had with hers. Even in her absence, her spirit was all around the house. And Martin had lived long periods of time with them, time that held a lot of happy memories.

"I understand you well, don't feel bad about that. But, come by the house, we don't live that far," Jamie encouraged him. "By the way, you're staying for dinner, right? We're going to use the new barbecue for the first time."

"Of course, thanks," Martin smiled gratefully.

It was there where he felt happy, enveloped and loved by his family. Following his journey to his parent's home was like an uphill battle, something he didn't want to do. But he had to. He'd try to stay the least amount of time possible there. He tried to remember something warm in his own home, but he didn't find it. His mother, devoting all her energy and time to charitable causes and his father, engulfed by his work and his political career, had no time for family. And that's the way that it was, since Martin was able to reason.

He couldn't help but remember his cousin's warm welcome, when his own mother opened the door. "Martin, honey!" She exclaimed with a smile. They hugged each other, while he could hear what it sounded like an argument coming from inside.

"Ah…your father, talking with someone on the phone," She excused Victor. "We've prepared several charitable days for Saint Patrick," Saint Patrick hotel was the new place to be in Washington. It had been opened seven months ago and its large, luxurious and shiny new halls. Some media conventions had already been celebrated there, Martin remembered, which would be a good occasion to promote the new hotel.

"I'll leave the suitcase in my bedroom," Martin said, heading to the stairs. His mother followed him, telling the list of famous people who would go to that charitable event. Martin was never certain if they did it for a charitable purpose or to actually promote his father's political career, or if it was to look for the appropriate girlfriend for him.

While walking upstairs, Martin thought that he'd heard his father mentioning 'Malone', right before hanging up the phone, visible bad tempered, as Martin noticed as soon as he met him later. His father barely noticed him and didn't even bother to welcome him. "I don't know what you see in that incompetent boss of yours, Martin! That way, my efforts are going to be worthless!" He said with a roar.

"Hi, dad," Martin said with a sigh. And he felt ridiculous for not being able to take his suitcase and leave the house that instant.

…..

Walking towards his office, Danny couldn't help but feel his stomach cringe from the nerves, but he had time to get ready as he headed to his desk.

The Christmas decorations were missing and his colleagues were talking about theories over the case they were working, filling in the missing events of the life of the missing person during the last twenty-four hours, the most useful information they could have to find that person.

But, Danny wasn't able to contribute with any idea to a case that they were working for some hours, so he just sat down at his desk and waited for his colleagues to finish.

Being welcomed back to work after a suspension was different than being welcomed after a vacation or an illness, and Danny soon noticed the difference in his colleagues, especially with Martin, who for some unknown reason avoided meeting his eyes. He hadn't had time to observe them more since Jack, with a gesture, invited him to follow him. A conspiratorial smile and a whispered 'come on!' from Sam, only made him more nervous, as he noticed the warning look Vivian gave to his boss. Could Jack have told them something? Sure. What had happened during those three weeks? And, why did Martin barely look at him?

He was thinking about it, as he followed Jack to his office. But after letting him enter the office, and closing the door, the immediate silence seemed like an eternity to him and all of a sudden made him to reevaluate his situation.

"How are you doing?" Jack asked, as he opened his desk drawer and took out Danny's badge and his gun.

"Good," Danny replied.

"Toasting under the sun, I see," Jack observed noticing the light tanned skin of his agent.

Danny shrugged his shoulders.

"From Miami, I suppose," Jack continued.

Danny felt uncomfortable but he couldn't deny what was clearly evident. "Yes, I've been to Miami."

"Looking for that information?" Jack asked.

It was useless denying it. "I couldn't find anything anyway and…well, it's not important anymore," He replied trying to control his breaking voice.

Jack looked at him. He knew that Danny wouldn't tell anything he wouldn't want to. Something had happened, that was clear, but would he ever know what?

"All right," Jack handed him some documents. "Listen Danny, this…all of this has been strange. I don't think you deserved that suspension. Actually, I think they are going after me, as usual. If…I could do anything, if you tell me…"

"It's okay, Jack," Danny cut him off. "I…I made a mistake; I did something I shouldn't have done. That's all. You won't get any other complaints because of my behavior on that matter. What's this?" He asked looking at the documents Jack had handed to him.

"Work," Jack smirked. "Study those accounts; you know what you need to look for,"

Danny grimaced. Paperwork meant long boring hours in the office. He supposed he deserved that. "Thank you," He muttered before leaving Jack's office, on his way to get a big mug of coffee before heading to his desk.

"Hey, Danny, what's going on? Where have you been? I come back from Washington and find out you're missing, suspended. I've gone by your house, I haven't seen you at the meetings..." Martin began, visibly worried.

As soon as he saw Danny leaving Jack's office, Martin had stood up and walked up to him.

"Hey!" Danny cut him off in surprise, and noticing the worried expression Martin had, he tried to calm him down. "It's okay, nothing's wrong,"

"What do you mean there's nothing wrong, Danny? I thought we were friends, we were in this together…" Martin insisted.

"Together, in what? Martin, listen…we're not together in this. I think you're overreacting, confusing the situation…" Danny was surprised by Martin's reaction. He didn't remember any pending matter with him.

Noticing that Martin was not only worried but also angry, Danny continued, keeping loyal to the line he had decided to make separating his personal life from his work life. If that included Martin and his questions, that was something he would have to deal with, something he'd have to stop. "Do you think I have to give you any explanations about something? Where I've been and what's happened is not your business. It's only mine."

"I'm worried about you; I thought we could trust each other. I've trusted you. I thought you would do the same, Danny. You can't…you can't just disappear like that," Martin had relaxed his tone, but Danny wasn't able to do the same.

"Are you going to put my picture on the whiteboard? Forget it, Martin. It's not a road you'd like to take with me."

"What happened? Jack told us that you had been suspended from work without pay. Listen…" He was going to add something about the conversation about Malone he'd had with his father, but something made him stop.

"Nothing. It was a trivial, let it go."

"A triviality doesn't end with three weeks of suspension, Danny," Martin disagreed. "While I was in Washington, something happened. I heard my father talking to someone, about Jack, very angry. I think it had to do with this, I think…I think my father is blaming you for the ambush."

Danny felt his blood freeze. He kept calm as much as he could. "Your father…or you?" He confronted Martin.

He didn't expect that reaction from Danny, but at that moment, he realized the intensity of the memories from that event. "I…I've never blamed you for anything, Danny. We were together. It happened to me like it would have happened to you, and you know that. But you don't know my father, he…"

"Don't make excuses for your father, Martin," Danny cut him off scornfully.

Martin stared at his friend. Something had happened in those three weeks, something that had changed Danny's behavior. The idea of his father having something to do with it, that it was revenge against the person who had helped the most, his friend, was difficult to deal with.

"It's not an excuse, I'm just saying that the suspension is clearly excessive and by what my father told me and what I heard, I supposed it could be related. I know how my father works. Don't think that what happened that night was your fault, Danny. Don't you dare think that."

"I know," Danny remained silent for a moment. He felt very tired, confused and vulnerable as well. But his decision to keep for himself what was happening with his personal life was strong. "What about Washington?" He asked in a casual tone, as if the tension created between them had vanished.

Martin shook his head in disgust. "If that's the way you want it, Danny." And without replying to the question, he turned around and left.

Danny remained quiet for a while. He sat down and started sipping his coffee, trying to calm down but he couldn't. He didn't want to stay there, although minutes before it had been his only wish. He wanted to cry but he couldn't and he didn't know why, either. The last three weeks had been emotionally intense, especially the last two, and He still hadn't shed a single tear.

_Flashback_

_All of a sudden, Danny realized that he was at home and had nothing to do, except take the next three weeks ahead to think, as Jack has said, about his behavior. He would also have to save money. _

_Danny didn't like free time. Free time to him, meant temptations he'd prefer to keep away. Thinking about calling Ray Coleman, Danny removed his cell phone from his pocket, but he dialed other number. "Polly? It's Danny," He continued when he heard his friend's voice. "I was wondering if you have some free time."_

_Polly knew Danny very well to realize that something had happened. She looked at her watch. What had happened? "I have half an hour free." She replied. "Where are you?"_

"_Home," Danny replied. _

_Something had definitely happened. "I have a meeting at the City Hall. If you want, we could meet at the entrance and we go to a nearby café. But you have to go right now."_

"_All right," Danny agreed and ended the call. He grabbed his coat and keys and left his apartment, running down the five flights of stairs to the entrance of his building and leaving, heading quickly to the closest subway station._

_Once in Manhattan, Polly was already waiting at the entrance of the City Hall. "I'm sorry," Danny said, "I've done my best to get here as fast as I could."_

"_We still have time," Polly replied with a smile. "Let's go, I know a café near here. It's cold."_

"_Yeah," Danny said, rubbing his hands nervously._

_With two cups of hot cocoa, Polly asked. "You wanted to meet me, what's going on? Don't you have work today?"_

"_Yes…well, I want to ask you something. I don't know, it's… it's nonsense."_

"_It shouldn't be," She said concerned._

_Danny stared at her. "My brother called me several weeks ago. He wanted to talk to me. It was strange because Rafi isn't very talkative, not with me, so I went to visit him an early morning."_

_Polly listened to him carefully. She didn't know Danny's brother and he hadn't said much about him. But she knew that Rafael had been in trouble with some drug matters and that he was in prison._

"_He asked me to look for some information in the file Social Services keeps about my family. I refused to do it, I didn't want to read about my time at those foster homes, but he told me it wasn't about me, but about my parents."_

"_Did you find what he asked?" she asked._

"_No, I didn't find the file. I made a call but it's obvious that they weren't going to tell me anything so I…I'm thinking about going to Miami." Danny said. Actually, the idea came at that moment to his mind._

"_What did your brother want?" _

"_He told me a story. Honestly, I don't know if I believe him or not. It's something completely new for me. He….he's not well, he has fantasies, some lost memory episodes, the drugs…you know. I didn't give him much credibility, but he asked me to look for two siblings in that file…"_

"_Stop there, Danny." Polly cut him. "That's a very common fantasy," She continued softly. She didn't want to hurt her friend's feelings, but her experience as social worker, had taught her stories about ghost siblings more usual than she would like to admit._

"_I know, I know, I also believed that at first but then Sylvia, his wife, the doctors from the hospital… they believe him and…"_

"_And they asked you to look for them," She concluded. "Danny, do you understand what you're getting into with this, don't you?"_

"_Yes…I think so. I don't want to do it, actually, but that's why I'm here."_

"_What do you need from me? She asked._

"_Several days ago, I called Miami and asked for the family file. They refused my petition, of course, like I told you. Then I did something, a stupid thing, it was something I shouldn't have done and well, this morning, my boss' boss came to talk to me, he was very angry and suspended me without pay for the next three weeks."_

_Polly widened her eyes in surprise._

"_I don't understand what happened because he told me that Social Services had called. Then Jack asked me about a guy…I don't remember his name now. I haven't heard of him, ever. But I got surprised because, what interest could anyone have that I made a call asking for my family's file?"_

"_Yes, I agree, Danny. It's all very strange. I don't know what your case is, but you must think that usually, those files contain sensitive information, reports, physical and child abuses, neglect…there are even people that changed their identity, or are under government protection."_

"_Polly, my parents died. It's only Rafi and me now," Danny reasoned, "unless Rafi was right about what he told me."_

_Polly shook her head thoughtfully. "What would you gain with that information? What do you think you're going to learn?"_

"_I don't know. I'm just accepting that remote possibility. It's important for Rafi. They want to get him into surgery for a liver transplant and I don't even know if I can help. It'd be…a last hope."_

"_You're going to answer my question," Polly said. "How would you feel if something happened to your brother and you didn't even attempt to find out if what he told you is true?"_

_Danny looked at her for a second and smiled. "Will you marry me?" He asked surprisingly._

_Polly looked at him and smiled. "You know that I can't marry you, Danny." She also knew that was the reason why he'd asked. _

"_In that case, I think I'll take that plane," Danny replied._

_After twenty-four hours, Danny had gone from going out of his house dressed in the thickest coat he had, to going out of a hotel dressed in jeans and a t-shirt._

_However, he wasn't in Miami on vacation. The Social Services' office in Hialeah was still there, but the twenty year old files had been moved, which he appreciated because walking through the old offices brought him some very vivid and painful memories. Trying not to care about his surroundings, he stepped into the modern building in the governmental area, and following the indications, he found himself before a desk._

"_Good morning," He began. "I'm looking for information on a closed file, from the mid-eighties, I guess," He asked._

"_Surname?" She asked, automatically pulling out an official sheet. _

"_Alvarez," Danny replied, thinking that such a common surname would lead to more than one file. "Mario and Sonia Alvarez," He added, feeling troubled. Saying his parents' name aloud sounded weird to him, something he hadn't done in years._

"_Fill out this sheet. If you know the file number, write it down as well. Are you family?" The young woman asked in an emotionless tone._

_Danny could have explained to her some things about the matter, but he concluded it wasn't worth it. "Yes," He replied simply._

_Taking a pen, he filled in the blanks with his personal information, his parents' and the file number he had found in a document he had kept at home. He stopped for a second, hesitating at the 'reasons' questions, and finally, he wrote, 'medical'._

_He handed it back to the employee, and she disappeared through a door after asking him to wait, pointing at the chairs he had seen when he entered._

_Some time later, she showed up with several files and called other people in the waiting room, but not him. Nervously, he shifted in his seat. The employee disappeared again and after a while she showed up with another brown file. She didn't call him, but another employee, older than her, working in other office, did. Her boss, Danny thought. She was the one who called him._

"_Are you the FBI agent who called several days ago?" She asked._

_Danny didn't know what to say. "Yes," He finally replied._

"_And you're family, as well," She added, before he could say anything else._

"_Right," He admitted._

_She opened the file before Danny. It contained a single paper with the file number, his parents' names and a note: 'Transferred'._

"_We don't have it. Some files were transferred to Louisiana during the nineties," She explained._

"_Louisiana? Why?" Danny asked annoyed._

"_I don't know, Sir. I wasn't working here then," She said, closing the file. She turned back and Danny remained alone. The young woman caught his attention and right after the old woman closed the door of her office, she approached him and handed him a card._

"_What's this?" He asked._

"_Don't speak aloud. It's a lawyer's. I know he's been working some cases like this…transferred files."_

"_Why?"_

"_Listen, we have the order not to tell some specific people any incident about some files. I don't know why, but it works like that. We also have the order to deny any information without those peoples' authorization."_

"_I don't think there's anyone interested in my family's file, except my brother or me. And he hasn't asked," Danny said._

"_I don't mean you, Mr. Taylor. I can't tell you anything else; my boss has all that information. The files are here, not in Louisiana. You can save the trip. But this man," She continued pointing at the card, "He has gotten other people to see the files. I think you should contact him."_

"_But, what interest can there be…?" Danny stopped as the young woman's came out of her office and headed toward them. _

"_Jennifer," She called. She smiled at Danny before turning back. "He wanted to know Louisiana's Social Services address," She explained._

_And Danny left._

_When he told Polly the story, she found it very strange. "There's something irregular, Danny. That's not the logical procedure. What's the name of that lawyer she gave you?"_

"_Lukas Wyler, the card says. There's not an address, just a cell phone. Do you think I should call? I don't know, Polly, this is very uncomfortable and I don't know if it's worth it. I don't know what to think."_

"_I'll do some investigating for you. I'll call you if I find something out. Maybe he's a specialized lawyer. I haven't heard of him but maybe some colleagues know him." _

"_Thanks, I really appreciate it," Danny said. At that moment, he didn't find the courage to continue with that matter. He felt tired and confused. His experiences with Social Service never went well, neither when he was child, nor now. The indifferent many in which they were treated, as if they were just numbers and files, was still there. Even social workers were other people, at the end, they never care, he had never been important, he thought._

_Being in Miami, going to Social Services, saying his parents names aloud, seeing that empty file, made him relive some old feelings that, without knowing why, led him to that cemetery in Hialeah where his parents were buried._

_He soon found the two niches where his parents remain rested. He was surprised that he still remembered where that place was. He hadn't taken anything, neither flowers nor words, only confusion. Years ago, it was the remorse, the guilt and the images of those last tragic moments. Now, twenty years later, nothing had changed. His father yelling at his mom and he sat down in the back of the car…he could have stayed quiet. But he had to open his mouth, what had he been thinking! Was it that he was going to get his father to stop yelling? Yeah, right. That was what he got from his father, to turn around to slap him in the face. But he didn't get to hit him, the movement made the car take a sharp turn and lose control. When it stopped spinning, his mother was dead and his dying father looked at him, with his shirt covered in blood._

_He tried to remove those images from his mind and made an effort to go further back, trying to remember any reference to those siblings Rafi had fantasized about. It couldn't be, he wasn't a baby anymore, and he would have remembered something. His mother wouldn't keep such a secret for so long, or Rafi. But he didn't find any. 'It has to be a lie', He concluded, feeling relieved._

_He left feeling better, fearful of the coming darkness, fearful of not being able to confront the threatening temptations, ready to remind him of who he was. 'Damn it, Rafi,' He thought. It was always him, his brother, who made him remember how easy it was to return back to the hell where he'd been._

_After a long walk through the streets decorated in beautiful Christmas decorations and full of people, he ended up, finally, back in his room at the hotel with a pizza and a bottle of water he had bought on his way back. He didn't go out; he didn't stop by the restaurant or the bar. One pizza, one bottle of water and Raymond Coleman, who he was talking to for two long hours, before the tiredness and sleep, got him._

_He had four days ahead, Danny thought the next morning, right after opening his eyes. But he didn't have anything to do in Miami._

_A glance outside brought him the sunny day and blue sky that was missing in New York. The proximity of the beaches and walks, the soft movement of the waves, attracted him in a way he couldn't explain._

_Even though he hadn't taken any swimming clothes, he figured that wasn't a problem at all. He could easily find in any of the numerous shops along the walks close to the beaches, everything he could need._

_Danny began walking on the seashore, burying his feet deeply in the sand. After a while, he remained quiet and let the sea, as it moved, buried his feet even more deeply into the soft sand. As he observed the soft movement of the seawater, Danny found himself so relaxed and at peace, a feeling he hadn't experienced for a long time. Stepping back, he set down his towel and sat on the sand. For a long time, he stayed enjoying the tranquility that the sea made him feel and finally he rested on the towel and closed his eyes. The murmur of the people, the smell of the marine salt and the soft sound of the waves almost made him fall deeply asleep, if it hadn't been because of a group of kids who decided to play with the wet sand near him._

_Sitting up, he remained looking at them for a while, bringing back childhood memories with his parents and Rafi, when he was still so young and innocent of what was wrong in his family._

_He knew that even though the pleasure of the moment was great, it couldn't last too long. Close to noon, he picked up his things and began walking back to his hotel, realizing on his way that he had left his cell phone in his room._

_He had barely eaten anything and his stomach began to protest. Danny thought about the missing calls, about the quietness of the beach, the idle people walking around, or not that idle….the vision you've got when you're on vacation…except he wasn't there on vacation. He had been suspended and he was there for a specific reason. _

_But he decided to let it all go. For the first time in a long time, he felt good. Who would have thought that of the place he had promised to never return to after causing him so much pain?_

_In a nearby restaurant, Danny let all of his problems go and enjoyed a quiet day, a rest he really needed._

_When he returned to the hotel later that evening, after a comfortable swim, his cell phone had registered several missing calls. Polly, Raymond, Martin, Sylvia._

_He didn't want to call any of them at the moment. Lying on the bed, he thought about what he had felt that day and he realized that somehow, it was like reconciliation; a reconciliation with himself._

_The night before Christmas Eve, when the plane landed back at La Guardia Airport, back to the coldness and the city that had welcomed him, Danny felt strangely burdened by the contrast of the two cities and the emotional experience he unexpectedly brought back._

_Then and now, his first call went to Polly. All of a sudden, he remembered the date he had agreed to help with the charitable dinner he had completely forgotten. He didn't know if it was late, but maybe he could go, he thought, glancing at his wristwatch._

"_Polly? It's Danny, I'm back," He said when he heard her voice._

"_Danny, I've been calling you!" Polly nearly yelled. He could hear the bustle of wherever she was. "I've found the information about the lawyer you talked to me about!"_

"_Great," He replied. "Hey, I'm so sorry. I had forgotten that I was going to help you tonight. Am I late?"_

"_You have to be tired, Danny. You better forget about it and we'll talk tomorrow." Polly looked around. They were still covering the tables with tablecloths and the van with plates and cutlery was arriving in several minutes. In the kitchen, big pots contained soups and stews which were cooking._

"_No, I'm not tired," Danny replied. "Tell me where you're. I'll go in a moment."_

…

_The first rays of sunlight on Christmas day entered shyly through the window and reached the room. Polly Mathews turned around when she felt the sunlight on her face. Sleepy, she felt her way around and looked for Danny's face, Danny who was resting beside her. He protested a bit before turning to her and lazily, he opened his eyes. The night had been long and definitely different from other years, where Danny shared work with old feelings he kept back and tried to enjoy the moments._

_But Miami had calmed down his soul…and Polly was beside him. They had finished late in a long day of putting up and taking down Christmas decorations, preparing the tables, welcoming the people that went to the Center, sharing dinner all together…people were coming and going all night and at the end, only a few people stayed behind to clean everything._

_At four-thirty in the morning, they had finished cleaning and threw the bags in the garbage can. Once they closed the door of the Center, Danny and Polly stayed alone._

"_Thanks Danny, for everything," Polly said with a smile. "You've got to be exhausted, just coming back and…"_

"_It's been great," He said smiling. Looking at his wristwatch, he added, "It's already Christmas Eve. It's cold and…"_

_He was going to add something but he found Polly's lips on his and that caused him to instantly stop talking. Without thinking, he just returned the gesture in a prolonged kiss._

"_Your house is closer than mine," She murmured, barely moving her lips from his._

"_Yeah," Danny signaled for a cab and gave the driver an address. He felt nervous but happy. It had been a long time since he'd felt that way and he knew that being with Polly he felt sure and didn't need to explain anything. Actually, he didn't need to explain anything. Suddenly, he felt the urge to laugh._

"_Coffee?" Danny asked, as Polly headed to take a shower, grabbing a towel on the way there. She turned with her still messy hair, puffy-eyed and some lines from the sheets over her face. She nodded as if the tiredness didn't let her speak._

_Danny smiled; it was the least glamorous look he had ever seen on Polly. However, he felt like the happiest man in the world._

_Things became crystal clear that morning, after picking up some Christmas gifts for Polly's niece and nephews and sharing that day with her family._

_In the backyard of the Mathews' family, in a moment of intimacy, Polly faced reality, a reality that Danny didn't get at all. That was the problem. She had told him in the past and she had explained to him the reasons. Then he had understood, but now…_

"_Danny, let's not confuse our feelings," She said caressing his arm. Danny, with his back to her, observed through the window as the snow fell outside and formed a white blanket on the garden at Polly's parent's house. "We can't go ahead with this, it's not good for either of us," She continued._

"_Why not? Don't you feel good with me?" He asked, turning to her._

"_Of course, I do, Danny, but that's not a reason…it's not the only reason to make a commitment. My…my job can affect us, both of us. You know that and I do too. Danny, I try to leave my work emotions at work, but it's not always possible. I can't…I can't come back home and find you, I can't get confused." Polly tried to explain something with such delicate words, without her being misunderstood, but she failed, noticing the incredulous look on Danny's face._

"_Danny, please, don't misunderstand my words. Similar events you lived in the past affect you and it's normal. And that's my job every day. I couldn't…I couldn't talk about it with you," She continued._

"_What about my job?" He objected. "Polly, there are a thousand other things to talk about and do. Don't we enjoy each other's company when we're together? Do we even talk about work when we're together?"_

"_More than you realize, Danny. Think about it. Besides…" She didn't want to say what she was thinking; she didn't want to hurt him. "Danny, we have a beautiful friendship, let's keep it that way."_

"_Then, what happened last night? What happened this morning? What happened a while ago? Don't tell me now that it was a mistake."_

"_It wasn't…or yes. I don't want you to have false expectations, Danny. If spending the night with you has a different meaning for you this time, I'm very sorry. I thought you understood the situation." Polly began doubting whether the propositions Danny made to her, half-kidding, didn't have any of truth._

_Besides, she wouldn't say it to him, but she didn't want a commitment with a person who she knew had a troubled past which could cause a lot of complications at any moment. It wasn't just about work, it was about Danny himself. His past alcoholism was always threatening to break him down at any moment, his brother, his family story…all of the circumstances that Danny didn't want to give any importance to, but which had forged his personality and it could be, at any moment, a determining factor in their relationship. And Polly, who knew a lot about that, didn't want to take that risk. _

"_All right," He said after remaining quiet for a while, just a few seconds that felt like hours to Polly. "Hey, I think I'm going to go…"_

"_Danny, don't, please stay …we'll be okay," She begged, even though she knew that he would leave. She couldn't bear to let him go like that, but all of a sudden, she realized of her reasons were completely right. She was looking at him compassionately, something Danny hated with every fiber of his being._

…_.._

_Danny had almost forgotten the reason he had been to Miami several days before, the reason he had been suspended. He had forgotten his brother's illness, Sylvia, the medical tests…but on Christmas Eve, that afternoon, he received that call._

"_Sadly, the results of the tests are negative for the compatibility we need. Mr. Taylor, excuse me for asking you this, but have you suffered from any illness related to your liver?"_

_Dr. Trafford wanted to see him at the hospital where Rafi was hospitalized._

"_No," Danny baldly replied._

"_I'm telling you this because the biopsy showed some anomalies…maybe you've been under a very stress situation lately…"_

_Danny felt uncomfortable._

"_What I mean is that maybe there's any genetic component in this matter…"_

"_I doubt that," Danny replied._

"_Mr. Taylor, I'd like you to be honest with me," The doctor said, suspecting there was something else._

"_I thought that you were my brother's doctor," Danny replied, clearly upset._

"_Sadly, your brother doesn't have a lot of time left. I don't think he's going to make it through New Year's. I just want to confirm, after examining the results of the test you were under, that the treatment has been the right one."_

"_I understand," Danny replied. Rafi was going to die. "Can I see him?"_

"_Of course," The doctor agreed, who, realizing he wouldn't get any information from him, opted to end the consultation._

"_Danny, come here," Rafi said, nearly whispering. His deteriorated physical appearance had surprised Danny when he went into the hospital room. So thin, pale and missing all the strength he had portrayed during his troubled life, Rafael Alvarez was dying._

_Taking his brother's hand, Rafi continued. "I want to ask you a favor, brother. I don't have much time. I don't…I don't want to leave without having some time with my children." Danny nodded. "But I don't want them to see me like this, Danny."_

"_What do you want me to do?" Danny asked._

"_I think I have enough strength, maybe it'll be the last thing I'll do in my life, so if I miss some strength, nobody will notice. There's a park near here. I'd like…I'd like you take them there… Sylvia, Nicky and Natalie. Are you going to help me?"_

"_Sure, but…"_

"_You're going to help me to get dressed. It'll be…it'll be like nothing happens…what I always wanted," He said trying to hold back the tears he felt in his eyes. Rafi cleared his throat and blinked the tears away. "Are you going to do that for me?"_

_It was December 27. As the doctors had said, Rafi didn't make it through the New Year. That morning, the weather respected his last will and the clear sky let the sun's rays envelop them. Rafi and Sylvia were sitting down on a bench at the park, talking serenely, hand in hand._

_Sylvia held little Natalie on her lap, as she waved one of the toys she had in her hands._

_Nicky and Danny were now playing with a ball, after running and laughing over anything. Nicky had gotten along with Danny very well, who had a special touch with kids, maybe because he became one of them in those moments._

_Sylvia softly reprimanded both her brother-in-law and her son, but she finally gave up. Especially, when she realized what that image meant to Rafi, when after twenty minutes he stared at them with a smile as they played with the ball._

"_Help me to stand up, Sylvia," He finally asked._

_Danny and Nicky stopped playing and observed how Rafi headed toward them, toward Danny. He kissed his son and ruffled his hair, as he had done with Danny when they were kids._

"_Danny," He said staring at him._

_There were no more words. The park, the people, everything disappeared when both brothers threw their arms around each other.__It wasn't a goodbye hug, or yes, it was a reconciliation hug, peaceful, a feeling so similar to the one Danny had felt during his stay at the beach in Miami. "I'm so sorry, Danny. Forgive me for all the pain I've caused you." Rafi muttered. _

"_Rafi, don't…" Danny started. _

"_No, Danny, let me speak. I don't have much time…" Rafi looked at him. "You're my baby brother, the only family I've had for most of my life…and I neglected you. I neglected you because of the same reason I can't go on now. No…I haven't been a good person, but…"_

"_Rafi, don't…" Danny started but, actually, he didn't know what to say._

"_I love you, I've never stop thinking about you and I've been very proud of you, even if I never told you, I admire the way you made it. Always."_

_Rafi rested his hands on Danny's shoulders and squeezed as strong as he could. "Danny, despite what happened between us, I realize now that I can leave peacefully, because I know that my children and my wife can count on someone with a big heart," Rafi paused, visibly tired and his hands relaxed a bit. But you still have work to do, Danny. Out there, there are two people that…"_

"_Rafi, don't…" Danny cut him off._

"_Don't interrupt me, bro. Listen to me carefully because I don't have time, I'm very tired and I'm not going to insist anymore," Rafi insisted._

_Danny nodded._

"_Out there, there are two people that are part of your family, Danny; people that are probably better than me. Look for them. Don't miss the opportunity of having a relationship with your family, our siblings. I know they're out there, Danny. Now, I know it's not a hallucination."_

"_Okay, right, Rafi. I'll look for them, but I don't know them. You're my only family. We've been living together, we know why and how we found our ways to here, Rafi."_

"_You look for them."_

_And Danny knew that he had to look for them although they only existed in the sick mind of his brother._

…

"_In Miami?" Sylvia exclaimed._

_Danny shrugged his shoulders. "It's what it says here," He replied pointing at the paragraph in the document he had in his hands. "He wants to be buried in Miami."_

"_I can't believe it," Sylvia, still exhausted over the last events, now had to deal with taking Rafi's remains to Miami. "How am I going to do that?"_

"_It looks like Rafi had some savings, an insurance…they will cover the expenses," Danny explained._

"_Did you know anything about this?" She asked._

"_No, I didn't," Danny replied. "Sylvia, don't worry, I'll go with you. We'll go, all of us. The kids are on vacation and I…"_

"_Your job?" She asked._

"_I've got some vacation time," He lied. "Don't worry; I'll take care of everything. And we'll celebrate the New Year in Miami." He added. "Come on, Sylvia, it's his will and I'm sure that Rafi didn't want you to feel sad for him, or for the kids."_

"_You don't have a clue," She muttered, as the tears rolled down her cheeks. Danny took her hands and pulled her toward him, feeling the warmth he could give her, would help her to find some comfort. Would he be able to share with her the places he had shared with Rafi when they were kids? The effects from his recent visit to Miami had caused in him still enveloped him and somehow, he wished to dip his feet in the soft sand and let the sea let bury them deeper in it._

_End of flashback_


	5. Chapter 5

BREAKING THE RULE

Chapter 5

"He came back from Washington like that," It was Sam who was talking, as she prepared a mug of coffee. Sitting down beside Danny, Sam had observed the tension between her two friends. "I wonder if he's relapsed," She said worried.

Danny looked at her but didn't say anything. However, he finished his already cold coffee and stood up.

Sam realized she hadn't asked him anything. "What about you? I see you took a vacation…I say that by the look of your tanned skin," She smiled.

"I'm fine, back at work." He replied quietly. "Listen Sam, I don't…I don't want to talk about what happened. I don't know what Jack told you, but…"

"That's okay," She said. "Jack only told us that Olczyk suspended you because you did a stupid thing," She paused, "But three weeks…that's too excessive."

"Maybe," Danny grimaced. He could tell her about Martin's theories, but he didn't. "Now I have tons of paperwork," He said waving the files Jack had given to him.

"I can imagine," She said smirking. "I'm glad you're back, we missed you."

"Of course," He said and they burst into laughter.

Observing them going into the bullpen so nonchalantly, made Martin think that maybe he had managed the issue wrongly. But it was something that tortured his mind ever since he came back from Washington and learned about what had happened. Now, it was the question that Danny had asked him, what disturbed him a great deal. Did he consider Danny guilty of what had happened during the ambush, of coming away from it, unharmed, while he was still secretly treating the consequences of it?

When he returned, he'd tried to find him to talk. But it had been impossible. Danny didn't answer his calls or the messages he left in the voicemail and Raymond didn't know anything either, so they were worried. When Jack told them about the suspension, Martin's worries increased. Not seeing him attending the AA meetings, he had passed by Danny's home but nobody opened the door. Finally, he forgot why he wanted to talk to him and only worried more, until that morning, when he saw Danny going into Jack's office.

Then, his worry mixed with anger and the wish to clarify matters. He didn't doubt, after hearing his father's conversation with someone on the phone, that Danny's suspension had something with it and he couldn't help but think about the bad consequences of the ambush, although it'd happened more than a year ago, had on him.

…

Sarah collected the files she had been reading, after deciding that it would be better talk to Jack Malone in his office, instead of denying his request by phone, an action that wouldn't have been welcomed. A denial for action that, if they did, it could be a problem during a future trial with consequences nobody wanted. The suspicions over the guy were clear, but they still needed to be careful obtaining any evidence, even if it wasn't what they'd wish. In these cases, if it was possible, Sarah liked to give some alternatives that maybe they hadn't considered before. She could seem pretentious, but she preferred it that way, rather than a simple '_you can't do it_'.

Then, she remembered that she had to meet Agent Johnson about the trial that would take place three days later. She liked to go over the documents and have everything under control before confronting the defense attorneys and the way which they twisted the facts.

Martin Fitzgerald was going to be called to give a statement during that trial. So, after talking to Malone, she headed toward the desk where Martin observed his colleagues coming back to the bullpen, smiling and talking.

Sarah stopped in front of him and laughed at his absentmindedness. Her friend was completely distracted and he didn't even see her approaching. She could have said a joke but being at work, Sarah usually kept the professionalism and kept distances her job demanded.

"Agent Fitzgerald," She called Martin's attention.

He blinked and Sarah would have sworn that he'd blushed before greeting her. "Hey."

Sam and Danny, witnessing the situation, exchanged a look and Sam couldn't help but laugh. However, Danny just frowned, sat down in his seat and opened the file that Jack had given to him.

Sarah smiled. "Do you remember that we need to go over this? The trial is next Thursday," She explained.

Martin looked around as if searching for someone. "Vivian, Agent Johnson, is not here at the moment. But, if you want, we can go over it together," He offered.

"Can you do it now? It'd be great," She agreed.

"Sure, but let's go someplace else," Martin said.

"What about your holidays?" She asked. "Did you visit your parents?"

"Yes," He replied with a grimace. She smiled. "I see there are things that never change. As the years go by, they still try us as if we were their little treasures. I just hope that I don't make the same mistake with Timmy."

"Yeah, you know, everything I do isn't enough for my father. He's stubborn and insists that I should leave the FBI field office. He wants me to go to Washington. He says that I'm ruining my career here," Martin commented.

"And it's not like that," She said.

"Of course not. Being here is the best thing that's happened to me in years. I feel valued, both professionally and personally. I've got good friends and much more attention from them."

"Don't they feel intimidated by the fact that you're the Deputy Director's son?" She asked.

"No, it intimidates me, actually. Every time he shows up, I wonder if he's here judging Jack's work or all of our work, just because of the fact that I'm working here."

"Oh, well, don't be hard on him," She said.

"I'm not sure, at all," Martin stopped; he didn't feel comfortable having that conversation, not even with Sarah, who he knew since they were kids. "What about you, what did you do?"

"I stayed in New York. Mom, dad and Matt came to stay with us. Matt's daughter, Silvina, has grown up a lot and she's absolutely beautiful! She's got Matt's blue eyes and her mom's tanned skin, it's a stunning combination."

"I can imagine," Martin said. He didn't know Matt much, the younger brother of Sarah and Will, but he remembered the resemblance with their mom, Ingrid, whose Nordic characteristics Matt had inherited. "What about your parents?" Martin asked, noticing that she hadn't mentioned Will.

"Old. I notice them…fragile, especially mom," She replied with a sad tone. "Dad's going to retire and he's going to let Matt take the reins of the Foundation. It'll happen in a few months, officially, but in actuality, Matt has been working there for years. Dad wants to spend more time with mom. He is also worried about her. But, well, that's the life, I guess," She sighed.

"Yeah, sure," Martin agreed. He didn't dare ask about Will, noticing that Sarah had decided to end that little personal chat. She opened the file with the statements that they had to work on and corroborate during the trial, three days later.

…..

"Danny?" Sylvia exclaimed on the other end of the line. "I've got it…the transfer, we're leaving after summer," Her voice was filled with a mix of happiness and nervousness.

Four months had passed since Rafi's death and the journey to Miami. Since then, Sylvia had been thinking about the possibility of leaving New York and moving with her family to Miami.

At first, Danny had been very close to them and he had been a good support that Sylvia welcomed. But then, the routine and different lifestyle made them go back to what it had been before. Sylvia looked for her closer family, her brother, her sister-in-law and Danny visited her any day he had a free time.

Leaving to Miami meant leaving everything behind. Even if it was unreasonable, Miami was the place where her husband's remains rested, and not wanting to admit it, Danny had done a great job, walking with her and the kids to all those places where, during his childhood, he had spent his best moments with Rafi.

"Really!" Danny exclaimed surprised. Although he knew about Sylvia's idea, he didn't believe that she would follow through like she'd told him. "I'm happy for you, really. But, listen, are you sure? I mean…your family is here…"

"I'll be okay, Danny. I'm sure it's where I want to live. It's partly your fault, you know that."

"Well, it's not the same visiting Miami for a week, on holidays, like we stayed, Sylvia…"

"Danny, I won't regret it and you're not going to make me change my mind. It's late for that, but…" Sylvia hesitated, "…we have time to say goodbye and well, that's not the end…you know that Nicky and Natalie love you so much. I won't let them forget their father's brother that easily."

Danny smiled. "Thanks, you know that I don't deserve so much,"

"Nonsense, of course you do. Hey, I have to go. I'll call you," She said.

"All right, bye."

Danny hung up with the feeling of living the last minutes of an era in his life. And that's what he was thinking about when Vivian came up to him and brought him back to reality.

While Sam and Jack were driving to the school, Vivian and Danny arrived at the house where Laura Collins was living with her five year old daughter, Vanessa. The school Principal had called Social Services after she learned that the child had failed to show up for school for a week. When they attempted to contact the mother, they hadn't found either of them. The family's background had made them expect the worst and now eight days later, since their disappearance, things were difficult for Jack Malone and his team, who from the beginning of the investigation, felt hopeless about the case.

Mrs. Collins' landlord opened the door of the house and Danny and Viv went in. Closing the door, Danny greeted the landlord with a smile, who they didn't want around.

The house seemed to be in order, although they could notice that nobody had been living there for days. The dirty plates and spoiled food still on the table showed that whoever had been there had left quickly. Was Laura Collins running away from someone or something? In the bedrooms, the dressers were empty and some clothes had been left behind on the bed, as if someone was in a hurry to pack their bags. While Vivian continued searching the house, Danny pushed the voicemail button on the answering machine. Several calls from the school confirmed the Principal's version, but then, the message of a male voice with an address caught Danny's attention. The way he said "I hope this is not another trick from you. I'm not going to give you more money," made him to conclude the man was the child's father.

"Vivian, I've got an address for the father," He said as he wrote it down. The house didn't give them any further information, so Danny and Vivian headed quickly to the address the supposed husband had left in the voicemail, a two-story house in a residential area, in Queens.

Both agents approached carefully and knocked on the door. Nobody opened, nothing was heard. Walking around the house, they didn't observe anything strange or saw anybody.

"They aren't here," Viv concluded.

"Aren't we going to go in?" Danny asked anxiously.

"Do you have the warrant?" Viv asked.

Danny shook his head in disbelief. Even if he wanted to become a lawyer someday, right then, he hated all the obstacles that judges put over the investigations. He knew that if he went into that house without a warrant and found something, they couldn't use it during the trial.

Remembering Martin's friend, he dared to make a joke about it. "Maybe Martin can ask his friend Sarah Parker for the warrant."

Vivian raised an eyebrow. "Do those two have a history?"

"I don't know," Danny replied, as he dialed Martin's cell phone number. "Martin?" He asked as soon as he heard his colleague's voice. Vivian looked at him surprised. 'Had he been talking seriously?'

True or not, whether they were in a relationship or only shared a friendship, two hours later, which seemed like two days later, Danny and Vivian had gotten the warrant that allowed them to go into the house, which appeared to remain as silent and solitary as they found it.

Danny broke the door and pulling out his gun, he quietly entered the house, followed by his colleague. No sound was heard and they were clearing every room of the house. Nobody was there, nothing looked out of place. Pointing upstairs, Danny began walking up, where he found the first evidence of something being wrong; a bloody palm print on the handrail. He continued his way up as his heart started racing, focusing on detecting any danger and being especially careful in not destroying any possible evidence. He found the child's bedroom in order, another bedroom Vivian searched but didn't find anything and the couple's bedroom, where they found all the evidence of what had happened there.

Lying on the floor, with an injury to his head, they found the lifeless body of Tony Collins. It wasn't necessary for Danny to look for a pulse because it was clear that the man was dead.

After calling the forensics team, Danny and Vivian followed the leads that could help them find Laura Collins.

The only evidence they found was the numerous fingerprints they found belonging to the couple, some defensive wounds on the body and pieces of Laura's nails.

Jack's theory didn't help to find mother and daughter, but it clarified what had happened.

"Anthony Collins had a restrained order against his ex-wife, Laura. Sometimes the woman had been to emergency rooms with bruises that indicated she had been beaten, but she was always with her husband and never reported any abuse. The situation changed several months ago when she reported abuse on her and her daughter, Vanessa. Social Services took the girl into custody, opening a file and ordered the restrain order."

"Why would she go to his house?" Martin asked.

"There was a message on the answering machine. He was giving her an address," Danny reasoned. "That house wasn't the one they shared but it looked like a family home."

"It's his parents' house," Sam explained.

"It's clear that Laura doesn't have any type of relationship with her in-laws, if she didn't know the address," Martin concluded.

"Does she have any other family? Any place where she'd feel safe?" Danny asked.

"Why are you asking?" Sam asked.

"If Laura Collins killed her husband, even if it was self-defense, we can think that maybe she got scared, took the girl and left to a safe place. Martin, I want you to check out the credit cards. Sam, find out if Laura Collins had any siblings. Talk to them but carefully. Maybe they are staying with one of them," Jack ordered.

"What about friends?" Vivian asked. "We don't know the mother's friends, but frequently the parents of the child's classmates, are friends too."

"Good point, Viv. Call the school and get the names."

Ten minutes later, Vivian went into Jack's office. "I've got this list, Jack. But, there's something else. Vanessa's teacher remembered that the girl was missing classes lately. She has a birth defect with her kidneys and they're waiting for a transplant…."

"Maybe she was being prepared for that transplant," Jack said worriedly.

"What if that's the reason she contacted and agreed to meet the father? A desperate mother could be capable of doing something like that…" Viv added. "It'd explain the meeting in that house."

"But, why did it end badly?" Jack wondered. "Call the hospital and see if they can give you any useful information and find out how much time we have. Damn it, if she's trying to save her daughter, maybe she's in danger, more than ever."

Vivian left Jack's office just as Sam headed outside where nobody noticed her. She needed a moment of peace to herself, time to think and recover the control she had just lost. After calling a second time to locate any siblings of Laura Collins, her own memories got to her, memories of a secret she had never told anybody about and never would. They were memories that had caused her so much pain and had separated three people that never should have been separated and never confronted the situation.

_Flashback_

_Pedaling furiously, Sam moved forward through the woods as she headed back home. It was already dark and she could see the light on in the nearby shed. As she approached, she also heard the screams, screams that her mother didn't hear from home. It was her sister, Emily. Leaving the bicycle, she ran toward the shed. A horrific scene left her paralyzed. Her sister was lying on the floor, unable to move, as she was brutally sexually assaulted by the man with whom they shared dinner every day. A wave of rage hit her and made her react. Taking a piece of wood, she started hitting the man with rage. She couldn't stop, not even when her sister started yelling at her to stop. They buried him four hundred yards into the woods. Neither her nor her sister nor their mother talked about it, ever. Sometime later, her sister left and Sam stayed alone with her mother, a mother that tried to ignore what happened. She began to let her mind wander and gave up on anything except small and trivial matters. Sam didn't forgive her sister for leaving, but years later she found out the reason for it. An undesired pregnancy, a son given for adoption. By the time she came back home, there was no trace of what had happened._

_End of flashback_

But Martin saw her. He saw her hanging up the phone, thinking, standing up and finally leaving the bullpen and in the manner she did, he knew his colleague was in trouble. So he followed behind her. He found her sitting down in a room that was used to meet the family of missing persons they were trying to find.

"A long time ago, my mom was living with a man whose behavior was like that. I'm sorry." Sam guessed that it would be enough to justify her lack of control.

"Sam, don't be sorry. We aren't machines. It's normal for us to feel certain emotions, especially when we work on a case that hit close to home and remind us of things that happened in our own past.

"I know that, Martin, but we aren't here to breakdown. We're supposed to be here to help and to try to make sure that things like this never happen again," She said.

"Sam..." Martin felt uncomfortable.

"And we're wasting time," She concluded standing up.

…

"And, why would she ask for the father for help?" Danny asked.

"Let's see, Danny. Laura Collins doesn't have other family she can turn to. Her sister died last year, her parents are very old…"

"What about the father's family? Does he have any family, brothers, sisters, cousins…I don't know…anyone?"

"I don't think that she wants to keep in contact with her ex-husband's family given the circumstances…" Vivian said.

"How's that, Viv? If she was able to contact the one who was mistreating her, she's able to contact the devil himself, if she needs to." Danny stood up and picked up a paper from the printer, about a search he had made as he talked to Vivian. "Come on," He said, waving a piece of paper with several addresses.

Vivian followed him. Danny was right. When they knocked on the door of Anthony Collins' sister's house and she opened, a noise from the backyard put them on high alert. Although she tried to stop them, Danny entered the house, went through the living room and headed to the place where the noise came from. An open window gave him an idea about where they could have escaped. Desperate, he went up to it, realizing that if he would be able to jump with a certain difficulty, Laura Collins or her daughter Vanessa wouldn't.

"Close the door!" He yelled to Vivian. He turned looking for them in that room. "Mrs. Collins, we're the FBI, we're looking for your daughter, she needs to go to the hospital, right now!" He exclaimed, going into every room, while Vivian interrogated the girl's aunt, trying to get some answers. She didn't say a word, but her body language her gave her away.

"Danny, she's in the kitchen!" Vivian said loudly.

Danny went into the large room and began opening all the cupboards where a person could be hiding, until he heard some sobs. Sighing deeply before carefully opening the door, he found mother and daughter hidden inside a small cabinet.

Danny stretched out his hand. "Don't be afraid. I'm with the FBI. Mrs. Collins, the hospital has found a kidney for your daughter, but it's very, very important that she goes there immediately."

Laura Collins lessened the pressure of her arm around her daughter and pulled her out softly, encouraging her to leave. The girl hesitated as she sobbed, while Danny offered his hand. "Come on, Vanessa," He said. "You have to help me, because I can't go in with you. And my arm is tired," He smile and made a gesture that relaxed the girl a bit. "You should come out first, so I can help your mom. Take my hand, honey,"

Vanessa hesitated a bit, before she shyly stretched out her arm. As soon as he could, Danny took her out of the small cabinet. "I want my mom, I want my mom!" The girl started screaming immediately.

"Calm down, Vanessa. Look, your mom is coming out, you see?" Danny said. The fear of the girl encouraged her mother, who resisted coming out of that small place. A lot of doubts still made her consider the situation, Danny imagined.

The bruises and cuts on her arms were evidence of what that poor woman had been through. Danny was aware that she would refuse to be touched so trying as gently as he could, he stretched out his hand to help her out of the cabinet, releasing her as soon as she didn't need his help. However, he kept visual contact with her all the time, offering all the help he was able to express. Her hands, her nails still had evidence of the fight she had been through with that man. Danny indicated a chair where they should sit down, always embraced by her daughter.

"Is that true?" She asked.

"We need to take your daughter to the hospital right now to continue her treatment prior to the transplant. Without it, she won't be ready."

"But you said…" She looked at him with confusion.

"I'll do it," The aunt interrupted.

Laura looked at her sister-in-law and then back to Danny, who made a gesture to Vivian. She approached and carefully took Vanessa. The girl had to go to the hospital but his mother's future was uncertain.

"Mrs. Collins," Danny began once they had left. "We've found your husband's body. There… there is solid evidence of violence and your fingerprints were all over the scene."

Laura started sobbing as Danny filled her in on her situation. He couldn't do anything else, he couldn't tell her that everything would go okay, but he tried to calm her down as best he could.

"It was an accident…"She began. "I didn't know who else to ask. The doctors told me that Vanessa was very sick and she needed that transplant sooner rather than later."

"I understand," Danny said in a comforting tone.

"I don't have any siblings, my parents are too old and my only sister died the last year. He was my only hope. I knew…I knew the risks but for a moment I thought…I thought that being his own daughter…" Laura looked at Danny, searching for an agreement for what she had just said. He nodded. "At first, everything went well. He told me he would go to the hospital the next morning, but then...when I was leaving…he didn't let me leave. He trapped me. I didn't realize until that moment where we were. Nobody was living in that house. We were alone in his bedroom and all the nightmares I had escaped, came back. I fought, hit him, tried to escape… but I couldn't. I think…I think I hit him and he slipped…there was a carpet, I think. He got hit with the bedside table…"

Covering her face with her hands, the sobbing didn't let her continue. Vivian had come back from putting the girl into one of the patrol cars and was now on its way to the hospital. She observed the conversation as she leaned on the door. Laura Collins was confessing to a murder and Vivian wondered if Danny had even read Mrs. Collins her rights. She feared he hadn't.

"Agent, I swear it was an accident," She repeated, as if Danny wasn't able to understand. He understood, too well.

He looked back at Vivian not knowing what to do next. He wouldn't be the one reading her rights or handcuffing her.

Looking at the patrol car with Laura Collins inside driving away, Vivian and Danny exchanged a troubled look. They had solved the case. Little Vanessa was safe and she would probably receive that transplant in a short time. But her mother…how was she going to go to prison? "It was self-defense," Danny reasoned aloud.

"Whether it was self-defense or not, that will have to be decided by the judge," Vivian said. "Did you read her, her rights?"

"I'm not sure if she listened to me," Danny replied.

"Danny…"

"I know, Viv, it can't be justified. She went voluntarily to his house, he was found dead, the law will have to do their job. Damn it, Vivian, did you see the bruises she had?"

Vivian felt the rage Danny's words meant and she knew the case hit him close to home. "Calm down, the law knows how to see those bruises also," She said squeezing his arm. "Let's go home," She added after a pause.

"Yeah, we don't do anything else to do here," Danny agreed.

Sam went into the bar, tired of walking through Manhattan's streets, without being able to clear her mind. She knew it was wrong, but at that moment, it was the only thing she wished. With the fifth glass, the barman suggested the possibility of stopping. There was another solution. She looked at him. His name was Brian, even though the next morning when she woke up beside him, she barely remembered his name.

That night, Danny didn't want to talk to anybody. He only wished for one thing stronger now than other times. So he had attended that night, although it wasn't Tuesday or Thursday, an AA meeting. Sitting down, listening to the stories of other people, he felt safe, knowing that nothing wrong could happen to him in that place. He was surprised to see Martin there; they hadn't met in a long time.

At the end of the meeting, Martin joined him. After the confrontation, when he came back from his trip to Miami, the relationship between them was becoming awkward, aware of some subjects they shouldn't talk about. However, the trust they shared kept their friendship intact.

"Hey, how are you doing?" Martin asked, sitting down beside him.

Danny shrugged his shoulders.

"A difficult case, huh? I'm worried about Sam."

"Why is that?" Danny asked.

"She was very upset about something related to this case. She told me some things…I don't know. Maybe I should have called her, but…"

Danny looked at the time. "Maybe it's not too late."

Martin hesitated. "Okay," He said, pulling out his cell phone. He didn't know if he was making the right decision and somehow, he felt relieved when he got her voicemail instead.

Danny smiled. "She's going to be okay, we all will," He said. "It's been a while since I've seen you around here."

"Me either," Martin replied. "I've changed my days, Danny. Don't get mad at me, it's just that…I don't know; it's weird to coincide here. Here…." Martin didn't know how to explain.

"I get it," Danny felt glad, in part, that Martin had made that decision. He also felt uncomfortable by his presence. Not at first, when he was helping him through the first steps of the matter, but later it hadn't made sense. "Well, I'm going back home, it's been a long day."

"Yeah, me too,"

There was something else Danny had in mind and it was the meeting he had agreed to have with someone he had completely forgotten and that case had come into his mind.


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6**

It was 5:00 PM when Danny left the FBI offices and, crossing the Federal Square, he headed to a nearby coffee shop. Although he could have met Lukas Wyler in any office in the FBI building, he didn't want to risk it too much. It was already a risk being there, in such a nearby place, where surely other agents spent some free time, but he didn't have enough time. Danny wanted to end the matter quickly.

The person he found waiting, surprised him. His intimidating body language and inquisitive brilliant dark eyes, contrasted with his unkempt clothes more appropriate for a homeless man rather than a man like that. Danny ignored that the dark blue coat was missing several buttons, but the shoes must have made a long journey, he thought. He was a tall and thin man, athletic enough for the ages the wrinkles on his pale face showed, Danny observed by his way of moving.

"Hey," He greeted nervously. "I'm Danny Taylor. We talked on the phone last night."

"How's it going, young man? How about we take a seat?" He said pointing to a table, where a steaming mug of coffee rested and Danny supposed it was his.

A waitress approached them with a notebook and asked if they wanted something.

"I want another coffee," Wyler replied. "And one for him also," He added before Danny could say a word. "So, what's this all about?"

"To begin, I'm going to tell you that I'm not sure if this is a good idea…" Danny began.

"It is, believe me."

"The matter is…someone gave me your card. I was in Miami, during Christmas time, someone had asked me…"

"Someone, someone, someone…Mr. Taylor. My name is Wyler, Lukas Wyler. What's yours?"

Danny felt ashamed. "Danny Taylor," He finally replied.

"First place or second place?" Wyler asked then.

Danny frowned. "Sec…second place," He replied upset realizing what he meant.

"Very well, Danny Taylor, in second place. Tell me exactly what you need from me, and stop rambling. Tell me names and facts. Don't be afraid. Tell me your story and we'll decide if we're wasting our time or not. I'm, for now, having a great time." Wyler smirked and stared directly into Danny's eyes. The intensity of the look made Danny blink without helping but feeling like a kid.

"All right," He began again. "At Christmas time, I went to Social Services in Miami, searching for information that, like my brother told me, should be in my parents' profile. It was information that I didn't give too much credibility to."

"Why?"

"Listen, my brother was dying, he was a drug addict and he had spent most of his life in prison. All of a sudden, he tells me a story about two siblings I've never heard of in my life, not him, not my parents. I thought it was a desperate plea. He needed a liver transplant and I wasn't able to help," Danny explained that all at once, he wanted to free himself of the pressure that he felt. However, he was surprised at how easy it was.

"I understand. Go on."

Danny was surprised when saw that Wyler took out a small notebook and a pen and he began to write. His careful clear handwriting, he observed, contrasted with the image that man transmitted.

"By periods, and forced by the situation, I tried, firstly by phone and later, as I've told you, going in person, to find that information."

"And it was impossible."

"They told me that the files were in Louisiana. The only thing they showed me was a brown folder with a paper with the word _'transferred' _written on it_._

"Aha," Wyler agreed, as if he knew what Danny was talking about.

"Well, the situation is that before that, something happened. When…" Danny paused, unsure.

Wyler looked at him and raised an eyebrow, something that Danny read as a warning, or a reminder that he had to tell him everything he knew.

"When I made those calls, before going to Miami…I tried to find that information using my credentials as an FBI agent."

"Of course, it's the fastest way," Wyler agreed with a smile.

"But I didn't find anything. My boss, following his superior's orders, suspended me without pay from my job.

Wyler didn't smile then.

"Three weeks," Danny added.

"What's your boss' name and your boss' boss name…you understand me?" Wyler asked.

"Uhm…Jack Malone and Alexander Olczyk. It was Olczyk who forced Jack to suspend me. Jack…he considered it unfair but he couldn't do anything," Danny wanted to clarify, feeling uncomfortable about Jack.

"Right," Wyler said, writing the names. "Go on,"

"One of the public employees at the office in Miami gave me your card and told me that the files were in Miami. She also told me that they had to communicate to certain people any incident about some files, and they shouldn't show them unless those people agreed. She told me that you had worked some of those cases."

"What else?" Wyler asked.

"Nothing, that's all." Danny replied.

"What you've told me, happened during Christmas time, we're in May, Mr. Taylor. What have you been thinking about all this time and why now?"

"Honestly, I gave up. No…it's something that was never part of my life. I forgot it, ruled it out. But, well, I work in the Missing Persons Unit and we've been working a case recently, a desperate mother looking for a compatible person to help her daughter. It made me bring memories back and…well…"

"You're alone."

The sentence Lukas Wyler had just pronounced, his eyes glued on Danny's, made him lose control for a second, before such a brutal reality.

"Yeah," He muttered.

"All right, let's go over the technical aspects I need and I'll see what I can do," He said as if he wouldn't have realized the effect that his words had on Danny. "I'll give you something, don't doubt that. Now, my question is, are you ready to find anything you would have never suspected, related to your family?"

Danny looked at him for a moment. Was that man talking seriously? If it weren't because of the respect he commanded, Danny would have burst into laughter. But Wyler stared at him, waiting for an answer and his expression was anything but comedic.

"I don't…I don't know," He finally replied.

"That's the right answer. Everyone who says yes is a liar. So, what are your parents' names, how many kids did they have, how many are alive, your address if you remember it, when and how did they die, where are they buried…"

Danny began answering as best he could each question that followed.

When he came back to the office, one hour and a half had passed, and more than one person wondered where he'd been. Jack thought it was about the last case and maybe Danny had called his sponsor. Sam had spent all day absentminded and avoiding visual contact, not only with him but also his colleagues. He knew her well, they had lived a relationship several years before, during one of his marriage crisis, and he knew by her gestures that the previous night had been longer than usual and probably the painkillers she had taken trying to relieve the headache of the hangover.

He didn't pretend to make excuses for her, but he understood that the case had been difficult for her, the same as it was for Danny.

Danny didn't have any more news from Lukas Wyler during the next three weeks, a time in which he spent his time searching for more information about that peculiar man. He found out that Wyler had been working for the FBI before becoming a lawyer and he had coincided with the current Deputy Director of the FBI and the current Director of National Security. Databases didn't show up much information about him, and just a few articles mentioned him related to an operation from seventies: The Kangaroo Operation.

"Do you work with Fitzgerald?"

Danny jumped and raised his eyes. Over his desk, the inquisitive eyes of Lukas Wyler expected an answer. Danny almost panicked. How the hell had that man come into the office like he was at home? The other agents were also expectant, judging by their curious looks. Lukas Wyler wasn't a person to stay unnoticed for anybody, whether they knew him or not.

Martin frowned, he had listened to the question and he wondered where he had seen that man before. He reminded him of someone, vaguely, but he couldn't find where from.

"What are you doing here?" Danny asked, at once.

"You haven't answered my question," He insisted.

"You see that I do,"

"And is he a fool like his father or he is smarter?" He asked, at the same time Martin blushed and Sam hid a laugh.

"The second," Danny replied seriously.

"Right, now let's get to our matter. Is there any place where we can sit and talk for a while?" He asked, looking around.

"Not here; in fact, not in this building. And today…I've got a lot of work to do… no…"

"Are you scared?" Wyler asked.

"Listen," Danny was getting angry. Wyler would have to leave whether he liked it or not, but he couldn't help but be questioned.

"All right, I see," Wyler cut him off. "Call me," And with no more words, he turned and left.

"What…what was that?" Sam exclaimed.

"Nothing," Danny replied upset. But all of them were looking at him, waiting for an answer. "He…he's helping me to prepare for the BAR exam," He lied with a possible reason. "He's a bit bizarre, I'm sorry."

"Bizarre is the least you can say about him," Vivian laughed.

Martin grumbled. He didn't like the comment that man had made of him. Where had he met that guy before?

It was later at the beginning of July, when Martin saw that guy again, in a place where he would never have thought. He had traveled to Washington, where his father was going to be honored, once more. It was a well-known secret that Victor Fitzgerald would be the next FBI Director, although Martin thought that Thomas MacAllister was in better position.

Sitting down beside his mother, in the first row, he couldn't help but feel admiration for the professional career of his father when it was introduced. Sadly that being his son, he couldn't feel the same for his fatherhood figure. When the assistants stood up and offered an effusive ovation to the FBI Deputy Director, Martin looked around, scrutinizing the people. It was then when he saw him, with someone he supposed was his wife and a young woman who undoubtedly was his daughter. "Alicia" He whispered her name as he all of a sudden remembered why he knew Lukas Wyler, the former FBI agent, his father's partner…Martin mirrored his father figure and he thought about his colleague, Danny, maybe mirrored in the lawyer Lukas Wyler.

He also remembered why the relationship he had begun with Alicia Wyler was sharply interrupted a few months later, in the moment that Lukas Wyler and all his family disappeared from his life. What happened between Victor Fitzgerald and Lukas Wyler stayed between them, but he never heard his father say Wyler's name again.

Seeing Wyler there, standing and applauding his father, seemed strange and even more so that his wife and his daughter were there beside him.

Once the ceremony finished, Martin couldn't help but join his parents during the snack coming then. That was what Victor enjoyed the most, so it was his opportunity to talk about politics, his true vocation.

He tried to talk to his father about Lukas Wyler because he was intrigued about his presence there, but looking around, he couldn't find him anymore and he opted not to mention it.

"Did you see her?" A familiar voice asked behind him.

Turning back, he clumsily exclaimed, "Sarah, what…what are you doing here?"

She laughed, "Saving your ass, as usual."

"Is it that obvious?" He asked.

"Nah, you do well, Marty. But I know you, I know what you think," Sarah replied. "Did you see her?" she repeated.

"Alicia Wyler? Yes, I saw her for a second, before. But…"

"I hadn't seen her in a long time. Did you know that my mom didn't like her? She said that Alicia interfered between you and me, can you imagine that?" Sarah laughed. "Have you talked to her?"

"No, I…actually I just spotted her. She was with her parents, I think. But I don't see them now."

Sarah looked around. "No, it's strange that they came by. Especially, after what happened between your father and him."

"Do you know what happened? They were best friends, colleagues."

"I don't know, but a few months later, Wyler quit the FBI. Rumor has it that he was working some sordid situation for a while…I don't know, I just heard. I know my father didn't like him either. And then…he disappeared."

"Why did you come by?" Martin asked, changing the conversation.

"I've come to visit my mother, she's not well and Matt called me," Sarah explained. "My father told me about this event and I wanted to come by."

"Oh, I'm sorry about your mom, you told me she wasn't well, but…"

"There's not much hope for her. I've called Will also, I think he's going to come any moment, I don't know. You can never expect anything from Will," She continued. "And I don't know if it's a good idea that mom sees him…it's been a long time…oh well. Listen, I'm going to pass by when this is over, if you want…"

"Sure," Martin agreed. Since he was a kid, he knew Sarah's mom and she seemed relieved to have a friend close to her. He wondered where her husband would be, Rob Parker.

Sarah stopped the car in front of the house and they both got out. Martin felt especially comfortable during their way from the assembly hall to her parents' house. Although he usually met Sarah at work, the closeness they shared, the friendship they kept along the years and the relaxing conversation made him feel at ease. Moreover, they came from a very similar family style and that made a special connection. Maybe Sarah's mom was right about Alicia Wyler, he thought. Maybe that was the reason he never liked the idiot Rob Parker.

Matt, Sarah's younger brother, opened the door. "Hey," He said saddened. "Will just left," He announced, with all the meaning it had.

"Did he leave?" Sarah exclaimed. "Oh, it's stupid. Did he say if he was coming back?"

"He told me that he had a meeting in New York and he didn't want to miss the flight."

"And dad?" She asked.

"They bumped into each other at the door. What a coincidence!" Matt grimaced. "Hi Martin, excuse me, I didn't greet you. You see, I'm always speaking about the family issues, I'm sorry."

"Don't be sorry, I'm used to it," Martin agreed, shaking his hand.

"What about mom, how did she react?" Sarah asked worried.

"Pff…guess…" Matt said shrugging his shoulders.

_Flashback_

_Matt heard the horn from the taxi he had seen approaching. Looking at his mom, resting on the couch in the living room, he noticed her quiet expression. "Someone's coming, Son," She muttered._

"_Yeah, mom. I'm going to go open the door," He said, unsure._

_The man he met when he opened the door was exactly the same one he remembered, the same tense expression, the demanding look…and fifteen years later. Somehow, he felt pity for him._

"_Will," He said, and smiled._

_But his brother didn't. "Matt," He said vehemently, before going into the house. He carried a small suitcase and Matt thought that maybe he was going to stay for several days. "I'm on my way to New York," Will explained. "Is your father at home?" He asked then._

_Matt sighed. The distance and years they had put between themselves hadn't calmed down his brother. 'Why was he there, then?' He wondered._

"_No, dad is not here, Will. You don't have to do this if you don't want," He continued worried._

"_How's mom doing?" Will asked then, relaxing a bit._

"_She's okay, quiet. Listen… give her some time, okay? It's…it's been a long time since she's seen you and…" Matt began._

_Will looked at his brother, who thought that Will would suffer a breakdown right there. "No problem." Will slightly smiled, which was a lot, Matt thought._

_Will headed to the living room, where his mom rested. Meanwhile, Matt, leant on the door, observed them, especially his mom's reaction._

_The expression of her clear eyes as she saw her son, gave a clear clue to Matt. She had recognized Will and felt relieved, he could see the happiness she felt, further than any other question._

"_William, my son," She said stretching out her arms toward Will. Sitting down beside her, Will took the senile and cold hands of his mother. She smiled, feeling his big, protective and strong hand. _

"_Hi, mom," He said softly and showing a kindness Matt had missed before. "It's been a long time," Will continued._

_Ingrid nodded. "I hope these years have calmed down your soul, Son. You were always very impulsive," She said. _

_He smiled, "Yes, of course, how are you doing?"_

"_Fine, fine…what do you want me to say…years go by, Will. I've been ill for a long time…" She said with resignation. "I'm aware that my time is almost over," She whispered. "But, tell me about you, tell me that I have any grandchild over there… Sarah has Timmy, Matt has Silvina…"_

_Will took a picture out of his wallet and showed it to his mom. "These are Diane, my wife and my daughter Victoria. She's nine years old."_

_She smiled and took her son's hand to her lips. She kissed it softly and Will swallowed hard. "Are you happy, Will?" She asked._

"_Absolutely, mom," He replied. "Diane is a wonderful woman, she's a lot like you."_

"_Don't say that son, if it would be like that, I'd had kept you close to me for more time than I got," She said._

"_It wasn't your fault; dad…"_

"_Your father has always had his personality, but he's a good man, he's done a lot for…"_

"_I know," He cut her off. "Is he still working at the Foundation?" Will didn't know why he asked that._

_She shook her head. "No, Matt is taking the lead, but your father is always around giving orders, you know how he is."_

"_Sure," Will said. "Do you need anything?" He asked worried as he noticed her grimace of pain._

"_I need my pills…do you mind? They are in the studio desk of your father, upstairs. In a drawer."_

_Will stood up nodding. "It has a blue cover…I don't remember the name, I have to take so many medicines…I know what it is by the color of the cover, that's easier." She added._

"_Listen, do you mind staying with mom for a moment?" Matt asked him as Will left the room. "It's just a moment. I have to pick up my daughter. She's in a neighbor's home. It's very close."_

"_Sure, no problem," Will agreed, with a quieter smile. Matt smiled him back. "I'm glad you came by, Will."_

"_Yeah, well…me too," Will agreed._

_End of flashback_

"When I came back with Silvina, dad had just arrived. I just exchanged some quick words with Will and he left. He told me that he was late to the Airport." Matt said. "On the other hand, I don't think he'd like to stay longer, he left in the same taxi that had brought him."

Martin grimaced. He felt for Will, but especially for Sarah, whose facial expression wasn't able to hide the regret she felt.

Martin greeted his friends' parents and a short time later he left, taking care that Sarah was feeling better.

…..

"You took a long time to call me," Wyler protested.

"Don't you dare ever to go to the office again or I won't call you anymore," Danny replied sharply.

"I thought that you were the one who wanted to talk to me," Wyler said without feeling intimidated. "I've got some information for you, if you want to hear it."

Danny loosened his tie, the heat was stifling and the air conditioner wasn't working. Wyler smiled with a smirk.

"Well," He said as he put a big folder on the table in front of him.

"What's this?" Danny asked, opening it.

Wyler put his hand on Danny's forcing him to close the folder. "This is a summary of all the official documents you can find in two boxes safely stored in the Social Services archive in Miami. This is everything you would be interested in learning about your parents and the information you're looking for. Take it home and read it carefully, take notes you consider and give it to me in the next forty-eight hours. That's the time you've got if you don't want anybody else to know."

"Who?" Danny asked stunned, as he tried to open the folder.

The steady hand of Wyler on his prevented him for opening it, once again.

"I don't know yet, but you shouldn't be worried about it if you find what you need, don't you think?"

"What do you mean?" Danny asked again.

"Forty-eight hours," Wyler repeated standing up.

Danny knew that he wouldn't get anything else from him. Wyler made the patterns of that craziness. Danny started thinking if he had done well in trusting that man who, actually, he didn't know. Maybe Martin knew him, but he didn't dare ask, especially not after what Wyler had said about his father.

He kept the large folder in his bag and he quickly came back to the office, where the air conditioner was working fine. The heat of the month of August was terrible.

The hours passed extremely slowly, as he thought about the contents of that folder. Forty-eight hours Wyler had said and he couldn't count the time that he spent in the office. At least they weren't working any case at the moment. He could go back home and read those documents throughout the night, although it was Thursday, one of the days he should attend the AA meetings.

"Hey, is everything all right?" Martin had noticed his distraction, especially since he had been back from some matter.

"Yeah, sure," Danny replied. "It's…it's hot."

"It's hot in the street, not here," Martin didn't accept the excuse.

Danny grimaced.

"What's that?" Martin asked, pointing at the pile of papers on his desk.

"Samuel Patricks' calls. I haven't saved them yet." Danny replied about the last case they had been working on.

"I've been with Wyler," He added all of a sudden.

Martin looked at him in surprise. "The lawyer that was helping you with the BAR exam…" He remembered what Danny had told them.

Danny nodded. "What do you know about him?" He asked.

Martin smiled. "Yeah, when he came by, I thought I had met him before but I didn't remember where."

"So, you know him."

"Not personally, but close. I was dating his daughter, Alicia," Martin said.

That confession caught Danny by surprise. "Wow, Mr. Fitzgerald, so you have a social life to hide," He said smirking. It was a sort of revenge. Martin was joking about Amanda, the woman he sponsored in AA, all the time, even if Danny always told him that there was nothing between them.

"It was long time ago, Wyler was working at the FBI, and he was my father's colleague." Martin explained.

"Really? Wow…"

"Yeah, something happened between them. They had a fight. However, my father keeps a picture from those years with Wyler and another guy…I think he's the National Security Director now, John Riley."

"So, Wyler's the black sheep," Danny implied.

"I can't tell you much, Danny. We lost contact. It was Sarah who reminded me who he was."

"Sarah…"

"Sarah Parker, you know who she is. Her brother Will and I, actually the two families were close friends and she was Alicia's friend. When we saw her in Washington, she reminded it to me."

"I know who Sarah Parker is," Danny smiled.

"Yes, well…" Martin didn't want to tell him about the relationship they had begun, after she confessed that her marriage had been over shortly after Timmy was born.

"It's all right, Martin, it's all right. I'm happy for you. You know that my lips are sealed if you don't say anything either," His colleague said.

"Sure…thanks," Martin replied. "By the way, speaking of that, I have to go. We agreed to meet in a few minutes." He looked at his watch.

"Yes, I have some things to do as well. I think that Samuel Patricks can wait until tomorrow."

Both friends picked up their things, one heading to the law section of the FBI, the other one back home, intrigued by a folder whose content would turn the rest of the day into a nightmare.


	7. Chapter 7

Jack stretched out his hand toward his bedside looking for his cell phone. Looking at the time he replied the call wondering who was at that time. The number on the screen was unknown to him.

"Hello," he said with a hoarse voice. Clearing his throat he tried to understand what someone was saying but the sleepiness and the noise hampered it. "¡Hey, I don't understand you, who is it?"

"Excuse me, agent Malone. I've just took your phone number from one of your agents who has you as an emergency cont…"

Jack sat up immediately. Sam was the first person he thought about.

"Excuse me that I'm interfering in a personal subject, but I think you should come around. I'm Mark, I don't know if you remember me, from the bar you usually meet…"

"Yes, I know who you are. I'm there right now."

Getting clothes quickly, Jack picked up the keys of his car and went out in search of Sam. What would have happened to her? He wondered as he drove fast. Fortunately, the traffic at that time wasn't to heavy at that time. A quick glance to the clock in the car told him it was 4.20am.

Holding him by the shoulders, Jack looked at him furiously. "It's been just three glasses, agent Malone," Mark explained. "But I know that agent Taylor never drink and the reaction he was having wasn't normal. You're his emergency contact in the cell phone so I thought that…"

"It's okay, thanks Mark," Jack cut him, still surprised as finding Danny in that state. "Come on Danny, let's go back home, right?"

Danny barely said nothing, just some bubbling words Jack wasn't able to understand. He introduced him into the car, praying that he wouldn't vomit and drove towards Queens. The fresh air in the night and the events had woken him up completely. What had made Danny going fall down like that after so many years of sobriety? He couldn't know. Thinking about the last cases he had been working he couldn't find anything relevant; maybe the reason was a woman, but it wasn't like Danny's behavior and throwing all his sobriety years for it; then he thought about Rafi and that was the best explanation he could think about.

With a certain difficulty, he went into the building and pushed him into the elevator which took them to the five floor. Fishing into Danny's pockets, Jack found the keys of his apartment and opened it. Switching on the lights, he took Danny directly to the bathroom, where he helped him to take off his clothes. He probably wouldn't remember anything the next morning. Leaving run the water for a while until it was almost cold, he make Danny enter in the shower. Danny protested something but he couldn't help but doing what he was being asked.

Jack looked for some clean clothes and helped him to get dressed before taking him to the kitchen where made him sit. Danny leaned his head on the table, as Jack put water to boil and looked for some ingredients to add.

Once it was ready, he forced Danny to drink a hot cup of that recipe and waited for a moment. The drink had the wished effect and Danny vomited all the content in his stomach in the sink. He probably would feel terrible but he wouldn't remember that the next morning either.

Once he felt better, Jack took him to his bedroom and helped him to lean on the bead. Danny, once again, protested, bubbling some words, but Jack ordered him to shut up. He stayed for a moment until Danny got deeply asleep. Then, he looked for a paper and a pen, and left a note on his bedside, beside a pill.

"_Eat this and come to see me when you're ready. Jack."_

He remained leaned on the door, to see that everything was all right and then he headed to the entrance.

It was then, when he noticed the messy desk before the tv. He noticed the opened notebook, the documents all in disorder. Approaching, he picked up a paper… what he read was enough to find the reason why Danny had ended in that bar and in that state.

He stared at those documents. What was that? And why has Danny got it? Looking at the time, he realized it was already time to leave for work, although a call from the office made him drive to a small share apartment where a student at the University was missing leaving the house like a mess. Her classmate had found the weird situation when she's back from vacation and after calling her classmate and not getting any answer.

They were on the field along the morning and now in front of the whiteboard they tried to figure out the last twenty-four hours in the life of Lindsay Murphy. Martin, Sam or Vivian had noticed the tired face of Jack, even though, focusing on the case, they hadn't say anything about it. They also had noticed Danny's absence, who they thought it would be in the office collecting information about the case and whom didn't find there around when they came back.

Short after half past two, they saw him going into the bullpen and as he headed to his desk, Jack pointed his own office.

Vivian shook her head and looked at Jack worried. Martin frowned and tried to guess what was going on. Sam was still looking at the whiteboard, trying to find any lead to fill in the blanks in Lindsay Murphy's life. She didn't had any room for more problems than hers, those ghosts that resisted to leave her mind.

Danny waited impatiently in Jack's office. Stepping around, his heart beating increased, as he punished himself, with all the insults he thought. His most angst problem consisted in filling in the blanks from the last night and, no doubt, Jack would do it. If not, how the pill and the note had been left on his bedside? Further than that, he didn't find anything that had happened after he decided to leave home and head to the FBI office, in search of any work to do and distract his mind. He remembered calling his Ray Coleman not getting a reply, and he remembered the moment he went into the bar instead the FBI building.

He felt ashamed and when Jack opened the door, he only could mutter a "I'm sorry."

"I know that," Jack said inviting him to sit down. His serious and expression and the bags under his eyes told Danny that his boss hadnt's sleep much either.

"Last night, a barman from Randers called me. You're lucky of having a friend in the bar because he knows you don't drink and he was realizing the effect of the whiskey was having over you. So he called me, I picked you up before it was you're in real trouble and took you home. End of story. Nobody else knows about this and nobody is going to know. You've been in too much troubles lately and I'm not going to add fuel to it if I can help."

Danny nodded, surprised by the benevolence of his boss. "I… I don't know what to say…" he began. He still felt the headache.

"When I was leaving your home, I saw the documents you had on the desk. And I read something of what it was right there. The perfect fuel."

Danny felt even more ashamed.

"You could have called your sponsor, me, Viv… it was the document you went to look for to Miami, wasn't it?"

"Yes, I called Ray, my sponsor, but he didn't reply and I didn't… I didn't want to be a problem to anyone else."

"It's not you're natural behavior to investigate about your family. Why is this so important, Danny? Is it about Rafi? Has he asked you something?"

Danny shook his head. "It's not important, Jack."

Jack hit hard the desk. "But, have you seen yourself?!" The shout made some agents turn their eyes to the office.

"I've told you I'm sorry, Jack," Danny looked down.

"Don't tell me you're sorry, I want you to tell me what's going on. What are you looking for in those documents?"

"Actually… actually nothing," Danny felt intimidated by his boss, who, stand up, had almost invaded his personal space. "It's been a mistake," he recognized, convincing himself at the moment about it.

Sitting down, jack just waited.

"I… I was asked to look for something. The doctor who attended Rafi wanted to know if there was family records about what was happening to him and I had that information," he lied. "So I… I thought that… maybe there was something written in any document."

"Did you find it?" Jack asked seriously.

Danny shook his head. "Not that, but…"

"You found the report I read in your home. Danny, listen to me," his tone was friendly again, especially as noticing the panic face of his agent. "It's a report, a report a social worker wrote. Tell me, honestly…" Jack knew he was risking in asking that but he hadn't any other option. "Along the years you lived with your mother, did you ever experience something that indicated something of what you read in that report?"

Danny was shaking his head even before Jack ended the question. "No, but…"

"I figured out. If your mother wanted to leave you, it could be a specific situation and probably angst for her, surely something she said in desperation, even wanting to save you from a hell of living. But take for sure that she didn't feel it. She didn't feel it because she educated you with all the love she could give you. Danny, it's just written words, expressions written in cold paper by a technician, someone that actually doesn't know about emotional situation of the people he was working with, and it can be misunderstood."

"Why do you know that?" Danny asked.

"I was seventeen when my mother… my mother killed herself in the garage at home. She had tried before," Jack said. "For a while, more than I ever wanted to admit, I had the feeling that my mother had abandoned me, that she didn't care about me. That was… That was a growing recurrent thought helped by the comments of the people around, but one day, I stopped and thought about my relationship with her, the way she loved and her relationship with my father and her surroundings, things she thought and I wasn't able to understand then. I found out the love and kind, I found some things that no one paper could hold. Don't let a report ruin your live, when you know that things weren't like that."

Jack's voice was firm but his eyes were brilliant with tears.

Danny remained quiet, thinking about what Jack had just told him, revisiting his own childhood and his relationship with his mother.

Jack would wish to open the drawer where he would find the whiskey bottle. But he resisted. Danny's silent helped him to calm down, as he remembered how that relationship with his mother had used against him by his Maria, during the divorce trial.

"I suppose I'll have to start again," Danny said finally. "You're right, I was a stupid to let those documents confuse my ideas. I think… I think I'll take them back. I still have time to read it, until tomorrow, but I think I won't do it."

Jack looked at him. "What about your brother, Rafi?"

Danny frowned and looked at him without understand the question until he realized that he hadn't told him that part, keeping it for himself. "He died. Last December," he continued before the surprise expression of his boss.

"You didn't tell us anything."

"No… I was… I was in real trouble. It happened as I was suspended and then… I let it go. I'm sorry, I should have tell you," Danny excused himself.

"Well, not actually. Will you be able to take the day without doing something wrong?" Jack asked.

"I… I think so. Jack, I haven't thanked you. I don't think I deserve what you did last night for me. I did a stupid thing."

"Well, we all do stupid things, time to time," Jack stood up and headed to the door. "Go home and do whatever you have to. We'll see tomorrow."

Vivian, Sam and Martin observed both Jack and Danny leaving the office, how Jack greeted Danny with a slap on his back before heading to them. And how Danny was leaving.

"So?" he said in a tone that didn't admit any questions.

…..

"The time I gave you is not over," Wyler observed, as he stirred the coffee. It should be his favorite table because Danny had found him there during the three meetings they had agreed.

Danny had picked up the folder and left carefully on the table.

"I know, I've decided that…" he stopped as noticing Wyler stopping. "I'm sorry, I think this is a mistake."

"Haven't you found what where you looking for?" Wyler asked.

"As you told me… I've found other things. It's… I won't get what I wanted and I don't think is good for me, do you understand?"

"Absolutely," Wyler agreed. Danny felt relieved of Wyler didn't question him after the time he had taken to find those documents for him.

"I warned you about it, Mr. Taylor. I asked you if you were ready… and you told me you didn't know. Listen… I have a certain experience about these matters and even if you are looking for something specific, you can't help but read, look and know about other matters. True or not, it can cause some problems."

Wyler seemed to know what had happened the last night, or at least, that was what Danny believed, who swallowed hard. Would Wyler be in that bar? And he didn't do anything for him?

Not wanting to, he was staring at that man, who he didn't know well yet. "Uhm… I'm sorry I wasted your time, Mr. Wyler."

"Don't be sorry. If any time you find the strength, we can try it again," Wyler said putting the folder into his bag and standing up.

Danny stood up upset and shook the hand Wyler offered. "We'll see," he said. With no more words, he left, leaving Danny and a cold coffee mug on the table.

Looking at the time, Danny realized it was 7.00pm, early for an AA meeting. But he had to call Raymond. What was he going to tell him? He hadn't feel so embarrassed with his sponsor for a long time.

….

Sarah lazily turned and stretched her arm toward her partner, but she didn't find anything else but the sheets, still warm. She groaned and turned again to read the time. 05.45am, she still have time for some sleep, but his absence in the bed and the certain feeling that he was still at home, made her wake up.

She wouldn't let him go without a goodbye. No way. Since the moment they were sharing their lives, every time that Timmy spent a weekend, holidays or some day with his father, Martin moved into her home or she stayed in his. Eventually, their relationship was beginning to consolidate and she wasn't upset about the comments in the corridors.

The relationship was recent but their friendship came from old times and very close. To Sarah it was like Martin was there around all her life, waiting for her. She didn't know if he felt the same way, but she felt happy of betraying her own promise, once she divorced from Rob Parker, her youth boyfriend, her husband, Timmy's father.

She heard the water of the shower stopped and soon the door was open. Martin, still half wet with a towel around his wrist, went out the bathroom drying his hair with other towel. "Jack called, I have to go," he kissed her and Sarah enjoy the aroma and soft of his face. "You always have time for a shave," she observed. He smiled. "I won't make them suspect, you don't know how they look at you when something is out of the usual, specially Jack."

"Really?" Sarah exclaimed. "I'd never imagine that from Jack."

"So, imagine, and what's coming next also," Martin added picking up the keys. "We'll meet later, right?"

Some moment later, the sound of the door being closed, welcomed an unusual silent, at least in her home. Sarah sighed, not everything could be perfect. Three days last to have little Timmy at home again, and she missed him.

She arrived at her office in the FBI building right to hear the shouting of her colleague Alan, who walked impatiently through the office with the cell phone on his ear. The shouting soon reached her when she identified the reason. A grimace as she looked at her colleague confirmed that it would be a complicate day. She should have to postpone the meeting with Martin.

She had to take several documents to her boss so on her way, she would leave a note for Martin, since she doubted to see him around.

Not only he wasn't around, but any of his colleagues seemed to have arrived and the whiteboard was silent and blank. The case should be very recent. A shiver ran down her spine as she thought about that moment, while she was writing a simple note for her boyfriend on a post-it and someone was living a complicate situation.

She was leaving thinking about it, when a familiar figure made her stop. "Will?" she asked incredulously. It's not she didn't recognize him, of course yes, but… it was so long time ago and… what was he doing there?

"Hi, Sarah," he said uncomfortably, not knowing how to react. Sarah missed him a lot and he looked so lost that the tears reached her eyes and not wanting him to see it, she approached and hugged him, as she let the kindness of wooden dark blue coat of his brother calm her down. She felt his hands squeezing softly her arms and pulling her apart. "I'm sorry for not seeing you the day I was to visit mom, but…"

"You had to left. Matt told me. How are you? What… what are you doing here?" She had so many questions to ask and so little time. Damn appeal, she thought.

"This is one of the reason, I've been sent to New York to lead _The Architect _here. I was on my way that day, going to an interview with the General Director," her brother explained.

"That sounds good, but… what about your studio?" Sarah remembered the when she had contacted with her older brother, he had talked about the studio he had in Chicago.

"It's working well, but right now I'm more focused on this. It's not exactly what I'd like, though…"

"Director of _The Architect_, wow," Sarah cut him smiling. It was clear something had happened and he wasn't going to tell.

"And what about you?" he asked. "Matt told me you're working here as a lawyer. That sounds important."

"No exactly, but I'm happy. By the way, an old friend is working here as well. Do you remember Martin Fitzgerald?"

She didn't know why but she felt the tense expression of Will as hearing that name. "Sure, of course. It's been a long time since I don't see him. I didn't know he was working with the FBI, but I guess it was what to expect."

Sarah felt sad not just because of the comment but the cold reception to the news. He and Martin had been very close friends in the past, until he decided to leave from Washington and put a wide distance between him and all his family, and his friends also.

Her cell phone started ringing inconveniently. It was Alan. "I have to leave, Will, I have a lot of work to do. But… what are you doing here?"

"Nothing, I've just come to solve a matter, nothing important. Listen, Sara, I'm glad to see you and so good." It was the first time Sarah saw him smile and at least he looked honest.

"We can… we can meet. Are you living in New York, I guess?

"Yes," he replied. "In Tribeca."

"Wow," she said.

"Yes, eh…" he was going to add something but Sarah picked up a card she always had, and taking his hand, put it on it. "Don't forget to call me. We have a lot to talk. But now, I have to leave."

Sarah kissed him and left with the hope that Will would call her… some day.

He remained there, waiting for a person he didn't know, not knowing well how to tell him why he was there. Finally, almost an hour later, the agent he had asked first, pointed him, at the time he spoke to other person.

Jack looked at him up and down and Will swallowed hard. "Excuse me," he said in a cold tone, but offering a hand that Will accepted. "We've got a case and…"

"I understand," Will said. "No problem." He tried his voice sound firm and didn't betray his nerves. If that was the Jack Malone of the letter he had read at his mom's house, the man could intimidate to unexpected limits.

"I've seen you work with missing persons," he said clumsily, as sitting down in front of Jack in his office. He felt like a suspect to be interrogated. It wasn't the best day for Jack, as the case they had started working was going on.

"I don't have much time, but since you said the urgency you had to meet me…" There wasn't cordiality in Jack's voice, but upset, and Will began to think about the absurd of his idea.

He took out the letter he had in his pocket and handed it to Jack.

"I'm here because of this letter you're mentioned," he began, as Jack glanced at it. "It's a letter from the Deputy Director of the FBI to my father."

Will was going to continue but he stopped as noticing the questioning and furious look of Jack as he folded the letter. He seemed just that was going to tear it up, but he just handed back to him.

"What do your father want now? Wasn't enough what he got the last time? What is he scared of to send his son and not coming and face me?" Jack stood up and was opening the door as he said those words.

Will didn't move. He was really angry right now. The questions Jack was asking just made him more confident about the reason he was there. Now, he was convinced he was doing the right thing.

"I haven't come by my father, agent Malone. I've come because of you and because of what you were investigating. In this letter…" Will unfolded it to read the paragraphs he was interested the most "… says '_However, the investigation started irregularly and on a personal side by one of our agents, nothing had to do with you, and he has been penalized accurately for using his credentials as an FBI agent. The Missing Persons Unit leaded by Jack Malone didn't have any clue about those facts, so you don't have to be worried about this anymore."_

Jack was still holding the opened door. "I'd like, if that investigation is what I think it is, your team continues with the investigation."

The door was closed all of a sudden.

"You search for missing persons. I don't know, maybe your agent… maybe someone asked him to investigate something and I… uhm… excuse me, I'm not doing this well."

"What do you want from me?" Jack asked directly.

"I want you to find my family." Will replied.

That night, in the half dark of his office, with a heat case and all his agents working on the field, Jack took a glass and the bottle of whiskey and poured a generous amount of the liquid. Stretching his hand, he picked up the letter left on his desk, folded, as Will Gordon had given back to him that morning. He frowned; Victor Fitzgerald, which it was strange, signed it. If there were any trouble matter, Victor wouldn't let such an evident clue. But it was clear they were talking about the documents Danny had finally found and that made him suffer so much.

He hadn't promised anything, not even he was sure if it was a good idea opening that investigation. He only told him that he would call him. If the documents were the same ones Danny had found, what did the documents contain to relate the Gordon's to Danny and Rafi? Jack folded the letter and put it into the drawer. He drank the whiskey, stood up and taking his coat, switched off the light and left his office.

…

"Congratulations," Danny greeted, tapping him on his shoulder. Martin turned with a surprising face. "Why?" he asked.

"This year, you put the star on the top," his colleague replied.

Martin didn't understand a word, but that Christmas time of 2005, he put the star on the top of the Christmas tree, right before Vivian switched on the lights of the Christmas decoration.

On year had passed since that day Danny had put a little card in Martin's pocket, since Martin had thrown the last painkiller bottle to the trash, since his first meeting at AA. That night, Martin would get his first medal, one year clean. That night, something else was in the meeting. Beside Danny, an enthusiastic and proud Sarah applauded to him.

Martin had been trouble in talking to Sarah why twice a week, he hadn't an excuse for his absence. Danny, as always, had helped him, despite of he never was lucky with the matter.

_Flashback_

"_Come on… why don't you come? You told me you loved that movie, I've prepared a dinner, Timmy isn't at home and you don't have to go to work tomorrow. That's perfect!" she protested._

_Martin shook his head. "I can't, Sarah, I've got a commitment that…"_

"_When you act like this, I think you're hiding something from me," Sarah was angry, upset._

_Sitting down beside her, Martin took her hands. She felt his hands cold and trembling. She started hesitating, worrying. "What happen Martin?" she asked._

"_Look, some… some time ago, during an investigation, we're caught in an ambush. Danny and I."_

_She nodded; she knew the story and what Martin had gone through._

"_I was severely injured and during my recovery process I… well… I got used to the painkillers. At first, it was normal, but later my body started demanding more and more painkillers. I didn't realize the trouble I was getting in."_

"_I understand," Sarah encouraged him to continue._

"_I became an addict but it wasn't me but Sam and Danny who made me think about what was happening to me and helped me to take the decision of moving on, but…"_

"_Are you still using those painkillers?" Sarah asked._

"_No, I stopped, but I began to go to AA meetings. There, I can find people like me, alcoholics, painkillers addicts… twice a week…"_

"_Oh, so that's your commitment then…" she said thoughtfully._

"_Yes, Sarah, I'm aware of this is not what you'd like to listen but I prefer to take care of it and think that it wasn't a casual thing. It was too easy to become an addict and I don't want me to happen again. But I can't promise, either."_

"_So that's why you didn't want to tell me…" she said and Martin didn't know if she was angry or not._

"_I don't want to lose you," he just said._

"_Then, you have two reasons to not giving up, those meetings and me. Go to that meeting, but learn to be honest with me. I don't like the surprises, I had enough with Rob," Sarah remained serious. She was worried, she didn't know well where she was going with that, their relationship had a short way of several months and this was totally new to her. Even if she loved Martin, she preferred to keep firm and doesn't leave the feelings betrayed her._

_End of flashback_

"And, how many do you have, Danny?" Sarah asked, as she observed the little gift they had given to Martin.

Danny didn't know what to say, but Martin spoke by him. "He has a lot more than me, Danny's a veteran, any day we retire him."

They laughed, and Danny didn't correct Martin of his mistake. It had been several months since he had lost all the medals from his eleven years of sobriety. But only two people knew that: Jack and Raymond.

"Well, and now what?" Sarah asked.

"No we leave back home, it's too old out there. What are you going to do these days, Danny?" Martin remembered something about a woman he met on Thanksgiving Day.

"Uhm… I'm going to Miami," was the surprising answered he said.

"My sister in law, Sylvia and her kids are living there and they've asked me to go. I couldn't say no," he explained.

"At least you won't be cold," Sarah said with a smile.

Martin didn't dare to ask for Rafi, but he hesitated the man would get a permission to leave the prison, least to travel to Miami.

….

"I think it's around here," Martin said, pointing the row of industrial units lined up. They were all the same, none of them could give them a clue about what was the right one. Industrial units set on the both sides of an empty street.

"And you say that because…" Danny said with a grimace. "I don't like this. There's nobody around, it's too quiet." He protested.

Martin raised an arm and pointed the locker and chains from one of the doors. Danny nodded, they were new, different. Carefully, Martin called Jack and Vivian who were on the other side of the units and pointed what was the one, while the backup agents took positions.

The accumulated snow at the entrance indicated, however, that the industrial unit hadn't been used recently, but still, they broke the locker and chains and opened the big zipper doors. Martin and Danny on a side, Vivian and Jack on the other side and a dozen of agents found a disconcerting labyrinth of walls before them. The ceiling of glass let the light enter and they could confirm that it was a sort of labyrinth that looked to cover all the space. "Close the doors," Jack ordered. Martin looked at Danny, he claustrophobic feelings of that place caused him a trouble he tried to overcome focusing on his job. In alert, all the agents were moving around the area on that place of walls and short ways. Step by step all they were separated. Apparently, there was nobody there; they only heard the sound of the agents and any pigeon flying around. Nobody saw anybody. Martin and Danny walked together, until Danny stopped. "Did you hear that?" he whispered. Martin thought to hear something too. Gripping his gun, Danny made a signal while he walked, going into a corridor, leaving a wall on his right that kept him out of vision from his colleague. Martin walked, trying to make visual contact with Danny, but in that hell of puzzle, he didn't get to see him. The uncomfortable bulletproof didn't help, he didn't want to move too much, thinking that Danny could show up at any moment.

Before hearing the gunshot, Danny felt the burning on his left leg and fell down without helping but scream. At the same instant, Martin, some steps behind him, felt blinded by the reflect of some light who didn't help him to see what was going on. But then he saw him, aimed and shot. Other gunshot was heard before everything went silent.

Martin ran toward the place where he supposed Danny was, and turning one of those walls, he found him, lying on the floor.

Approaching quickly beside him, he checked in relieved the bulletproof had saved his friend from a sure death. His shoulder would be in pain for a while but the bullet was embedded in the bulletproof. "You're going to be okay buddy," he said smiling. "Come on, I'll help you," he continued stretching his arm. The bloody hand a self conscious Danny stretched out, made him think that something wasn't right. Then he noticed the weirdly bent leg and the blood around it. "Oh my God," he muttered. Picking out his cell phone, he asked for an ambulance immediately.

…..

"Tell me what happened, Martin," Jack asked, trying his agent stopped looking at the paramedic taking care of Danny.

"I don't… I don't know, Jack, Danny had moved along because we heard something, I was… there." He said pointing the place. "Well, I think. The matter is, I lost visual contact with Danny and all of a sudden, I heard a shot."

Martin frowned. "Something strange happened at that moment, it was like… like a reflection of light, a flash and I saw someone, I shot and heard another shot. Then I ran over here and saw Danny lying on the floor and…"

"Okay, you saw someone… where he was heading for? What aspect did he have?" Jack asked then.

Martin shook his head. "I didn't see him, he was right there but then… I don't know, he vanished. Jack…" A terrific idea was forming in his mind and Jack seemed to guess.

Looking around, Jack saw Vivian approaching them. "Take care of this, check it everything. Martin, explain to Vivian what happened. I'm leaving with Danny to the hospital."

"How's he?" Vivian asked, looking at her colleague, who was attending by the paramedics. The blood pole around him, made her fear the worst. However, listening to one of the paramedic saying "settled" at the same time they raised the stretcher and headed to the ambulance, made her to have some hopes. Jack pointed Martin with a sight as he climbed into the ambulance and sat down beside unconscious Danny.

The doors were closed quickly and soon the only thing behind in that weird industrial unit was the rest of blood, a group of agents clearing the zone and a confused Martin. No trace of any suspect or the victim they looked restless since that cold morning of December.

Vivian, beside a shocked Martin, asked, "So, what do you have to tell?"

Martin shook his head. He remained silent, thoughtful. "What if I shot him?" he asked. His sight pleaded for a refuse from Vivian, but the veteran agent just looked at him before asking directly. "Let me your gun, ballistic department will tell that. Now, tell me exactly what your movements were and Danny's."

Martin repeated all his movements the best he could, including that blinded light he didn't know where it came from. Walking through those corridors, Vivian could understand the way Martin had lost visual contact with his coworker. From he was, one of the corridors separated by that sort of labyrinth walls, was out of sight. Suddenly, her feet stumbled into something on the floor. Barely noticed, a small pull-tab stood out. She bent and examined it. Then she pulled out and surprisingly a trap door was opened up. It was then when Martin exclaimed, "That was the light I saw!" She grimaced as noticing the brilliant metal of the inside. That was what blinded Martin.

Looking at the hole, she found out another corridor, but this time it seemed the labyrinth extended under the industrial unit. Maybe that was the entrance to the unit. Maybe there were more doors around. She asked the agents for help and carefully they entered in that new whole of corridors under the floor. After walking about one kilometer, they saw the exit, just in the limit of the whole industrial units. Outside, they were absolutely alone. "Damn it," Vivian muttered. What kind of place was there?

…..

Jack was impatiently pacing through the waiting room at the hospital. It was an eternity since the doctors had lead Danny to the surgery room and he didn't know anything yet. His cell phone started ringing and the ID told him it was Vivian. He only wished that she would tell him good news, but that wasn't what Vivian had to tell.

"All the units are connected through the labyrinths, Jack, and the story repeats under the floor. This is huge, we'll take several days to check everything. Moreover, there are unnoticed doors that connects the labyrinths… I don't know Jack, this looks like… like a huge board game."

The news were discouraging but the last words Vivian had said caught Jack's attention. "What if we're talking about that, like a surviving game or so…?""

Vivian nodded. "Yes, it could be, I'll call Sam to search if the guy was into any group, some role game… maybe there are more victims. How's Danny?"

"He's in surgery. I don't know anything yet. Investigate that, focus on it. I'm with Danny." Jack replied. "I'll call you as soon as I have news. What about Martin?"

"He was worried and confused. He thinks that maybe he shot Danny, but honestly, I don't think so. Anyway, ballistics will tell something in some hours." Vivian replied.

"Well, take care of him not doing a stupid thing,"

"Of course,"

The phone called was ended and Vivian wished to know something else rom Danny. She called Sam, who immediately started working the information about Ian Francis Vivian had asked.

Waiting for the results on her computer, her sight went to the Christmas Tree decorating the office and she remembered the funny expression of her colleague giving the star to Martin. What different this Christmas were going to be this time.

The slap on Martin's shoulder almost coincided with the slam on the door showing Jack's anger, before heading some place, visibly angry.

Martin observed the frowning gesture of Jack, as surprising he turned to face an old friend. "Joe Riley," he exclaimed unsure of what to feel about.

"Surprise, surprise, uh? You figure out. From Missuri to New York in twenty four hours. And who do I meet? My old friend, give me a hug!"

Martin remembered the strong personality of Joe Riley and he could see the years gone didn't soften it. He smiled a little confuse. "What are you doing here?"

"I've been transferred here."

Vivian and Sam exchanged a worried look and Martin didn't show especially happy. Before he could say a word, Riley continued. "I understand it's not an easy situation. I mean, coming to replacing a colleague who won't be back."

"What are you talking about?" Martin asked.

"Well, that's what I've been said… maybe I'm wrong. But well, I have to talk to a…"

"Jack Malone," Jack cut him joining them. He was heading to Olczyk office, but he turned back. It would be better to face the new agent first. "You come from homicides, I've been told."

The others were surprised that Jack wouldn't have interview him and the questions he usually did in his office, were said right there, in the bullpen, standing up and everyone being witnessed. The serious and distance he put in excess from that guy, let them know that Jack was only obeying orders.

"Yes… in Missuri…"

"Our way of work is very different from the one of a homicide unit, so if you're going to be here around, just observe."

"Excuse me, but I haven't come just to observe, agent Malone."

"If I'm the boss, yes." And turning back, Jack left the bullpen.

"Oh.." Riley seemed a little bit confused, but he turned to be the talkative man he had been. "So Martin, what's my place, then?" he asked smiling.

Martin felt upset with Riley attitude since the very first moment he saw him. The way he removed Danny's personal effects from his desk and put into a box, hurt them who were expecting their colleague would recover.

Vivian softly knocked before going into Jack's office. Sitting down in front of him, she only had to wait. Jack was furious but sad as well.

"Have you got some news about Danny?" she asked.

"Yes I have, yes. Yesterday, when I went to visit him at the hospital I had to plea for them leaving me see him."

Viv raised an eyebrow.

"They told me he was very tired and he needed to rest. It's been only two days since he was shot and two guys from Internal Affairs spent more than an hour interviewing him."

"And was he alone?, Wasn't there anyone else? Didn't you know anything?" Vivian wondered aloud. Actually, it was a very strange way of act. She couldn't help but remember the suspension her coworker had been punished the year before. "What did he say?"

"Danny? Actually nothing, he was really tired."

"Jack…"

"I told him the ballistic report was clear and Martin didn't shoot him. I don't know what he told the guys from Internal Affairs, but the situation was very confuse for him."

"Didn't he see anybody?"

"No, he only felt the shots but he didn't see anybody else but Martin running toward him."

"Do you think that Martin could be in trouble?"

"No, I don't think so, but I also think that they have sent a guardian to watch over us."

"Do you mean this… Riley?"

"He's the National Security Director's son, Viv. He's best friend of Victor Fitzgerald. Do you think it's just a coincidence they just put him here without telling me anything?"

"What about Danny?"

"I don't know, the doctors aren't very hopeful with his leg. The shot was too close, he's suffered damages in his muscle structure, the hip's bone… I don't know Viv. I don't know what's going on with Danny. I have to think about something."

"Have you talked to Olczyk?" Vivian asked.

"I was going to, but I preferred to talk to that guy first."

"What his profile say?" Vivian went to the practice part. She was the one who always got to calm down the troubles.

"Olczyk has it. He received it by fax, as he told me when he phoned me to tell me the news. I have to go to look for it."

"Maybe he's a good agent, Jack. Don't make into conclusions before reading it. Sadly, if Danny's condition is that, maybe he can't be back to work with us."

"Don't mention it, Viv. Danny has his place here, with Riley or without him."

"But…"

"I've told you I'll think about it."

Jack stood up and went out with Viv, who headed to her desk, as he walked to Olczyk's office.

Sam went into his office with the box where they had put Danny's personal effects. "Jack, we've been thinking… we're going to Randers to drink something before going back home. Viv, Martin, I… if you want to join us… I think… I think we need it."

It wasn't what Jack had in mind, but he realized that actually it was necessary. They were in the edge of nerves after the last events, and the concern about Danny's condition, made them being closer.

Taking his coat and the gloves, they left together and headed to the elevator. Martin and Vivian had already left and Sarah would join them as soon as she finished the report she was working on.

Sam didn't know if it was because the Christmas time or because of what happened to Danny or just the fact of being alone in that elevator going down to the entrance of the FBI building, she felt something she remembered from a long time ago. And it happened that when Jack took her hand and squeezed, they didn't need to look each other, it wasn't necessary.

Leaving the bar, he rounded her arms and let her to rest her head on his shoulder. Sam didn't want to cry but for some reason she felt very vulnerable and the tears were just a relieve to her that she couldn't explain.

"We can't stay together, it's a crazy thing," she said as removed the tears. Some time ago a taxi had left them in Jack's home, an apartment in Tribeca he had rented two years ago, whe he still was trying to take his marriage with Maria to a good place, a house that, after she and the kids left, was too big, cold and lonely for him.

Now, sitting down on the couch and feeling better from the recent events, the feelings had been appeared again, as they never left.

"We'll keep it secretly," he just said. "I'm tired of seeing how the people I love so much suffer because wanting to have some happiness on their lives. It's over Sam, it's over."

"And what about you?" she asked.

"I've been waiting for this moment a long time. But you were with Martin and… I didn't want to interfere. I'm aware of the pain I caused you and it wouldn't be right if I'd try something."

Sam smiled. It was along time she didn't feel as comfortable, relax and happy as at that moment.


	8. Chapter 8

His wife had been protesting all day, but Raymond Coleman had made his decision. He knew that his wife's reasons for protesting were well-founded, but he tried to reassure her.

"It'll be just a few days, until he can do things by himself. Danny doesn't have any place to go to be tended to the way he needs and we're here all day, you or me in case he needs something." He explained.

"I don't know, Ray, it's too much. You're his sponsor; you can't do that with all the people you sponsor."

"But he's the only one I'm sponsoring. You know him well, you've known him a long time; he's practically family. Come on Sophia, Danny's a good guy, he won't cause any trouble."

It had been Martin who had asked Raymond. Danny couldn't stay at the hospital anymore, where he only had to go for his intense rehabilitation sessions every day, but not live there.

"None of us are at home the time Danny would need and his sister-in-law lives in Miami. I don't know if this is right or not, but I don't find any other person I could count on," he had explained. "And I also think that having you is going to do him a lot of good."

"What happened?" Raymond asked. He had noticed his absence in the AA meetings and Martin hadn't had the opportunity to talk to him in the five weeks since Danny had been injured.

"He was shot. He has a severe damage affecting his hip. His prognosis isn't good," Martin explained. "Maybe it's the time to encourage him to prepare for the BAR exam he speaks about."

"I understand," Raymond said. "I'll talk to him, there's always someone at home, my wife, me or any of my sons. It won't be a problem. But I'll talk to him."

"Sure, thanks Ray." Martin thanked him in relief. It had been Sarah who suggested that maybe Raymond could help, when he explained the situation to her.

_Flashback_

_Martin had put all his energy into taking care of his colleague during those weeks, visiting him every time he could in the hospital and encouraging him during the first hard and complicated rehabilitation sessions._

"_What's behind all of this, Martin," she had asked._

"_What do you mean?" He asked._

"_Come on Martin, I work in the same place you do. Martin, I hear the comments, there are rumors…"_

"_And you believe them?" He asked frowning._

_Sarah smiled and putting her fingers on Martin frown, she separated the lines. Kissing him, she then replied, "Of course not, but I'm worried about you."_

"_Danny is my best friend, Sarah, and those things we hear…there's some truth to it, you know?"_

"_I don't understand you."_

"_Danny made a statement to internal affairs agents, and there are doubts about who could have shot him," Martin explained._

"_But the ballistic tests…"_

"_Yes, yes, Sarah the tests, the fact he was interrogated when he wasn't in the best condition, everything is understandable, you know, but…the way he looks at me when I visit him…I don't know Sarah, I don't know what he thinks about me. Maybe that's why I'm there with him all the time I can be. I want him to understand, I want him to break that wall."_

"_You haven't talked with him about what happened?"_

_Martin shook his head. "I don't find the right moment. I think he knows that his future isn't here, in the FBI, with us anymore. And that's very important to him."_

"_He doesn't need to work out in the field…" she reasoned._

_Martin smiled. "You don't know him; it'd be like putting him in a cage. However…"_

_Both exchanged a worried look._

"_He'll be discharged in a few days and he doesn't know what to do. He can't walk, he can't stay alone. I don't know anybody who could stay with him until he becomes more self-sufficient…"_

"_What about his sponsor? He looked like a good guy."_

"_Ray?" Martin hadn't thought about that. "Maybe, I don't know if there's any unwritten rule…"_

"_Come on, Martin, as a friend, not as his sponsor, I don't think that after all the years they have spent sharing the matter, he's going to be more than a sponsor in bad times. Moreover, it's probably one of the worst moments Danny's going to deal with," she said._

"_Yeah, you're right, I'll talk to him."_

_End of flashback._

**FBI Headquarters. New York, February 2006**

Jack stood at the bullpen looking at a concrete place, beside some wide windows. Nodding several times, he finally came back to his office. Other people noticed his gesture and looked at that place but they didn't see anything. Yet.

He hadn't talked to anybody yet but he had started working on two matters since Danny had left the hospital. He knew that his agent would show up any moment and he wanted to have everything ready for him. One of them had to be with that place he had been evaluating and it was difficult.

The second matter looked to be easier until the moment Jack started to find difficulties where he thought there wouldn't be.

Later, leaving the office, he observed with regret that Agent Riley was working well together with the team, especially with Martin, who he followed everywhere. But that little inconvenience wouldn't be a problem.

Knocking on the door, he didn't wait for a reply and opened the door of his superior's office. "Alex, we have to talk," he said simply.

Alexander Olczyk wasn't used to that kind of interruptions but he was used to having Jack Malone as the one who always caused the interruptions.

"Jack, what a surprise and a coincidence, we're talking about you right now," he began. "George, this is Agent Malone, the man we've been talking about several times."

Jack forgot what he was going to say, all of a sudden.

"Oh, Agent Malone," George Gordon said, offering a hand that Jack didn't accept. The man pulled it back with a disgusted look on his face. "I've been told that you're still insisting in putting a lot of families in danger."

"What?" Jack asked not knowing what that man was talking about.

"Let me explain. I'm director of a foundation with altruistic intentions, as you would know if you a look at the news."

"Caroline Foundation," Jack agreed.

"You should also know that I, despite my disgust about it, am the visible face of that foundation and my reputation is sensitive toward everything around it."

"I think so, yes."

"Then, you will easily understand that if anyone learned that the FBI is investigating George Gordon, the monetary donations we receive from thousands of anonymous donors that keep our foundation working, could disappear, right?"

"Maybe, but I don't understand what you mean, Mr. Gordon. If you haven't done anything illegal, you don't need to be worried about anything. And if you have, you shouldn't be worried either," Jack couldn't stop himself and Olczyk blushed.

"I've learned that you've been asking again for documents that nobody should be authorized to see, except myself, or someone authorized by me," Gordon continued as if he hadn't heard a word from Jack.

"I haven't done that. As I said before, we've never investigated you. Someone is giving you false information. I wonder, however, what those documents contain about you that you're so nervous about. Maybe your conscience is not clean enough about something." Jack didn't know to shut up and lately he didn't care what others could say about him.

"I can explain. I could explain it to the entire world and even if I did, my honesty would be put in jeopardy, although at the time and in the moment the facts written in those documents were perfectly right. In fact, the Foundation I created is based on what those documents contain. But exposing those events wouldn't help anybody and it would cause significant damage to the families who live protected under the help of the Caroline Foundation."

"If that's the case, you shouldn't be worried. If I've read well, Caroline Foundation is a solid organization in our country. I don't think that a past issue, that you could very well explain, would cause any problem. But still, I repeat, we aren't investigating you, Mr. Gordon. That's not our job. We look for missing persons and sadly every day we have any circumstance that keep us working on it, pretty far from your situation."

Gordon looked at him confused. And Jack took the moment to end that conversation. "Anyway, Alex, I'd need your approval to get a new office in my unit."

"For what?"

"I'm going to add a new member to my team."

"You're not going to do that."

"I will, unless of course, you want me to send your Agent Riley back to Missouri."

"Jack, I don't think this is the moment…"

"That's why I'd come here, not to greet your friend…George. Gordon."

Olczyk remained thoughtful for a second. "Right,"

"That's all I wanted to hear," Jack said and turning back, he left the office with a victorious expression…even though he never got the documents he asked Social Service from Miami, in demand of the investigation of the case number 45562, opened by request on behalf of William Gordon.

…..

It had been some time since Jack and Vivian shared a drive to interview a witness for a case. But Sam had stayed at the office and neither Jack nor Vivian wished to take Riley with them.

The long journey started with a chat about the case but after a while, the silence between the two veteran agents could only be about the unspoken matter. It was Vivian who broke the silence.

"I've heard you had an argument with Olczyk about Riley."

"You heard right," Jack replied with a sigh. "They stuck us with the National Security Director's son, with a fine excuse, and they want to fire Danny when he's still recovering."

"Riley isn't a bad agent," she began. "Maybe we should give him an opportunity. Do you really think that Danny is going to recover?"

"You're always on the objective side, right?" Jack said. "I know that Danny has a small chance to recover, physically, but he's valuable to the office. You know that, Viv." He paused before continuing. "You also know that a supervisor has everything to say in getting his team, I don't like the way they brought Riley to my team, as he was the best agent in the world. He also needs to have other characteristics to get a solid team."

"He looks to be friends with Martin," Vivian observed.

"They know each other. Victor Fitzgerald and John Riley were good friends and Martin and Riley have known each other since they were kids."

"Martin told me they attended the same school," Vivian added.

"I've been thinking, Viv. I'm going to ask Olczyk for a place for Danny, here, with us. I don't think is too much to ask after he imposed Riley on the team." Jack said.

"I'm all ears, what are you thinking?" Vivian asked interested.

"A consultant job. The only problem Danny has is being out in the field. But he can do brilliant work in the office. He has always been very smart and solved unsolved cases more than once."

"That's true," Vivian agreed cautiously.

"I think that he could take up unsolved cases…"

Vivian shook her head. "Uff…Jack, that's hard. It's very frustrating. When we have unsolved cases, coming back over them is almost like hitting against a wall. Do you believe that it would be good for Danny to work on those cases exclusively?"

"You yourself solved a four year unsolved case, remember?"

"Yes, but that was just a lucky break, a clue that showed up…these types of cases can't be forced."

"But, it'd be a new view, a new approach…I think Danny could do it and if he's successful, he'll have a secured job and our office will be released from all the control they currently have on us."

Vivian remained thoughtful, remembering some of those unsolved cases. "We'll have to make a decision and select which cases we give him… at least in the beginning.

"Sure," Jack smiled realizing he could count on her. "I'd like you'd help me to make that decision. Help me choose which unsolved cases we'll give to Danny first."

"Have you talked to Olczyk yet?" she asked, not very convinced.

"Somewhat… I'll convince him." Jack replied firmly.

…..

"I thought you'd never call me," Was the reply Jack got as a greeting, when he called William Gordon.

"Excuse me. As I told you when you first came to me, I can't take this investigation on as a priority, even though I have been working on it." Jack explained.

"Have you got anything?" Will asked.

"No, actually I haven't, but I want to ask you something. Have you told your father what you're doing?" Jack asked.

"No…no…I'd never do that. It's been years since I've talked to him but…maybe my sister…she saw me the day I went to talk to you, maybe she told him I was around there. But I didn't tell her anything, either."

"Did your sister see you with me?"

"Yes, she works there. I don't know if she saw us. I think I told her that I was going to talk to you. Why are you asking?"

"Because your father asked me to stop investigating him and the only thing I did ask for was your family's file, following the indications you gave me." Jack explained.

He heard him curse and then nothing. "Mr. Gordon? Will, are you there?"

"That's what he's always done, every time I've tried to get any information about my parents. Always. So proud of his damn Foundation to reunite the families, keep them together, but me…he's always denied me the possibility." There was rage in Will's voice, a rage Jack understood very well.

"Well, calm down. I was just trying to know how your father could have known about this investigation, but it looks clear that your sister could have told him something. Well, from now on, when you have to talk to me, you call me and we'll meet somewhere else."

"Can you do that?"

"Of course, and I also tell you that I have resources to continue with this, even if it takes longer." Jack was surprised by the question.

"Nobody has taken my request seriously before, never," Will replied and Jack understood then. "You don't know how thankful I am."

"Don't thank me; it's your right to ask for that investigation and our duty to help."

"You don't understand…"

"I understand you, completely. Will, we'll keep contact." Jack didn't want the young man to continue feeling sorry for himself, he was feeling uncomfortable with it.

The resources Jack had told Will about were only a card Jack that had found in Danny's home. A name and a cell phone number. Lukas Wyler.

…

Carefully, Danny headed to Jack's office. On his way, several agents welcomed him. In the bullpen there was nobody at the moment, but he saw Jack in his office through the glass that separated the spaces. As he walked, he noticed his old desk without his nameplate, there was no trace of his little motorcycles and the little train he had on the desk. However, the name of a Joseph Riley, took its place, a name that sounded familiar but didn't know why. The sharp pain in his hip reminded him about his physical condition and the fact that he was probably going to talk to his boss, just to get a letter saying that he'd been fired. He didn't feel any emotion about it, he felt bad about the name of that Riley being on his desk, more than the fact that he wouldn't work there anymore. Maybe that was part of his punishment. A shiver ran down his spine as he tried to avoid that thought.

Knocking softly on the door, he preceded to enter Jack's office, when Jack raised his eyes and indicated him to enter.

Immediately, Jack stood up and approached him, offering him a seat, as paternally as out of place, especially for a man like Jack Malone, who was always pretty reserved with his emotions. Not knowing if he should feel upset or not, Danny didn't want to appear disabled in any manner, he opted simply for smiling and he listened to himself muttering a thanks.

"How are you?" Jack asked.

Obvious. "Fine, more or less. Getting used to this," Danny replied, pointing to his cane that probably would accompany him for the rest of his life. Jack didn't feel comfortable with the answer. "But I'm fine, Jack. I'm getting better everyday."

"I'm glad to hear that," he said. "I know that you're wondering why I asked you to come and I won't let you wait anymore. I have an offer for you, a job for you." Jack decided to start from the last part.

"A job?" Danny asked intrigued.

"Well, you've noticed that there's a new agent occupying your desk," Jack started. "It wasn't my idea," he added with a serious face.

"I understand," Danny agreed. "I think it's normal, the medical reports about my hip aren't good, Jack. I don't see how I could stay in my current condition…"

"You'll stay," Jack interrupted. "They forcefully imposed an agent on my team, without consulting me and without my approval. So I've asked for my compensation. You'll stay with us as a consultant and as an investigator."

"What…what do you mean?" Danny asked.

"I mean, and this is not negotiable, that you're going to have your own office, in our bullpen, you're going to share opinions, theories and participate in the cases we're working. Moreover, and this is very important, we have to work the best way we can, so that's the reason to keep your job, you're going to be working on unsolved cases and try to make them active again."

Danny frowned. That was too much, even if he could only feel grateful. "An office job. Working unsolved cases is not easy, especially if I have to be successful at it, who am I going to count on?"

"You can work with the people who worked the cases, you'll have access to anything you need, and you can work with Vivian and with me."

"What about Sam or Martin?"

"Nothing, you can count on them too for anything you need, what I mean is that Viv and I will be your supervisors."

"I understand. And it isn't negotiable."

"It isn't. And there's something else you have to do and it's not negotiable either."

Danny grimaced. He'd guessed what was coming, even though he wasn't sure. Ten minutes before he didn't expect that.

"Tuesday at 10:00AM. Dr. Harris."

No, he didn't guess wrong. He would have to attend the shrink. "Not negotiable."

"Danny, listen. I've had your termination letter in my hands. Your situation during these last times wasn't very positive. Three weeks of suspension are in your file and it's an aggravating circumstance at your current situation. That was weird, I'd say unfair, even though the fault was there. And what happened to you…well, I didn't want you to leave that way. If you leave, it'll be only because you want."

"I understand, Jack. I…I know that I screwed things up then and I'm glad you trust me… I don't know what to say or what to do to thank you…the truth is I don't deserve this."

"You deserve it, don't say that stupidity again, and you know how to thank me. Do your job and follow the advice we give you."

"Why are you doing this?"

"You wouldn't like to hear my answer to that question," Jack finished, standing up. "Come with me, I'll show you your new office. You're not going to miss your old desk, I can tell you that much."

….

Tuesday, 10:00AM was the appointment Jack had agreed with Dr. Harris in Danny's name. It was also the appointment Jack had agreed to in a nearby café at the Federal Plaza. Lukas Wyler was already at his usual table, drinking a hot coffee when Jack opened the door.

He observed him carefully, as the veteran agent headed to the counter and talked to the bartender before heading toward his table, not caring about the way Wyler was looking at him. It wasn't a bad beginning, Wyler thought. The implication wasn't so close, which no doubt, helped.

"So you're at a crossroads," he began as his way of greeting.

Jack sat down in front of him and frowned. "I guess you're Lukas Wyler," he said.

"The picture that the FBI has of me is old, but I haven't changed that much," Wyler smiled, figuring that Jack had investigated him. "You haven't changed much either," he added.

The waitress put the coffee that Jack had asked for on the table and Wyler gave her his empty coffee cup. "Would you like anything else, Mr. Wyler?" She asked.

"Water, please," he replied.

"Why did you leave the FBI? You had a brilliant career…" Jack couldn't help but ask.

Wyler held his sight for a second and he looked like he was going to answer the question, but instead, he picked up his briefcase and removed a folder that Jack found to be very familiar. It was the same one he had seen in Danny's home. He swallowed.

"We haven't met here to talk about me," Wyler warned him. His serious tone made it clear to Jack that the situation needed all the attention he could put on it. "I'm glad to know that the person that I'm going to work with is as serious as I am about this situation. Am I right, Agent Malone?"

Jack nodded. "I've already seen that folder and…"

"That's not exactly correct. If you're referring to the documents I gave to Agent Taylor, that folder contained approximately only a third part of this one. But, like I told you when you entered, you're at a crossroads, especially if the information you're looking for is a request from William Gordon, who, by the way, I appreciate very much."

"Do you know him?" Jack asked in surprise.

"I knew him. A long time ago, before he left Washington, I tried to help him. I did something similar to what your Agent Taylor did. And I found the same obstacles he found, the same you've found. I can't tell you that I've devoted my life to investigate these cases exclusively, but I can tell you that I'm the only one who cares. I've solved three cases. This is the fourth one. And there are twelve."

"Twelve? What happened with the others?" Jack asked, understanding he was talking about a more complicated matter than he ever thought. What was Danny doing? Or Rafi?

"The others didn't come to me. Maybe they don't know or don't want to know. You see, people are free to look for their own path, although my experience tells me that if they know, the wish of finding their origins is strong and they never give up. This is Will Gordon's case, of course. I don't know if it is for Agent Taylor or the person he's representing. I was surprised to see how easily he gave up."

Jack didn't explain to him the devastating problems that reading those documents had caused to Danny.

"You're going to find the majority of the information you need in these documents. This is a lot more than what I gave to your agent, but there are about three boxes with reports, photographs, and official documents, kept under custody at the Pentagon. It'll take some time to get it if you want, but if you're patient, I'll try. Anyway, this information should be enough for Gordon, as well as for Taylor."

"The Pentagon?" Jack wondered confused. "What are we talking about, Mr. Wyler?"

"It's called _Operation Kangaroo_. In the beginning of seventies, the American government began a secret mission to send American citizens to Cuba to obtain information about the Cuban population, economic situation, social activities, observe the chances of an insurrection…you understand me."

Jack nodded.

"They selected twelve people, Cuban immigrants, troubled people with no preparation. Thieves, socially troubled people…"

Jack grimaced.

"If they came back with the information, the government would get valuable information; if something went wrong…nobody would ask questions."

"Why would they agree to do that?" Jack asked.

"The government took away custody of several kids and gave them up for adoption, temporarily." Wyler replied.

"What?!" Jack was stunned.

"And money, of course. The families were already under the social services radar. Their wives were told that it was a temporary separation, a Pilot program to improve their family situation and of course, they'd get their children back."

"But it didn't work out like that,"

"It did sometimes. I suppose that could be true for the cases I've never been requested to investigate. But other cases…things went wrong and by the time that the Operation was canceled, it was too late for most of them. This," Wyler put his hand on the folder, "is one of those cases."

Removing his hand, Jack was able to read "_Operation Kangaroo. File number 9: Álvarez."_

"This is what George Gordon fears to be known," Jack muttered.

"Yes, and he had his biggest problem in his own home. William was four years old when he was adopted and still had enough memories to remember his other life. When he was old enough, he had a big argument with his father; he wanted to know about his parents and brothers. While his father ran a beautiful foundation, his petition was ignored. And it was like that for years, until one day he asked me for help."

"William Gordon asked you for help?"

"He was about seventeen. His best friend was the son of my partner at the FBI, Victor Fitzgerald…"

"Martin?" Jack almost exclaimed.

Wyler smiled. "When I saw him in the bullpen, the day I came to give these documents to your agent, I was also surprised, it was a moment of déjà vu."

Jack thought about Danny's current situation, almost leaving the FBI, and he couldn't help the comparison.

"Victor Fitzgerald and George Gordon were very close friends. So then, although Gordon had abandoned politics, they still had a friendship and I have proof that it's still strong to this day."

Jack could confirm that, but he preferred not to tell him.

"I tried to stick my nose in something that wasn't my business. And that was the beginning of the end. I think I've answered your question."

"What…?" Jack started before realizing that was the first question he had asked. A strange man, Jack Wyler.

"The day I got the documents for Agent Taylor and I realized it was the same file that affected Will, I almost gave up, but then I thought that it would put an end to his suffering. I don't know what your Agent Taylor did with the information I gave him, but I'm afraid he didn't do much."

Jack shook his head. "I don't think he read a lot. He…let's say that he suffered a crisis, and he didn't want to know anything else. His life hasn't been easy and I already found it weird to see him investigating his past, about something he didn't know at all, I know. The past was something he didn't want to deal with. It was only the circumstances happening around his brother, that forced him to start that search."

"What was he looking for?" Wyler asked.

Jack remembered looking for the words Danny had said. "Something about family records… Rafi had been diagnosed with an illness…"

"I understand, it would be something absolutely new to him," Wyler reasoned. "I remember something that Will told me. It was a mental image he had of his mother with a baby on her arms, the day he left his home forever. That baby could be Danny."

Jack nodded. Both men exchanged a worried look. They had a delicate situation to solve. "A crossroads," Jack said, remembering Wyler's words.

….

Stretching out his hand to take his cane, Danny stood up carefully. His still healing hip protested, as he forced his muscle to make the work his bones couldn't do. He didn't feel nervous; it was relief for not having to see the compassion of some of his colleagues' faces, or that stupid Riley occupying what had been his place for years, his desk, his work, his colleagues.

Fortunately, they would have been working on the field, so nobody was witness to the effort he had to make to reach the elevator. Dr. Harris' office was five floors up and on his way he had time to think about what Jack had asked him to do. It was clear that Jack wanted him to stay, despite the chances he had for a full recovery. Surely, he would have to pass several tests of evaluation that the psychological department had prepared. So, when he found himself sitting down in front of Dr. Harris, he just waited for her to begin his evaluations of him.

"Agent Taylor," Dr. Harris had to repeat for third time, frowning lightly and inviting him with a smile to relax. Obviously, the young agent she had in front of her, had nothing to do with what she had seen of him in previous meetings. Finally, she got him to look at her.

Danny blinked, surprised by his own distraction. "Excuse me," he almost muttered.

She smiled back. "Well," she said. "What is it that's brought you here, Agent Taylor?"

'Jack Malone', Danny thought. But no, that wasn't the right answer, obviously, so he thought about the reason Jack had sent him there. 'Save my ass'. No, that wouldn't work either. Dr. Harris would know that. "I don't know, I'm not sure," were the words he pronounced, as he uncomfortably remembered the feelings that tortured him every day and had made him accept that appointment without too much argument.

"Relax, Agent Taylor, you're in a safe place and nothing we talk about here will be said outside of these four walls. You can tell me whatever you want, how you feel, how your relationship with your coworkers is now, your job…but, there's always something that make us pick up the phone and ask for help. I know that it's difficult, it's never just one event, sometimes we don't know why, but we need to start. Think about it and tell me something different other than 'I don't know'."

Listening to Dr. Harris' words made Danny feel a vulnerability he usually tried to avoid. But this time, he also felt the need to let out those feelings that made him so confused and scared. It was a fear that had almost led him down the wrong path.

"I think…I think it was about two years ago. It was the day that Viv was undergoing surgery, she had a heart issue, and she was worried about it because the surgery was risky."

Lisa Harris was able to keep her expression neutral, hiding her surprise. Taking her notebook, she started writing. "Continue, please," she encouraged the young agent, aware that he wasn't telling her anything difficult yet. That was the easy part.

"So…we were in the car, Martin…Agent Fitzgerald was driving. It was dark. We were taking a prisoner to the detention center and we had stopped at a red traffic light when my cell phone started ringing. It was Jack to tell us about Viv's surgery. Good news. I think that my conversation with Jack while Martin was looking at the traffic light, made me lose some concentration. Like I told you, we were escorting a prisoner… I didn't realize my surroundings and I only realized when Martin pushed the horn." Danny stopped and looked for some kind of confirmation from Dr. Harris, who simply smiled. "I think that Martin has told you this story," he continued hesitantly.

"Don't think about what I may or may not know, Agent Taylor. You and I never talked about this before and you shouldn't omit anything you think I know. Tell me whatever you want, tell me your experience." She encouraged him.

"Well, the fact is…well, I got distracted with the call, I distracted Martin and suddenly the situation was a living hell. There was a van in front of us that didn't move when the traffic light changed to green and made Martin pushed the horn, not realizing, like me, the strangeness of the situation and well, I was…I was telling him about Viv and…" Danny stopped and rubbed a hand over his hair, nervously.

"What happened?" She asked softly.

"There was a shooting," Danny replied after a pause. "The doors of the van were opened and two guys started shooting. I ducked down in my seat and at yelled Martin to drive in reverse. I know he did everything that he could; I only was able to yell. I only wanted to get out of there. At some point, we crashed into something and I lost consciousness but suddenly I recovered when I heard shooting again. Then, I got out of the car and got protection behind it as I shot the guys, but my gun got jammed and one of them ran before I could do anything else."

"A difficult situation," she concluded.

"Yes. Well, not for me, actually. When I felt I was safe, I checked on Martin. He was in the car. He looked at me…he looked at me that way a dying person looks…confused, stunned, trying to get your soul and save his, without understanding why you're there alive, while he was dying…" Danny remained lost in his thoughts for a moment.

"Martin Fitzgerald, your colleague, he was injured in that attack, I remember. What did you do?"

"I called an ambulance and tried to help him. I pulled him out of the car, there was so much blood. He had been shot in the chest and I…I tried to stop the bleeding. It was something familiar, it was the same. I had done that before, you know?"

"Working at Missing Persons?" Lisa Harris did not know where that conversation was going and how it could be related to what had happened to him so recently.

Danny shook his head. "I tried to save my father. He…he also looked at me that way, while he was dying and I tried to stop all the blood around him. Just like what happened with Martin, I distracted him, I called his attention and the car started…rolling over and…I tried to save them…"

"I understand," she said. "So, we're here because of two similar events, separated by time, where two significant people resulted severely injured because you…distracted them? I don't know your father's case, but from what you've told me about your partner…in my opinion it doesn't look like you had any other choice or to do something differently. What happened with your father?"

"No, you don't understand. They…they…"

"What happened with your father?" She repeated.

"He died," Danny replied. "And my mother too; in the accident."

"Why do you think that you distracted your father?" Dr. Harris asked not knowing what the answer would be since she didn't know a word about that incident and she feared making a mistake.

"He was…he was yelling at my mom, arguing about something. I don't remember what, they were always yelling. I was sitting in the backseat and I wanted them to stop, so I said something, I distracted my father who turned back to me and…"

"And the car rolled over, your mom died and you tried to save your father," she concluded. Noticing Danny nodding she continued. "I call that an 'accident'. How old were you then?"

Danny looked at her and frowned. "I know I'm not guilty of what happened. I was eleven, I was a kid. However…"

"You feel guilty."

"Sometimes. When Martin and I suffered the ambush, it was…I…I felt the same and...and…" Danny stopped, he had reached the point that tortured him and he was fearful of saying it aloud because he feared the consequences of it.

She waited patiently. "Sometimes in life, an event has some characteristics that make us link it to another. I understand you felt something like that, but the situation is completely different, do you understand, Agent Taylor? Danny?" She tried to call his attention although he looked lost in his thoughts.

"When…" Danny finally spoke. "When I was shot…I was with Martin. It was a confusing situation, looking for a suspect in a strange place. There was some kind of labyrinth and it made it difficult to back each other up. There were other agents, apart from us. I went into the industrial unit with Martin and walked as he stayed behind. I don't know what happened, there were walls and shadows in that labyrinth and suddenly I felt a burning in my leg and then I heard the shot. I fell down and felt another bullet impact my shoulder. I remember seeing Martin, with a scared expression, dropping his gun and running towards me… trying to help me, trying to stop the bleeding and I…I was looking at him…."

"What did you feel then?" Dr. Harris asked, remembering Danny's words about a dying man stealing his soul. She expected a similar answer.

"Relieved," Danny muttered.

"What?" Lisa had barely heard Danny's reply.

"Relieved," Danny repeated as the tears rolled down his face. With rage he wiped them away angrily as he tried to control himself. It was done. He had said it.

"Why did you feel relieved?"

"I felt that it was what I deserved. My distraction caused my mom's death and almost caused Martin's death as well. It was right that Martin would cause my death. It's fair." He concluded. "I can't help but feel like that and I've survived. Maybe the danger of losing my job, or having to use this cane for the rest of my life…maybe that's my punishment."

"But, Martin didn't cause your death…"

"It's…symbolic, isn't it? Actually, I'm here, with you right now. I'm not a ghost," Danny was able to smile at his own words.

"Do you think Martin shot you or is that what you would've liked to have happened, Agent Taylor?"

"I know it was him. There was nobody else but us there, why would I want that to happen?" He asked confused.

Lisa didn't reply at that moment. She wrote 'consult the file' before saying something. "Tell me yourself. You say you feel relieved, that it was fair. Would it have been fair if your colleague hadn't of pulled the trigger?"

"Well, he shot me, that's it," he replied, confirming Dr. Harris' suspicions. "But don't tell anybody. I haven't."

She looked at him in surprise. "Alright," she replied not wanting to continue that conversation without having more information.

Looking at the time, she realized there was fifteen minutes left so she decided to change subject. "What's your job now with the team?"

…

Getting out of the elevator, Danny slowly headed to his office. The sunrays illuminated the offices on the twelfth floor of the FBI building, welcoming a new day. During his usual walk, Danny had the opportunity to observe under a new point of view, those offices so close to him.

Seven months had passed since he had come back, since he had started working that job Jack had asked him to do and, after several weeks of adjustment and incredulity, it seemed that everybody felt well with the new structure of the team.

Everybody but him, of course. Rumor had reached him that he wasn't well-liked in the Missing Persons Unit. A call from him usually meant, to them, an observation about a case wrongly solved, or unsolved. Those cases, Danny's work, usually ended two ways: being definitively closed or solved once they found the lifeless body of the missing person hidden in some dark place. Maybe, that's why he started to be called D.D. for Danny Death.

Despite his explanations about the reason for the call not having anything to do about with anything being wrong, instead about trying to find a new lead and try to solve the case, understanding the reports and clarifying the doubts he had, his calls were never welcome and more than once the conversations ended with something slamming the phone on him and hanging up. He had worked twenty-three cases, had reactivated seven cases, and solved five, with the expected result. In the end, Danny only had the solace of seeing a relieved family ending the search for their missing loved one, even if the end was followed by a funeral.

That morning wasn't going to be different. His former colleagues were working on the search of a missing kid that had disappeared the day before. Somehow, he felt glad about not having to participate on it. Kids were always a difficult matter. Theirs was Thomas Grady, twelve years old, missing when he left school on his way to the civic center where he went twice a week to play chess. 'Chess' Danny thought as he couldn't help but feel it strange, remembering what he was doing at that age.

A slap on his shoulder freed him from his thoughts. Martin had met him the night before in AA, where their relationship was completely different to the one in the office. There was something that happened since Joe Riley had taken his place and had become Martin's shadow. The one he shared coffee with, during those meetings in AA was the real Martin he had always known.

"Hey," he replied. "How are you doing?" He asked interested.

"The police have been looking through the area but they haven't found the kid or any personal effects. There are some footprints that look to be the kid's, close to the bus stop, and some tire prints that Viv is investigating. Sam and Joe are looking for witnesses, but you know… sometimes people just don't see anything."

"Maybe he left in a car with someone he knew so nobody noticed anything wrong." Danny reasoned.

Martin smiled. "It would be an explanation," he agreed. "I have to investigate the parents… damn it, I hope I don't find anything…" he continued speaking to himself more than to Danny.

"Yeah," Danny said.

Martin sat down in front of the computer and entering the FBI database, he started to work on Mr. Grady's financials. Focused on it, he forgot Danny was still there. Upon seeing his colleague frowning and focused on his work, Danny opted for leaving and headed to his office.

It wasn't the first time he felt out of place with the team, but it was usual. He wasn't part of that team anymore, even if he was still around. The light walls of glass which separated them were actually separating much more than a physical space. And all of them looked to assimilate that new reality; everyone but him.

His, his case, Travis Hewings, was waiting on his desk, patiently. Two boxes of evidence and documents that he'd started revising that morning. That case had been lead by Nick Carter, who was working on the Missing Persons Unit for the past three years but at the time of Hewings' disappearance he was only a few weeks in a similar job that Jack had. Hewings had actually been his second case. Carter came from the homicide division in Philadelphia, which gave Danny certain advantage over the investigation, and probably, even to Carter. The way of working the cases were very different when they investigated a homicide than a missing person case, a work against the clock.

It was his twenty-fourth case, since he'd first began this new job seven months ago.

After switching on the light, he put his jacket on his seat and opened the two boxes that rested on his desk. Picking up the reports in the first place where all the procedures were reported, he opened the first one and took the picture of Travis Hewings and fastened it onto the board he had ordered be put into the room.

Folders, archives and some books, after all the time passed, had occupied his office, but none of his small toys could be found in that office. It wasn't only the momentary manner which Danny had understood his job, but the commitment that his personal life would never go into those offices, ever again. And the small motorbikes and trains were included in his decision.

Vivian shared some information about the case with Martin, when she noticed Danny leaning on the wide window of his office, looking thoughtfully. Vivian observed Danny closely, in fact that was her additional job, a favor Jack had asked and she didn't refuse. Vivian knew how hard it could be trying to solve old cases, knowing that most would end with a dead body to give the families. She had argued with some of her coworkers when she learned about the nickname they were calling Danny, D.D., a name that was given to Danny by Joe Riley. She made them think about the complexity of Danny's job and the effort that he had to put in to satisfactorily solve the cases, in order to justify his position in the FBI, in a moment where his letter of termination was still in a drawer in Jack's desk. That detail wasn't told to Riley, but she did explain it to the others.

Martin got her attention about some bank movements on Thomas Grady's father's accounts, and she didn't think about Danny again until twenty minutes later, when she noticed him still standing in the same place.

While Martin took his jacket and headed to talk to Jack about interviewing Mr. Grady, Vivian approached Danny's office.

Barely knocking on the door, she opened it. Danny turned just enough to know who was coming in. He smiled, Vivian was always a comfort to him and she was a person he wouldn't need to give too many explanations to. She didn't ask for any explanations, yet she always knew what to do. It was a skill that Danny always appreciated, maybe because he felt unable to do it.

"Do you need help with any case?" She asked.

Danny sighed. "No, it's…Vivian, it's getting me down. I don't know, I've started with a case and thirty minutes later, I find something so important, so definitive that I don't know what to do with it."

"Who was working that case?" Vivian asked, taking the documents Danny had on his desk.

"Nick Carter, it would be one of his first cases, from three years ago," Danny explained.

"Three years…" Viv repeated, shaking her head.

"Yes… the fact is…there's a coincidence in the reports of several witness, classmates that agree in their statements about a matter that was, however, ignored in the investigation. I don't understand, it was only a simple confirmation," Danny explained anxiously, which got Vivian's attention.

"What do you mean? Tell me about the case," she encouraged him.

"Travis Hewing. He was seventeen years old at the time of his disappearance and he was studying at the Sanders School of Graphics. It was there when asking his classmates, all of them agreed about the possibility that Travis was hiding something in his locker, because the care he put into keeping his contents out of the sight from everyone and his dodgy behavior. Still, some of them said that they looked in the locker and that there was nothing strange."

"And, what was in the locker?" Vivian asked.

"They didn't check it," Danny raised his arms and looked at Vivian, directly to her eyes, with desperation.

She was surprised.

"From there, the investigation followed other lines of work that didn't lead to any useful result, but they never came back to the locker."

"Wow…I suppose there's an explanation," Vivian reasoned. "And it's too late, of course… Checking that locker now, it'd be nonsense, three years later…"

"I don't know…you're going to say I'm crazy but I'd like to see that locker. I've thought that maybe the classmates who didn't see anything strange, could've been telling the truth, but… something tells me that I should look in that locker…and I don't have anything to lose." Danny said.

It was an invitation. Vivian thought about it. Actually, there was nothing to lose and checking out that theory wouldn't take long. "All right, let's see that locker."


	9. Chapter 9

**Breaking the rule. Chapter 9**

"It's been a long time." The Principal of Sanders School of Graphics showed his surprise when the two FBI agents began questioning him about a case most of the students only knew by gossip.

"I'll show you that locker, but during all this time, it's been used by other students and I don't think…" he commented as he looked through his paperwork for the number of the locker in question.

"246," Danny interrupted him, realizing what the man was looking for. "Let us decide the usefulness of the inspection." He added. His curt and convincing tone surprised even Vivian. She hadn't worked with him for a long time. Was it possible that he had changed so much?

Danny noticed his colleague's gesture and while the Principal walked toward the lockers zone, he whispered in her ear "They always tell me that I'm wasting my time."

Vivian smiled as they stopped beside the Principal in front of locker number 246. "I'll have to call the student who rents this locker. You'll understand…"

"Do you need a court order?" Danny asked ironically. "Maybe that was what delayed and indefinitely made that line of investigation to be ruled out at the time."

"God, no!" The Principal exclaimed.

He was going to add something else but Danny cut him off. "Then, open it."

Upset, the Principal opened the locker. Inside, the typical objects of any student filled the small locker, but Danny focused his attention on the inside part of the door, which he examined carefully. Removing some papers fixed on it, he took his small flashlight, moving it along the door.

Stopping in the lower part, he looked to find what he was searching for. "Do you have white chalk?" He asked the principal as he half-closed his eyes trying to read something.

The Principal turned back and opened the door of one of the classroom in front of the lockers area. One moment later, he gave Danny what he had asked, and observed intrigued what the agent was going to do.

Softly, Danny started painting the door with the chalk on the marks that had caught his attention. Vivian held the flashlight lighting up the marks and the three of them could see clearly what the marks said; a date and an address, the most important information at the moment.

"I'll call for backup," Vivian said instantly, getting a sad smile from Danny. Too late, he thought, but didn't say a word. "And a court order," she continued, guessing her colleague's intentions.

They arrived just a few minutes before the backup cars. Danny headed limping on his injured leg toward the door. The house looked abandoned, almost torn down. Resting his hand on the doorknob, the door opened just by the gesture. "Danny, wait," Vivian warned. But he was already inside the house, so she followed him, looking back and checking an FBI car approaching. Soon, several agents joined them clearing the house and surrounding area. Finally, someone called in finding something and all the agents ran toward the backyard, where one of the agents had opened a trap door in the garden.

When Danny finally joined them, the devastation was evident. They had found Travis Hewings, or whatever it left of him, he thought. He didn't feel affected by the fact the guy was dead, it was the expected and what he was used to, but when Vivian approached him and looked into his eyes, Danny knew that there was something else. "What happen?" he asked.

"There are at least twenty people in there," was the devastating answer he got. "They are all dead."

…..

When Jack called Danny to his office, four days had passed and the echoes of that find still rang over the corridors. His colleagues doubted whether to congratulate him or not, but everyone looked at him differently. He wasn't a hero, he hadn't saved anybody, but the way he had been working along the months, took a different relevance.

"Here you have him," he heard Jack saying, when he opened the door of his boss' office to meet Jack's former supervisor, Paula Van Doren, who currently worked in Washington.

"Agent Taylor," she greeted, holding out her hand to Danny. "I suppose you know why I'm here,"

"I guess it's about Travis' case," Danny replied embarrassed as he shook the offered hand.

"Of course. The result of this investigation has surprised a lot my colleagues in my office. We didn't know about this interesting job of revising unsolved cases and Jack has told me the effort and great job you're doing. I had to come to New York and I didn't want to lose the opportunity to congratulate you," she said.

Out of the corner of his eye, Danny looked at the smirk on Jack's face and realized the fawning from Van Doren.

"Thank you Ma'am, it's a job Jack gave me and I've done my best in getting good results. Not only me, but also all the people working with me every case, remembering, finding mistakes, details that weren't notice then...which is not an easy job, especially after the amount of time that the events occurred. Fortunately, most of the cases were well done and we have worked on just a few of them. It means that we do our work well, although there are a few exceptions."

Jack smiled. He wasn't surprised by the calmed answer Danny gave Van Doren. It was evident that he had changed, a lot.

"Don't play down your merit, Agent," Van Doren smiled.

Jack made a significant mockery Danny felt intrigued by. He didn't know that Van Doren had come with congratulations from Victor Fitzgerald for the great work the team was doing since Joe Riley had joined them. He hadn't heard the specific explanation Jack had given to Van Doren, his protest for Riley's imposition and the merit for that job that only, and just only, belonged to Danny Taylor. Noticing how she changed her speech in a moment, caused him some joy and happiness for Danny, who finally and in justice saw the acknowledgement to the effort he was doing, and not only at his work, like Jack very well knew and not because Danny had told him specifically.

When Van Doren left his office, Jack burst out laughing.

"What happened to you with Van Doren?" Danny asked.

"Nothing, nothing," Jack replied. "I've just had a great time, that's all." He paused before turning more confident and serious. "I liked your response to Van Doren. You…you've changed. You've grown up." Danny raised an eyebrow. "You've matured." Jack added. "I suppose it's that."

"Oh, well maybe I'm getting used to it." Danny clarified. "It's not only about what I find in the end, it's not the joke my colleagues play with or the actual feeling of loneliness while I'm working a case. It's…it's opening old wounds, coming back to visit the families, witnesses, colleagues who doesn't understand that I'm calling them for help and not to reproach anything, it's just I'm…I'm trying to solve the cases. Do you know how many people have left my office crying at the realization they could have saved a life and it didn't happen because they ignore something?" Danny shook his head. "I'd give anything to have back my former place and Van Doren wouldn't come to congratulate me for anything. But this leg…this leg doesn't want to recover despite the full time I dedicate to rehabilitate it."

"I understand," Jack agreed softly, surprised by the honesty of his agent. "I understand this is complicated Danny, but you're doing a good job and I'm sure that from now on, things will be different."

"They'll take me seriously…and they won't want to talk to me anymore. Do you know what happened to Carter? I didn't even talk to him. To me, Travis Hewings was another case. To Carter, finding that seventeen people probably died because he didn't check a simple locker, would have been horrible."

The news about Carter's suicide had caused commotion and had been the gossip on the corridors throughout the day before.

"But it didn't have to have been like that."

"He didn't give me the chance to talk to him. He didn't give it to himself. I don't feel responsible but I don't like the consequences my job is taking. Not even the relief the families say to feel for knowing and finally rest is enough."

"I'm surprised you tell me this, Danny. Not because I don't understand. Vivian came to talk to me a couple of days ago. She wants me to relieve you of your duties, but for a different reason."

Danny shifted nervously, but he didn't say a word.

"She thinks you've gotten used to it. She noticed your reaction when they found the trap and all the bodies. While other agents reacted at the horrific situation, you remained away and just gave orders and made calls."

"I… I didn't want to approach. I knew what was there because they kept giving me information about what happened. I think that was what kept me busy and still. Someone had to stay, you can't imagine…" Danny started.

"You know what's said, when nothing is affects you, it's because you've lost perspective." Jack told him. He took a brown folder on his desk and handed it to him. Danny opened it and found a picture of Travis Hewings looking into his eyes. After that, sixteen other smiling faces obscured his vision.

"The forensic team concluded the identifications of all the bodies that were found," Jack said. "And the Homicide Department has opened an investigation to work on finding out what happened there and who is responsible. From what I know, the initial investigation is leading toward organ trafficking."

"Oh my god," Danny muttered rubbing a hand over his face.

"Not everything ends with finding a dead body. Maybe it ends for you but it's possible that the investigation now opened can lead to save more lives, apart from the seventeen boys and girls you found. I suppose you understand that, don't you?"

Danny averted his eyes from the pictures for a moment to find himself totally disarmed as he stood before his boss. "I don't…I don't know what to say, Jack. This…"

"Danny, listen to me. This work requires a lot from us, a lot from you at this moment, but it's all we've got, for now. You can give up, leave and ask for an administrative job, I'm sure you'll get something. But I'm also sure that you don't want that. I'm not the best advisor and my own example won't help you, but you have to try to see the positive side of all of this. If not…"

Danny nodded. A thousand ideas came to his mind at that moment and they all ended in a moment he tried to find out, further away. When had things started to be so bad?

"Jack, when…when I left the hospital knowing that I probably couldn't walk without help ever again in my life, knowing that I would come back only to say goodbye…then… then maybe I would have tried to study for the BAR exam and become a lawyer…and I say maybe because then things weren't clear in that way either. I was confused and I needed something or someone to rely on. You gave me the opportunity and I just took it without thinking about the consequences and then…then I have to admit, Dr. Harris did a good job with me." Danny paused. "Now, you can't tell me to give up. I can't leave right now. It would be the worst thing for me. I don't want to leave, bowing my head and leaving a shadow of enemies behind me."

"What are you talking about?" Jack asked surprised.

"Don't you hear the comments they make in the halls, don't you hear what I'm telling you, how my relationship with my colleagues is, with the ones who worked those cases with me, with the ones I've considered my own family for years? I barely talk with Sam, Martin ignores me most of the time…I just have Vivian and that's only because you asked her…"

"I don't think it's like you say, honestly…" Jack started, before he was interrupted by the knock on the door before it opened.

Sam interrupted the conversation, earning a grimace from Jack, which she ignored. The investigation was a priority over any other matter. "Tom Grady's parents have arrived," she announced.

Jack stood up. "Well, let's see what they have to say," he said seriously, while he headed to the outside. "Danny…we'll continue this conversation later, alright?" he added.

"Sure," Danny replied, picking up the pictures and putting them into the folder Jack had given him a while before.

Jack and Sam left and he remained alone for a moment, trying to evaluate everything that had happened, since Van Doren congratulations, Jack's laughs for no reason… until almost admitting he couldn't continue that work much longer. The personal fatigue was evident and the wear of the relationship with his colleagues was intensifying. He wasn't happy there anymore; it wasn't his place to be. Maybe it was time to try other things. But Danny wasn't an enthusiast of changes, especially after finding some sort of stability. Thinking about it, he opened Jack's office and was to go out when things went completely wrong.

Danny felt as he was held by the shoulders and pushed against the glass wall of Jack's office. He felt the pain on his back at the same time he heard the screaming. He saw the shaken face, felt the drops of spit on his face and he felt an unbearable burning that began inside his left wrist, took waves of pain along his arm up and down, as he felt the warm liquid flowing profusely from his hand. The cut had to have been deep, when his hand hit and sliced through the knob of Jack's office door. Seconds later after being freed, he noticed the blood on the floor and realized what had happened. Then, he recognized Francis Channing, Nick Carter's colleague and he understood the words the man was yelling at him just inches from his face, words the man continued yelling even as he was strongly held by other agents.

"You killed him! You had no right to take the lead on that investigation; that was ours! You mocked him and ruined everything he did for this unit, all our work. He's been a colleague and you treated him like shit, you didn't let him to explain or show you the evidence, not even work the case by himself! What are you doing Taylor, what merit do you want to add yourself, how many people are you going to trash for your own benefit! Do you believe that having your own office and taking your time to read reports, with no pressure, without a ruthless clock to force you to make decisions quickly, choices that not always are the right ones, you are going to teach us about how to do our job?! You're very wrong, you've failed, you took advantage and I'm going to end this crap!"

It wasn't Danny who replied to him, but agent Chuck, who was always by his side, finding information for him, helping him on all the investigations, a job that was sometimes undervalued. Danny didn't have enough courage at the moment to reply to those accusations, not that Channing was going to give a damn about what Danny had to say. His boss, Nick Carter had committed suicide and he did so because of the responsibility Danny, inadvertently, had put over his shoulders. Danny never thought about finding seventeen dead bodies, he never thought about taking the case on himself…he was only intrigued. He should have talked to him and not gone personally to examine the locker, but…what would have changed at all?

While other agents took care of Channing, Danny went into Jack's office, dropped the folder and left, heading to the closest bathroom he could find to try and stop the hemorrhage that was getting serious. The trail of blood Danny left on his way to the bathroom was the one Martin took several minutes later, when he returned from happily reuniting Tom Grady with his parents and ending that investigation, then learned about what had happened. None of his colleagues, not Sam, Vivian nor Jack knew about the incident, but Joe Riley had been a first row spectator, just seeing, observing without doing absolutely anything. That was what Agent Chuck had told Martin, apart from the rest of the story, and what made Martin open his eyes and realize why Joe Riley was actually around. While he cursed himself and his father for poking his nose in his life, Martin ran through the corridors, following the trail of blood that Danny had left on his way to the bathroom.

Martin found him in the bathroom, sweaty and pale, with his head leaning on the mirror over the sink trying, unsuccessfully, to stop the blood that was flowing rapidly out of his badly injured wrist.

"Let me see," Martin said, taking his hand and removing the towel. "Gosh Danny, this isn't the way to stop the bleeding, what were you thinking? I'm going to take you to the hospital," he said. Danny looked at him without really seeing him; he was pale and felt weak. He simply nodded and let Martin lead him outside.

Two hours later, Martin was on the phone talking to Jack as he waited in the hospital. "He's okay, they closed the wound and he'll recover soon, but they want him to stay for a while, until his vital signs become stable again."

"Stay with him and don't let him go," Jack ordered.

Martin smiled. "Sure boss, he's already protesting but it'll be better if he stays. He'll be okay, Jack. He'll be up tomorrow morning."

Martin came back to the room to find Danny lying on the bed. Taking a chair, he sat down close to his colleague, who grimaced. "Are you going to stay here watching me?" he asked.

"I don't have anything better to do," Martin replied with a smile that quickly turned serious, "What happened? Chuck told me a story that…"

"Nick Carter was the supervisor working the Travis Hewings case." Danny explained to him.

"Oh…" Martin said. He had known, like everyone else, what had happened to Carter.

"Yeah," Danny paused before going on. "I understand that Channing and all his coworkers are affected by the consequences this case had for Carter, because of the conclusion of the case and… well…"

"It's not your fau…" Martin started, but Danny cut him.

"I never took part in the cases directly. We just studied new leads of work and the team who had worked the case continued the investigation, you've seen that. But this case…I don't know, it was that evident, that easy to check…I was talking to Vivian about it, you know? It was…I felt like nothing had changed and I was back with all of you … just like before."

"I understand," Martin agreed, feeling uneasy as his colleague's eyes glistened with moisture.

"No, you don't understand. You can't know how hard it is being there, seeing all of you working together, doing your job, ignoring me and seeing how my place has been occupied by another person and I…I'm not a part of it anymore. I think I rushed in, first, accepting this job and then this case…leading it…especially this case."

"You didn't know what you were going to find, Danny. You couldn't know that hunch would take you to the key that solved the case so easily. Anyone should understand that and yes, it was Carter's responsibility and if he couldn't resist the pressure, it's not because of what you did. If he would have done it, if he would have found the bodies…do you think he would have acted differently?"

"He would have done it. It's different." Danny concluded.

"Well, we're actually speculating about his attitude. We can't really know what Carter would have done in this case. But Danny, I can't believe I need to tell you this. You never left our team. We're a family, you should know that; especially you and I. You're a brother to me, not only because of what we've been through together, but also something else, something deeper."

"Yeah, well, when we coincide in the AA meetings I feel that way, but at the office…it's like there's an invisible wall between us. I'm there in that office, working on my own business and you…you…I thought you would count on me…"

"That's what we'd like, Danny, if you had time…" Martin smiled. "This morning you gave me and idea during a trivial conversation that helped to solve Tom Grady's case and you didn't even realize it."

"I thought you weren't listening to me…" Danny replied surprised.

"You see, Pal, we're a team, we always will be. And we're a family too, don't forget that. And I'm not going to include Joe Riley in our family, if you're wondering about that idiot that, you know who, imposed on us."

"Who?"

"My father, of course. It's been a while since I've been thinking about it and the attitude Riley took in the incident with Channing, just confirmed my theory. I don't know how he does it but he's always there and it seems like we are the greatest friends in the world, when it's actually the complete opposite. He makes me feel uncomfortable…a lot."

"I didn't know that; you two seemed very friendly. It's what I was telling you, in the AA meetings you're the Martin I've always known, but in the office…"

"There's something else. It's very rare, Jack told us, that an agent is imposed on a team without the approval of the supervisor. Riley hasn't really integrated with us and you know how important that is. I don't think he's interested in either. There are some circumstances that make me conclude why Riley is my shadow, because I believe it, and is also trying to ruin our friendship. If he knew about AA, he would become addicted to something just to attend those sessions."

Danny laughed at his friend's comment. "So, what's the secret mission your father has ordered Agent Riley to do?"

"I think he's trying to save my ass. Summarizing…" Martin paused. It was a delicate conversation he wanted to have with his friend at the right moment, and it looked like it would have to take place in that emergency room, with Danny lying on a bed pale as the sheets. No, it wasn't the right place or the right moment but there was the chance.

"Go on, I'm intrigued," Danny encouraged him.

"When…when Riley joined the team, the investigation about the events in the industrial unit was still open. You were in the hospital and there wasn't even a diagnosis about your injuries," Martin started.

Danny nodded.

"You know that my father always tried to keep me away from any issue, he never liked Jack, probably because he was always in the edge, in his opinion, and because he thought it could ruin my future in the political career he has planned for me." Martin grimaced. Danny was strong enough to put a comic face.

"Don't laugh at me, Danny, you don't know what it's like having a father like him," he said not thinking about the words and regretting them immediately. But Danny was used to it and knew what his friend meant.

"Moreover, you were back from that weird suspension. During those three weeks you were out, we tried to figure out what had happened. Jack didn't know and you never wanted to tell. But something happened and my father knows about our friendship, and also about what happened during the ambush with Dornvald. We've talked about this, you know that Danny."

Danny didn't laugh anymore but was listening carefully.

"I know my father. I know the way he thinks and the strings he pulls to keep me away from any threat. I've told you, it's him, not me. I've argued with him about this, but he simply ignores it. You know how he makes me feel, we've talked about it other times."

Danny nodded. "Okay, I understand, Martin."

"I know that although the doctors hadn't authorized it, you were visited by some internal affairs agents," Martin finally started.

"Uhm…yes, I…I was very confused then. I wasn't thinking clearly. Martin I…I know that statement…" Danny hesitated. "…that statement probably…"

"I've read it, and I also read the corrections you made later, once the ballistic results were clear, which says a lot about you. We've never talked about it and you can't imagine how much it hurt me that you thought I could have shot you. But your physical condition, the confusion of that place, the fact that nobody else saw anything but me, I…I understood. I understood because I also thought that maybe I had shot you. How were you not going to have doubts it?"

Danny could have explained to him the consequences that perception of the facts had over him, but fortunately that was a matter between Dr. Harris and him. But he felt relieved that Martin would understand his point of view.

"We should have talked about this before. It's obvious. I didn't know you had read those reports, I'm so sorry. I could have explained to you that I never said that I was convinced it was you, but…surely it looked like that. I'm sorry." Danny said upset.

"I read them when I started to suspect about Riley. I remembered how angry Jack was when he learnt that you had been interrogated in the hospital without authorization or another person with you. The dates matched and I thought that was the key. I'm sure my father sent Riley then, to watch over me and keep me away from you, to watch you and know first any possible action you could take against me. It's…it's shameful. I didn't think about it. When I saw Riley, a former friend from Washington, who I had studied with, I was surprised but I didn't think about any of this. He was the son of the National Security Director and I thought that was the reason he had gotten the job. But now I know it's not. Now I know that it was my father who put him there in your place."

"Have you asked your father?" Danny observed. "Martin, maybe you're wrong. I don't think your father…"

"It's like that, Danny," Martin interrupted him. "Joe Riley is here to cut your steps. He took your place, your desk, insultingly removed your stuff and made it look like you were never around. His lack of sensitivity should have warned us, but we didn't realize it. We were just worried, assuming that something wrong had happened and you wouldn't come back with us. Then we learned about your leg and the poor chances you had and we didn't realize that it had happened later. Danny, it's not your leg what's stopping you from coming back, it's Riley and my father is behind this. Do you see how easy it is?"

"Easy?"

"I just have to call him, tell him what miserable garbage he is and demand from him to give you back your job."

"If your father has got that much power, I don't know how you are going to get it so easily." To Danny things didn't look that easy as Martin was saying.

"I'm his son." Martin replied.

The room's curtain was opened and a nurse entered. She checked Danny's pulse and temperature. She wrote down the results and after checking the IV and introducing some medication in it, she smiled. Danny smiled back and Martin couldn't help but roll his eyes. Was Danny flirting with the nurse?

"What?" Danny exclaimed as soon as she left.

"Come on, Danny, what happened with that girl from AA?" Martin reprimanded.

"I'm just her sponsor, it's not a good idea to date someone who has the same problems as me, don't you think?"

"Well, it looks like there's something between you two, when I see you talking at the meetings," Martin said.

Danny remained silent, which surprised Martin. "Oh, so there's something else, then."

"No, no there's not, Martin." Danny repeated, before the insistent look of his friend.

"Okay, whatever you say," Martin remained silent for a moment. He had lost the thread of the conversation and didn't know how to come back to the matter. Danny, on his side, didn't look like he would like to continue but… "We should talk about this Danny." 

"No, I don't think so, I don't think it's necessary, Martin. Like you said, we're friends, we're family. I don't know what that is for you but it means a lot to me and sure, I don't need anything else. It's not worth it, right?" Danny closed his eyes. Definitely, the nurse had introduced a medication into the IV because he was feeling asleep. He grimaced.

"What's wrong?" Martin asked.

"I…I'm feeling dizzy."

Martin stood up and opening the curtain, made a gesture to a doctor who had treated Danny, and he walked in immediately. Checking Danny's vitals and the wound he explained "Everything is all right. But you better rest for a while. Sleeping will be good for you and your friend will welcome it, as well," at the same time he encouraged Martin to leave the curtained room.

"Okay, pal, you heard the doctor. Rest and I'll come back later and see if you can leave, alright? Don't you dare leave by yourself." Martin warned him.

"Don't worry, I don't plan to move," a sleepy Danny replied.

Martin left the room worried but the doctor calmed him down. "He'll be okay; it's just a sedative to help him relax. The rest will help him to recover his strength."

"Thanks, Doctor," Martin said relieved.

He had to talk to his father; he would do it for Danny, to expose Riley, for the team. Confronting his father had always been difficult but he was very tired of being treated as if he was a child.

Entering the FBI building with that idea in mind, he headed for the twelfth floor. The trail of blood from Danny's wrist had been cleaned but the people still talked about the confrontation. He wondered what they would think about his friend and felt hurt to hear some fragments he didn't want to confront. There was too much tension in the air and time would put everyone in they're places.

Heading to the bullpen, he realized the figure with his back to him, looked extremely familiar. "Will?" he asked.

It had been years since he'd seen him last, even though he almost met him again during last summer when he vacationed in Washington and had visited his parents with Sarah. He remembered that day and the sadness on Sarah's eyes when they didn't meet up.

"Martin," greeted Will without any enthusiasm in his voice.

Martin remembered what Matt had told them; that he barely smiled anymore. What was he doing here?

"What…what are you doing here? Did something happen?" Martin asked, worried about Sarah as well.

Will smiled. "No, no. It's nothing. I've just come to meet with Sarah," he replied.

"Sure. She felt sad when she couldn't see you last summer," Martin said. "In your parents' house in Washington," he cleared noticing that Will looked confused.

"And, how do you know that?" Will asked sharply.

"I was there also, Will. I don't know if you've talked to her but…well…Sarah and me…"

"I know; you're together. Sarah told me. I suppose I have to congratulate you two," he continued without any emotion.

Martin looked at him confused, not knowing what else to say.

"Uhm…listen, if I can help you, I…I work right here and…" Martin wasn't sure if meeting his sister was the reason Will was here.

Will smiled but it wasn't a friendly one.

"Is your mom okay? I remember she was sickly…" Martin remembered then.

"You know better than me," Will said.

Martin tried to change the subject, then, but at that moment, someone from the bullpen exclaimed, "William Gordon and Martin Fitzgerald together again!" Martin closed his eyes as he noticed Riley nearly running toward them.

"I better leave, I shouldn't be here," Will said suddenly, who had paled when he saw Riley. "I didn't know you work together. Bye Martin, I'll see you."

"Wait, Will." Martin didn't know what to do so he pulled out a card and handed it to his former friend. "I'd like to talk to you. I think there are some things we should talk about."

"Sure," Will said. Turning back, Will disappeared from his sight, before Riley reached them.

"Wow, what happened to him?" he exclaimed.

"Nothing," Martin replied upset. At the last moment he thought that Will would hug him, but there was Riley to ruin everything.

Martin left the call to his father in the air. However, he remembered one of the last times he had met Will Gordon, when their future was still to be decided.

_Flashback_

_**Washington, October 1991**_

_William Gordon drained in a gulp the whiskey he had been served and with a gesture of his hand, he asked the bartender to fill the glass again. This one just did what the young man was asking, while he observed the group of journalists sharing a table near the counter made it impossible to hear comments, but their body language made clear that they were talking about Will's behavior._

_Realizing the uncomfortable situation for the bartender, Will turned his head and raising his hand, he greeted the journalists with a smile, making sure he would be the big cover for the gossip local newspapers the following morning. Thinking about it, he burst into laughter before emptying the whiskey glass once again. He wasn't drunk, not at all, but a little bit of playing would be great._

_Outside the hotel's café, in one of the halls used for big conferences, his father, George Gordon, ex-senator turned to philanthropist, did what he knew to do the best: convince the audience to empty their pockets for a good cause._

_Will knew the conference perfectly, his father's words resounded once and again in his ears, and he couldn't help but what one far day looked like the loyalist of the causes, had become along the years a speech full of beautiful words and loyal purposes that systematically were denied to him, his son._

_So, that's why in that bar, far from all the splendor surrounding his father's job, Will tightened the cord that still kept them together. He didn't care about his father's thinking, the argument that surely he'd receive the following morning, when red with rage, after opening the pages of any newspaper to savor the success, he'd find a picture of his oldest son getting 'drunk' at the counter of the hotel's café and ruining the image of the good family and great work done by the Gordon family.._

_At twenty-two years old, Will had decided to leave his family, disappearing and forgetting them, but he wasn't able to do it yet. Just one person kept the knot strong that held them together, even if he wasn't happy, and that was his sister, Sarah._

_It wasn't the feminine voice of his sister that he heard then, the clicking heels didn't match with Sarah's familiar heels. Still, it was close. That night would be memorable, he thought at the realization. Alice Cooper approached him with the glass in her hand that the bartender had poured whiskey into again. Her dark green dress adjusted to her spectacular figure and made the journalists focus their attention on her. The short length of the skirt and the high heels, showed legs which likely had some kind of insurance policy and Alice Cooper was plenty aware of it. She sat down on a chair beside the young man, crossing her legs like Sharon Stone in Basic Instinct and softly touched Will's knee, who was looking at her having the funniest moment of the day. He didn't know what was going on then; you never knew what would it happened when Alice was around. It wasn't the first time she made the temperature rise up, just to leave as if nothing had happened, moving his body in a gesture you never knew if it was a gift or a curse._

_The bartender filled the glasses again, as Alice, leaned over Will, whispering something he didn't understand, mumbled by the sensations that woman provoked in him._

_Will and Alice had met in the Library of the university they were both attending, while they prepared for final exams and immediately became great friends. Beautiful, cheerful and with a light easy conversation, the young student thought he had found the woman of his life. They shared not only their passion for architecture but also, any new aspect of their lives they found out that they matched perfectly. Will moved his personal effects from the room at the students Residence he shared with another classmate to the place where Alice was living, alone at that moment, since her roommate had gone back to Oregon for a family matter important enough to leave the studies in the middle of the Trimester. So there they were, free to make explode their love, their fantasies, sex, books, future plans and some mockup half done and losing its balance as the moments barely gave credit to their good luck._

_Eight months later, the reality slapped Will in his face, a reality he wasn't ready for. "It's not important, Will. It doesn't mean anything, it's got nothing to do with what we share," she said as she put on makeup; her lips with a provocative dark red lipstick joining a non-less provocative dress. "You have to understand; it's the only way that I can pay for my studies."_

_But he couldn't share her; he couldn't understand how she let herself be used like that, even if the reason was one he should understand. His rejection was instinctive; he wasn't able to approach her without feeling totally blocked and disconcerted, thinking if his scale of values was obsolete._

_And all the magic vanished all of a sudden._

_But when Alice moved away from that counter in a provocative way, just like she had approached when she'd arrived, Will picked up the card that she had left, and dropping some money as payment of his drink, left the bar following her steps, not even wondering what she was doing in that hotel where his father was probably getting a substantial amount of money to clean his consciousness._

_Two hours later, back at the hall where the guests were enjoying the delicious culinary offering at the hotel, Will spotted Alice hanging onto Mr. Cole's arm, a guy in his sixties whose wife hadn't been able to go with him that night. He sighed as he noticed how comfortable she felt talking to the group. _

_A slap on his back from his brother Matt made him look away and put aside the feelings he had lived some time before with Alice. "Dad's sent me to look for you. I think he realized that you left, so be warned he's not very happy about it." Matt told him._

"_Sure," Will muttered as he averted his eyes down to his shoes for an instant, before fixing his dark eyes onto the Nordic blue eyes of his brother. Matt Gordon was the exact male version of his mother, Ingrid. "Aren't you tired of listening to the same thing every time?" He asked. Matt shrugged his shoulders and gave him an answer which made Will shiver. "We've lived of this; we have to show a good image." _

"_One thing is clear," Will replied. "We already know who's going to take over the business." His bad humor was increasing, while during his way to the table where his parents should be, known and not very known people who seemed to know everything about him, stopped by greeting, shaking hands and congratulating him for the fantastic work the Gordon family made through the Caroline Foundation._

_He felt the cold blue eyes of his mother on him, as he approached and all his confidence faltered in a fraction of a second. Am I drunk? He wondered, hiding his nervousness, he approached in a casual manner and kissed her on the cheek. "Hi, mom," he said smiling lightly. _

"_Your father is looking for you," she replied as her greeting, pointing to her left, where his father talked animatedly with another man of similar appearance, accompanied by a young man that Will knew pretty well, since they had shared the strict education from Macfarlane School and the same problem: the obsessive determination of their parents in making them better copies of themselves. It was clear that both Will Gordon and his friend Martin Fitzgerald had a difficult time dealing with that situation. The absentminded expression of his friend as he tried unsuccessfully to look interested, made Will smile with a smirk before recalling the matter that took him beside his father. Standing beside him, discreetly, speechless, he waited until his father noticed him._

_The forced smile of George Gordon was as uncomfortable to Martin as the slap to his son's back, made him jump sharply. "Will, my son!" he exclaimed forcing even more the uncomfortable situation. "Do you remember my good friend Victor Fitzgerald and his son, Martin?" _

"_Sure," Will nodded, as he shook Victor's hand. "Mr. Fitzgerald, I hope you're having a nice evening," he politely said. He smiled at Martin. "It's been a long time," he commented. Will was going to say something, when his father spoke. _

"_That's true; Will is very busy working on his projects. He's going to open an architectural studio and that takes dedication and a lot of time…so much dedication that he doesn't even have time to hear the speech I prepared for this evening. By the way, Victor, do you think that Martha could join Ingrid for the Christmas campaign? You know that time is so delicate with our children and any help would be welcome."_

_With relief, Will and Martin observed their fathers immersed in a conversation they weren't part of, forgetting them completely. Will made a face and suggested "Let's drink something," pointing toward the counter, far enough from the place where they were at the moment. _

"_Sure," Martin agreed. "I see you're doing well for yourself," he added._

"_Not at all," Will replied. "My father is exaggerating, as usual. Actually, I'm seriously thinking about leaving Washington."_

"_Really? What is your father going to say about that?" Martin asked._

"_I don't know and I don't care. I think he'll feel relieved about not having me around, ruining his…fame." Will smiled thinking about Alice Cooper, the bar and the journalists. "And what about you, what are you doing?"_

"_I'm going to Quantico. No, it's not about my father. I like the idea of working for the FBI and maybe I'll get lucky and I'll be sent far enough from here." Martin explained._

"_Uff, I don't know, doing the same thing your father does…taking into consideration his career…" Will started._

"_That's his life and I don't have the same idea of the job. Of course I don't pretend to have him influence my career. I hope he stays away."_

_Will burst into laughter. "Special Agent Martin Fitzgerald. I think that just mentioning your last name, they're going to be suspicious of you."_

"_My father is nothing."_

"_Wow, no…your father is the boss, don't be that naïve, and he's taking more power. He'll be the next FBI Director and then he'll jump into politics."_

"_Is that how you know my father is better than me?" Martin said sharply and upset._

"_Come on, Martin, I know my father, and my father's friends. You see that coming or time will tell."_

"_Well, anyway, I'll write my own way." Martin insisted._

"_So, good luck with it," Will smiled, raising his glass._

"_It won't be difficult; in fact my father is pretty upset with my decision. You know, nothing I do is good enough for him, I don't know what the hell he wants from me." Martin said. Feeling uncomfortable, he changed the subject. "I haven't seen your sister, Sarah. Didn't she come?"_

"_Yes, she did. I don't know where she's at now," Will replied looking around the wide hall. "I don't think she left, maybe she's with that stupid Parker guy. God, I can't stand that sweet-talking jerk."_

_Martin laughed. "You declared war on him since we were at Macfarlane School and I see you haven't changed."_

"_No, and I don't get what my sister sees in him." Will replied with a grimace. "And my parents. But well, Sarah is dad's favorite one, the lawyer of the family. And Matt seems very interested in this thing." Will made a gesture with his arms embracing the beautiful hall of the hotel._

_Maybe he had spoken too much but what the hell!_

_Martin observed him seriously. Sometimes he'd like to have the strength his friend had to confront his father. Rumor has it that several years ago, when he was a teenager, Will had challenged his father in a way that the consequences of it had been devastating for their relationship and had caused a rift in the family; where some siblings were on his father side and others were on his. Although Will was alone at the time, things had softened along the years._

"_What are you going to do?" Martin asked._

"_Well, I have to finish something here, but a Professor from the university has got a contact in San Francisco. They could have a job for me in his studio and they're glad to get some new graduates from the university so I wrote them and I'm awaiting his answer. If I'm lucky, in six months I'll leave."_

_Martin whistled softly. "That's not what your father was saying earlier. And San Francisco… you're going to be out of his radar. He better stop talking about your future or he's going to be left in evidence."_

"_Sure," Will said distractedly. "For the moment, I'm just making his blood pressure rise." All of a sudden, he felt better. "Don't miss the social report tomorrow in the local newspapers. Maybe he'll only feel relief the day I leave and won't pray for me to come back."_

"_What about your mom?" Martin just happened to ask._

"_Well…that's something I'll have to learn to deal with. I don't know how she'll react but she always supported my father. We're different like that, Martin. Your parents love you, their way, but it's it. And you love them. I lost that connection with them a long time ago, if I'm still here, it's because of Sarah. She is the only one that I care about."_

"_Come on, Will, you know it's not like that," Martin felt some sadness for his fried; although he understood him. His parents, especially Victor, looked to be interested in Martin reaching his sort of status. For the rest, it was like he wasn't around. And his mother was always devoting her life to any charitable cause."_

"_Yeah…well…" Will replied hesitantly. "Listen, am I the only one who thinks that this is pathetic?"_

_Martin doubted. He wasn't sure if Will was talking about their conversation or the place where they were. In any case, he hoped that Will was referring to their conversation. He couldn't help but feel vulnerable when his father was around and that disgusted him considerably._

_End of flashback_

…_._

In his office, Jack picked up the phone without identifying the number that was calling. "Jack Malone," he said in his usual professional tone.

"It's Will Gordon. I've just been to your office and I've seen so many known faces that my father surely is taking a plane and he'll be at your office sooner or later."

"Calm down, Mr. Gordon. Will…why did you come here? I thought we agreed that…"

"It's been eight months, Agent Malone, eight months! You told me that you'd call." The uncontrolled tone of William Gordon convinced Jack that what he had been delaying for a while couldn't wait anymore.

It was true that the investigation had taken him more time than he had thought, collecting and revising all the documents that Lukas Wyler had given to him, documents he should be familiarized with, know and deal with the best possible way. It was the only way to talk to Will Gordon.

"I haven't forgotten, Will. All the opposite, I've found some documents, not everything but enough and I'll have something for you soon. Calm down, please. I wouldn't like to discuss this matter over the phone." Jack spoke paused and the clearest he could.

"I'm at the entrance of the FBI building," Will said. "I need answers, Agent Malone," he continued.

"And you'll get them, when it's time. Why the urgency? Has something happened?"

"No…" Will replied confused. He began to feel like an idiot. "It's just that…I thought that…"

"Who has seen you around here?" Jack asked trying to be more practical.

"Fitzgerald, Martin Fitzgerald. He asked me what I was doing here. Of course I didn't tell him, but he'll surely talk to my sister. And Joe Riley." He added.

Jack remembered the friendship between Will and Martin. He thought about it and how to use it. "Well, Will, calm down, go home. I promise I'll call you back, but I need some time."

Hanging up, Jack rubbed a hand over his face in a worried gesture, before opening the draw and picking up the files Lukas Wyler had given him.

The three complete boxes of documents from the time Mario Alvarez spent in Cuba, reports, photographs from Social Services, of the family, the kids and even any personal effects, were hidden at his house, only like silent proof of what the folder had on his desk was the truth.

It had been complicated, hard enough to read the contents. Looking at the photographs and reports from the boxes didn't tell Jack anything new, and he decided to keep it, only if they asked for it and wanted to put names, dates and faces to the events written in the files. But he expected that wouldn't happen.


	10. Chapter 10

**Breaking the rule. Chapter 10.**

"Have you talked to your father?" It was Wyler who was asking. He had walked into the bullpen quickly and headed toward Martin's direction. As he took off the coat and removed the rest of the snow, he threw an inquisitive look at the agent, ignoring everything and everybody around.

"It won't be necessary," Martin replied. He didn't know the kind of agreement Jack Malone, Lukas Wyler and his father had made, but as soon as he started talking about Danny and Riley, he had cut him off with a simple "forget it, that matter has already been resolved. Taylor won't need to be worried about anything."

"Well. Hey, you!" he called Joe Riley, who frowned. "I want you out, now."

"What?" The agent exclaimed surprised.

"You work in Missouri, don't you? You don't have anything to do here anymore. Take your things." Wyler ordered with such a tone of authority that Joe Riley didn't doubt a second to believe him.

"I haven't been informed," he said, as collecting his stuff, thinking about heading to Jack Malone immediately.

Lukas Wyler handed him a letter. "Here you have it."

"Who are you?" Riley asked.

"Go back home, Son. Your work here has finished."

The fatherly tone bothered and confused Riley, while he read the letter signed by Deputy Director Victor Fitzgerald. Joe Riley didn't like Missouri, but the letter was clear. He would return to his former job.

Danny had opened his office door and observed the scene, surprised. What was happening there? What was Wyler doing there? And, why had Martin told him that it would be an important day?

…

**Two weeks earlier…**

Jack had finished reading the last part of the Alvarez's family file. Picking up the phone he started dialing a number, but raising his head and looking at the bullpen, he changed his mind. Hanging up, he stood up and walked into the bullpen.

"How is Danny?" Sam asked, worried. "Martin told us what happened. I can't believe it."

"Danny's fine, that's what the doctor said, isn't it, Martin?" Jack replied.

"Yes, he had an ugly cut in his wrist and was bleeding profusely, but he's okay. He's under observation because his vital signs were unstable and he's getting some sleep after the sedative they injected him with. So he should be sleeping like an angel right now," he said with a smile.

"Like an angel? Surely not," Vivian laughed. It was something they needed, things had to be okay.

"He'll be back tomorrow morning. And guys, be careful with your comments, please. Danny…I don't think he can handle the pressure he's getting. It's not fair that he's been treating so harshly, when he only is doing his job." The warning went to all the team, but Jack was only looking at Riley.

"Yes Sir," he said.

"Well, Martin, I want you in my office, as soon as you can." Jack continued. "Viv, take the lead, there's an important matter I have to solve and it'll take some time."

"Of course," she agreed.

Martin followed Jack, exchanging an intriguing look with his colleagues.

"Sit down," Jack ordered.

As he did, Martin observed the old folder on his boss' desk. He tried to read the title but he couldn't discern the letters. He wondered if that folder was the reason Jack wanted to talk to him.

"Where do you know William Gordon from?" Jack asked, even though he already knew the answer.

The question caught him off guard. It couldn't be a coincidence that he had seen him a while ago and now Jack was asking about him.

"Lifelong, we grew up together. Why?"

"Do you get along with him usually?" Jack asked then.

"Jack, what's the matter? I guess you already know the answer to that. It's been fifteen years since I saw him for the last time, until I saw him a while ago here and now you're asking me about Will?"

"He was here, last year. He asked me to do something for him." Jack put his hand on the folder and got the answer he expected.

"Oh my God… Jack. Listen, Will has always been obsessed with that. His entire life. He cut all the threads with his family, went away and lost all his friends for it. And he doesn't look to be happy, despite of me knowing that he has a family and a successful job."

"And you know that after the short meeting you had earlier?" Jack asked.

"No, I know because his sister told me, Sarah Parker. Will didn't tell me anything. He just said that he was going to meet his sister. But now, I think that he came to see you."

"Is Sarah his sister?" Jack asked. He didn't expect that, not someone so close to them. He remembered the photographs of the two year old little girl he had seen in the boxes he kept at his home. Sonia Alvarez. Not even their names had been respected.

"Yes, why? Jack, what's going on?"

"I need your help, Martin. What this folder contains is what your friend has been looking for all his life. But Martin, it's…it's complicated, for him and the rest of his family; at least the family he left. I need your help because you have become the connection between them, and I'm realizing that connection is closer than I had imagined."

Martin swallowed hard. "Jack, Will…I don't think he trusts me. When he saw me he almost panicked, he greeted me so coldly. He's not the friend I remembered anymore…"

"He probably has his reasons and probably made a mistake in the conclusions, but I need you talk to him."

"I can try through Sarah," Martin thought aloud. "She…she also has to know…I guess. I don't know…I don't know how she's going to react. She always tried to convince Will to stop and move on, but he reproached her to support their parents. Despite of it, they kept the contact, somewhat. Although, I know that Sarah hasn't seen him for a long time."

"Martin, Will and Sarah were taken as a warranty by the Gordons'," Jack explained to him, slowly.

"What?" Martin paled.

"I can tell you or you can read it. But this is what they are going to confront. And not only them. Have you ever heard of Operation Kangaroo?"

Martin shook his head. And then Jack told him the story Lukas Wyler had explained to him in that café at the Federal Square, a story that he knew in all its extension and could tell from the beginning to the end, although it wasn't what he was telling Martin. He only pretended to make him accomplice of the difficult situation he was in.

"What…what happened to his biological family?" Martin asked, still disturbed by the news.

"Will and Sarah were definitely adopted in 1984, a few months later their parents died. Their oldest brother was already eighteen and the matter about the little one…Gordons reasoned he wouldn't be a good influence over the family they had created, so he ended going in and out from foster homes, home centers…you can imagine."

"That's cruel," Martin murmured. "But, where are they? How are you going to find them?"

"I don't need to. Two years ago, the oldest brother told the little one something about this story. He was sick and the doctors were trying to find if the illness was a genetic matter. The little brother didn't know about the story but the oldest asked him to look for any sibling.

"And they contacted you," Martin guessed, surprised.

"Not exactly. The oldest died at the end of 2004 without his brother being able to find any sibling. He dropped the search but later, I don't know why, he restarted, contacting with a person specialized in that matter, someone who knew the matter well in first person, Lukas Wyler."

"I know him," Martin frowned. "Lukas Wyler was here. He was helping Danny to prepare for the BAR exam…" Martin froze. "What did you mean by me being the connection between them?" he nearly yelled.

Jack nodded. "That connection. Do you understand why I need your help?"

"But then, Rafi…"

"He died. Danny didn't tell us, it happened while he was suspended, as he was trying to find those documents. The documents you're seeing on my desk."

"Does Danny know the content?"

"Something, Lukas Wyler gave him a partial folder, some information about what he was looking for omitting some aspects of it. Still, he found a report from Social Services that affected him deeply. That's why he gave the folder back to Wyler and didn't want to know anything else."

"And now you have to tell him. Danny. Will. And Sarah. I can't believe it. What…What should I know? What should I tell them?"

"You have to talk to your father. Tell him that Lukas Wyler and I want to talk to him. We'll go to Washington if it's necessary. You can tell him it's about Gordon. He'll understand."

"He fired Danny," Martin reasoned. He was furious and ashamed.

Jack didn't confirm it. "It won't happen again."

"If what you told me about Gordon is true, this could end the Foundation they sponsor," Martin said. "If Will knew, or Danny, if someone would say…"

"Indeed," Jack confirmed. "That's why it's so important to Gordon to keep the secret. But it's nonsense and you'll agree with me that there are two people that have suffered too much the consequences of saving George Gordon's ass."

"How did you get so much information?" Martin asked.

"I also talked to Lukas Wyler. I found his card in Danny's home. I remembered that I had seen it and looked for it while Danny was in the hospital. Did you know that Will also asked Wyler for help?"

Martin shook his head.

"He was seventeen, Wyler told me. Your father and his were coworkers while Will's father and yours…that was a war."

"Surely it was when Wyler got angry with everybody and left, he even left the FBI. I never knew what happened and Will never told me. He wouldn't trust me, damn it."

…

Martin didn't know which of the tasks Jack had asked him to do was the most difficult, if dealing with his father, trying to find Will, ignoring the situation being with Danny or talking to Sarah. His heart broke just thinking about it.

Driving back to his home, Martin was trying different versions of questions and possible answers from his father. That would be the first thing to do. He had to call him, not to tell him what he had been talking to Danny about at the hospital, but something completely new.

"Victor Fitzgerald, please. I'm his son," he announced to his father's secretary.

"Hi Martin, how are you doing?" She asked.

"Fine, fine," he replied.

She felt the urgency in the voice of the agent and didn't prolong the conversation. "He's on the line right now."

He hadn't finished thanking the secretary when he heard his father's voice. "What's going on, Martin. I've been told about some fights at your office. I hope you're not involved, son, I've told you that…"

"Dad, I'm not involved in anything. Listen, this is important. I need confirmation for a meeting."

"Martin, you know how busy I am…"

"I've told you it's important. Jack Malone and Lukas Wyler want to meet you to talk about something important. Please, tell me when and where."

"Why don't they call? Wyler? Malone?" he asked.

"They're working on something else. Dad, it's a bad situation, please, trust me once in your life. I think you're supporting the wrong person."

"What are you talking about?" Martin noticed the hesitation in his father's voice, something he wasn't used to.

"It's about George Gordon."

A long silence followed when Martin said the name. Martin guessed his father would be thinking about an answer. "Dad?"

"I think it was inevitable to happen someday. Sure, I'll talk to them. I have to go to New York in two days, tell Malone I'll pass by his office."

Martin sighed in relieved. "Sure. Thanks, dad." He didn't know why but he was grateful to him, he only prayed for him acting on trust, without knowing what Jack had revealed to him.

Sarah and Will…Maybe Sarah, it would be easier talking to Will, he would be ready if he finally put an end to his fight. He thought about all the years when nobody believed him and he felt sad for him. Will…and Danny.

Looking at the time, he realized Sarah would arrive sooner than later. Nervously, he paced around the apartment, not knowing what to do. Opening the fridge he prepared a sandwich with almost everything he found, even though his stomach wouldn't appreciate any food. He left the sandwich and sat on the couch, took the remote and looked for some channel, not finding any remotely good for him at the moment. Finally, he stopped in a sports channel, but he didn't even pay attention to it.

The sound of the keys opening the door made him react. Suddenly, he thought he could have created a more comfortable situation, but the rest of the sandwich, the untidy cushions, the basketball game on TV…it wasn't the best of welcome.

She looked at him in surprise. "What are you doing home so early? What's going on?"

He didn't know what to say. "I've learned something about Danny, what a shame."

"He's okay, isn't he?" She continued.

Martin nodded. "Yeah, it was a lot of blood for a small cut that's healing well. Sarah…we have to talk," he added inviting her to sit down beside him.

"What's going on, Martin?" She asked. Martin didn't bear the worried expression of Sarah. She wouldn't imagine what he was going to tell her and the way her life would change in a second.

"Today, I saw Will. At the office. He told me…he told me he was going to meet you but I think he was lying. I noticed him uncomfortable about seeing me."

"I'll call Matt. Surely it's about mom…" she began.

"No, it's not that, your mom is okay. Sarah," Martin took her hands in his, "you know why Will left, the fights with his father and the way you asked him to ignore it…do you remember?"

"Of course, yes…it's not that I didn't understand him, it's just that he got sick every time he tried searching for answers. He wasn't able to move on and take the reins of his life. You know that I only intended to protect him. "What was he doing at the FBI? Don't tell me that…oh, no, God…Matt told me he was fine, even though he was nervous the day he visited mom and then he left so quick…" the tears reached her eyes at the memories. Thinking about the unnecessary suffering of her older brother hurt as much as the impossibility of helping him.

"I know your intentions were good. But Sarah…Sarah, listen to me." Martin pressed her arms to make her pay attention to what he was trying to say. "Will was right, he was right about his demands, his memories, his brothers, your brothers."

Sarah had stopped crying and looked at him terrified.

"Sarah, I need you understand this new reality, please, take it easy. You'll understand it won't be horrible, you'll get Will back and you'll recognize someone else, someone you'll identify as your brother but, please, you have to understand."

"And Will…What am I going to tell Will? No, it can't be…I don't get it. Why would they hide that from us?"

Martin feared that question. He didn't know what to say.

"Martin?"

"Take it easy, Sarah, just try to understand. I don't have much information to give you and this is not the best place either."

"What do you know?"

"I only know they are studying the best way to explain what happened. Sarah, I know you trust any of this was true, but this is the reality and I need you understand, alright?"

Sarah didn't reply; she just dropped her head on his chest trying to calm down with the sound of Martin's beating heart. She didn't say a word. Her eyes filled with tears as the memories of her childhood came back to her mind. Will always demanding answers, always demanding the return back to home.

…..

"You didn't come back to take me out of the hospital. That's not a friend, you lied to me." Danny smiled as he swished his coffee cup.

"I'm sorry, Jack asked me to do some stuff…" Martin excused himself. He couldn't help but look at his colleague a different way. The story Jack had told him, the conversation with Sarah the day before and the one he still had to have with Will…having Danny in front of him and couldn't tell him a word, was difficult. But Jack had told him that Danny was his business.

"He gave me his orange sweater," Danny protested.

Martin burst into laughter. He remembered that sweater Jack had in his closet at the office and nobody knew why.

"Wow, I'm so sorry," he said sitting down beside him. "How are you doing?"

"Fine, it was…you know…" Danny tried to smile but somehow he failed.

"Are you okay?" Martin asked. He needed Danny to be okay in order to assimilate what would happen in the next several days.

"I don't know Martin. I don't know what to do, I think things are out of place but, I don't know what the next step is that I should take."

Martin doubted. Maybe Jack had told him something. Maybe he was talking about the job. "Have you been to the doctor? What did they say about your leg?" he tried.

Danny shrugged his shoulders. "They want to try something new that could make my leg recover almost one hundred percent. So they say. But it's a testing experiment, so there are no guaranties at all."

"And, what are you going to do? If you recover you could come back with us, for real."

"You told me the problem wasn't my leg but Riley. And you were going to talk to your father."

"I talked to him." Martin suspected that the conversations with Jack and Malone would include Riley any moment, and Jack wouldn't let his chance fly away.

"Danny, I'm going to ask you a favor. It's not big deal; I only want you to keep cool. I have a feeling that in the next several days, things are going to change a lot."

"Wow, your father gave you confidential information?" Danny smiled. "Spit it out."

Martin smiled. "You just stay cool, alright?"

Danny stared at him. "I think…I think that Sarah is changing you. I can't find a way of teasing you like before. I'm glad for you; I don't think I've told you. She seems like a great person."

"Yeah, she is." Martin wasn't able to add anything else. With the information he had and biting his tongue, it was complicated to talk with Danny. "Listen, I'm going back to work."

"Yeah, me too, do you know what's going on with Jack? Vivian told me that she's taking the lead for a while."

"Yes…eh…he said that he had some business to resolve and that he'd be busy." Martin didn't lie, just told a half truth.

…..

He hadn't talked to Will, and he was determined to do it that morning.

Sarah had explained to him that her brother was living in Tribeca, so the search for his home was easy. However, the case Vivian brought to the bullpen, kept him busy throughout the day and it wasn't until late at seven in the evening, when he could finally go to his friend's home.

"What's going on?" Sam asked him. "You've been distracted all day and looking at the time."

"Nothing, I had an appointment today and…"

"An appointment? With who? Jack maybe?"

"What?"

"He's acting like you since yesterday, in a 'hiding something' mode and I don't know why. And now, you."

"No, it's not with Jack, it's an old friend, from Washington. We agreed to meet today, but I don't know if I can. That's all."

At 6:30 PM they had to begin revising five boxes of letters. Sam noticed Martin's worried face and suddenly she got an idea. Seeing that Danny was still in his office, she walked toward it and she opened the door after knocking softly on the door. "Danny, do you have a moment?"

"Sure, Sam. Come in," Danny replied surprised. If he remembered correctly, she had never been there. "What can I do for you?"

Sam went into his office and felt strange. Since he had been back, Danny had stayed working in that office and that was a new moment for her. She realized then the distance they had taken from their colleague, although she actually didn't feel like that. "Eh…listen, Martin has to leave, it's a personal business, something about a friend, he told me. I don't know, I see him worried and we have to revise a lot of documents. Do you think that you could do it for him so he can take that time for his friend? If you're not busy, of course."

"No, I'm not," he said standing up. "I'll give you a hand."

"Out," he ordered as soon as he stood beside Martin.

"What?" he asked.

"I'm taking care of this," Danny replied. "Sam says that you have to leave, so take the time you need, I can do this."

Martin looked at Sam and then back to Danny. "What about Vivian?"

"She won't care, as long as the work is done." Danny replied.

"And Riley?"

"Martin, go!" Danny and Sam exclaimed. And they laughed.

Martin remained looking at them for a second. If they only knew…"Thanks, guys," he said and picking up his coat, he left quickly.

Sam and Danny exchanged a funny look while Martin left. "Well," Danny said collecting a bunch of letters from a box, "What are we looking for?"

"These are letters from fans," Sam replied as she handed him a sheet. "The calligrapher gave us this list of typos. This is what we have to search."

"Letters?" he exclaimed surprised. "I thought we only had to look for the crazy one," he added with a smirk.

"We'll find a coincidence for sure," Sam smiled. "Listen Danny, I…before…well, it's just that…"

Danny looked at her and smiled. "You had never entered my cave."

"No, eh…I've realized how distant we've been all this time," she said, looking for an excuse. "But…we…actually it's not true, isn't it?"

"Of course not, Sam. I haven't been very friendly either. This job is…" he looked at his office, noticing the difference of perspective, "it's like it's destroying the positive side of anyone, you feel alone and so far from everything and everyone…" Danny replied thoughtful.

"Have you thought about leaving?" she asked.

"Yeah, sometimes," he admitted.

She looked at him trying to keep her sadness for her. "I understand you, Danny; I don't think I'd be able to assume a challenge like Jack put on the table for you."

"I didn't think too much about it, then, I didn't have options. It was that or I was out. Plus, his enthusiasm didn't give the any other chance. He had ordered to make the office even before talking to me. I couldn't say no.

"And, what are you going to do now? After what happened with Channing, how are you doing?"

"I don't know, I haven't thought about it. But Martin told me this morning to keep cool for a while…ring a bell?"

Sam raised an eyebrow. "No, but Jack has been acting strange since yesterday, and I don't know why."

"Martin thinks that Riley is the reason I can't work with you, and not my leg. I don't know what he's trying to do; he told me he was going to talk to his father…I don't know. I don't like it. I like to make my own decisions and not expect any favors."

"It's not a favor, Danny. You weren't here when Riley joined us. You didn't see how he invaded your space, almost without contempt. I won't forget it, ever, and I haven't forgiven him," Sam wanted to be clear at that point.

"I see," Danny said feeling embarrassed. "Well, we better start working or Vivian is going to get truly angry," he added, while he began to compare the first letter with the typos.

"Yeah," Sam sighed, doing the same.


	11. Chapter 11

**Breaking the rule. Chapter 11.**

Martin stopped the car in front of Will's home and stayed quiet for a moment. He needed to calm his nerves and think about the best way to act. Talking to his father and Sarah had worked out but Will was going to be a difficult part.

When he finally got out of the car, 6:15pm was the time he could read on his wristwatch.

He knocked on the door and seconds later he heard a female voice, talking not to him, but the other person inside the house.

"Open, honey, it's Marcia, tell her we'll be there in a second, I'm finishing Victoria's bag!"

Some children exclamations followed the steps to the door. When it was opened, the smiling face of Will Gordon, changed completely, while Victoria took his father's hand and hid behind him. "Martin, what…what are you doing here? Who told you where I live?"

"I work for the FBI, Will," Martin replied. "Can I come in? I have something important to tell you."

"It's late," Will said without moving. Victoria dropped his hand and ran toward her mom who was stepping down. "Who is it, Will?" Martin heard her to ask.

"It's nobody," he replied.

"Will listen, something important has happened…"

"Is Sarah okay?" Will interrupted him with a worried expression.

"No, relax, Sarah's fine. Jack Malone asked me to come."

"Great," Will grimaced but didn't move.

"I know. I've also talked to Sarah. I've had to explain some stuff to her that I know I can ignore with you. But you have to let me in, I'm freezing out here and what I have to tell, is going to take some time." Martin insisted. "Please."

Will stayed hesitating. "Fine, come in."

"Jack asked me to tell you that he's sorry about taking so long with the investigation, but he wants you to know that it has been a very difficult situation," Martin explained, observing Diane sitting down beside her husband and taking his hand joined the conversation. It was clear, she knew the subject.

"Yeah, I know he told me that a lot. I thought it was an excuse and he didn't want to help me," Will said.

"That's because you don't know him," Martin smiled. "Will, I also want to apologize for my father here; although I'm sure he'll talk to you personally. But it's very important this matter is cleared here and now. I would never, ever do anything to interfere with what I know you've been pursuing for years. I never gave up our friendship, although one day you picked up all your things and disappeared. I understood why and I didn't stop making excuses for you, without any luck, I have to say. But I know that my father, wrongly supported yours…"

"I found a letter from him, directed to my father, the day I went to visit my mom. It was in the drawer of his desk. I was looking for pills for mom," Will explained looking at his wife. "In it, Martin's father talked about a Malone and an investigation he shouldn't get worried about. At that moment…at that moment I realized that maybe someone could be looking for me, even though I wasn't sure at all."

"You told me, Will. I told you it was crazy, I thought you had forgotten that matter."

"For a while, but when we were already living here…"

Martin nodded. "Jack took your explanations and the letter you gave him seriously, Will. Because he knew what was going on since it had affected directly one of his agents, who is one of my best friends, also."

"What happened to him?" Diane asked curious.

"He wasn't allowed to investigate, Will's father called mine. My father is the Deputy Director of the FBI, he just picked up the phone and my colleague got a stupid sanction."

"And, you didn't do anything?" She asked.

"I didn't know. Jack Malone told me yesterday. I didn't know anything."

"But it's been so long …"

"Yeah…there are people who know how to keep secrets," Martin smiled. It could be said also by Will. "We can say, Will, that your case is closed, solved. At least about your demands, but I need to warn you. Not everything is fine."

"What do you know?" he asked.

"I don't know anything, well, I know something, but I'm not authorized to tell you anything. That's what we'll do, what Jack will do. He will call you; you'll meet there in the FBI offices. Sarah will be there as well, of course, but I advise you to meet her first and talk about all of this. She…she feels very guilty for not having supported you and…"

Will shook his head. "Please…" he murmured. "How easy it would have been to avoid all this suffering if my father wouldn't have been so stubborn."

"Well, everything has an explanation, Will. Even if it's not what I'd like to hear."

"Am I…am I going to meet my biological parents, my brothers?" Will asked as a shiver ran down his spine.

"You'll meet one of your brothers, yes. Your parents died, shortly before Sarah and you were adopted definitively."

"But, they should be young, what happened?" Diane asked.

"A car accident," Martin replied. "It's confirmed."

"Maybe it was the only truth he said. The last time I tried to get some information from him, he told me they were all dead. I couldn't believe him…"

"Will…I think it's important that you talk to Sarah. You've got time; Jack is still working on it. Call her."

Will nodded. "First thing tomorrow morning, I'll do it."

"Good. So that's what I had to tell you," Martin said standing up. "Jack will call you, or I will."

Will went to the door with him and opened it. "Thank you," he smiled.

"You're welcome," Martin said offering his hand. A hand that this time, Will shook with determination.

Martin left in his car, trying to ignore the headache. And now, Danny. He trusted that Jack would make right his work.

…..

Lukas Wyler looked at the big building and adjusted his coat. At the beginning of November, the cold weather was taking a prominence his bones didn't like at all. This was going to be his fourth solved case, a case that involved him almost personally.

He didn't want to recognize it, but he was nervous, even more when he crossed the main door and took the credential. It was the second time he went into the FBI offices in two weeks, the previous one, joined by the Deputy Director, Victor Fitzgerald.

In the elevator that would take him to the twelfth floor, he revised the line of action. He trust Martin and Jack would have done their job. Filling his lungs with air, right before the doors were opened, he left the elevator quickly and as he usually did, went into the bullpen as if he was the authority. Walking toward Martin, who barely looked at him, he spit: "Have you talked to your father?" Taking Joe Riley out was the first action, like a symbolic matter to start.

Danny observed what was going on and stood up surprised. Opening the door of his office, he stayed looking, as Riley nervously picking up his stuff and left. He remembered Martin's words that morning, who had told him that it'd be an important day, but he couldn't understand what Wyler was doing there.

"Call your girlfriend," Wyler whispered to Martin. Will would arrive any moment, it was time. Martin swallowed as he left the bullpen. He didn't dare look at Danny, who seemed confused at the scene. He just hoped that Jack would have explained to him the situation.

Wyler made a gesture to Danny. "Come with me," he accompanied the gesture.

Danny closed his office door and headed toward Wyler who was walking to the elevators. He almost bumped into Jack who was leaving his own office with a small pushcart where Danny could see three boxes and a folder, a folder that made him freeze.

Vivian and Sam looked at the scene not understanding a word, although Sam suspected that it had to do with the strange behavior Jack and Martin had been showing lately.

Jack didn't know what to do, seeing Danny stopping and getting pale. He didn't think his agent would react that way, he thought that Danny had lived the worst part and would assume the situation easier, but now…he realized he was wrong. He had sent Martin to prepare Sarah and Will, but he didn't do his job with Danny.

"Jack?" he heard the furious voice of Wyler, approaching them. Wyler understood the situation and throwing a furious look to Jack, he took the pushcart and headed to the elevator. "Fix it!" he yelled.

"Go into my office," he told Danny, putting his arm around his shoulders. "Come in, please," he pressured him since Danny didn't move.

Danny entered Jack's office and dropped onto the chair. Leaning his head on the desk, he covered it with his arms, trying to understand what was happening. The fear paralyzed him and didn't let him think clearly.

He felt Jack rubbing his back and calling him by his name once and again, worried, but he wasn't able to react. And he could only feel any relief when the tears he had been fighting won the battle and started rolling down his face. There was no way to stop them.

Jack stayed with him, trying to comfort him, and cursing himself for not preventing the situation, making a gesture to Viv who started entering, to stop. That wasn't the plan he and Lukas Wyler had thought about, but now Wyler was in a room three floors above with all the documents, with Sarah Parker and Will Gordon waiting for an explanation. And he was there, trying that, at least, Danny would get calm. Now, he didn't know what would happen.

…..

Martin joined Will on his way to Sarah's office. Both brother and sister had met and talked about the circumstances they were living, about their attitudes and ready to stay together from now on, no matter the hard news they were going to confront. So that was what Martin had warned.

They barely talked on their way to the place they had agreed to meet. Martin expected Jack and Danny would be there already, but when they arrived, he only saw Lukas Wyler with an upset expression. "Where's Jack?" Martin asked.

"I told him not overestimate your friend, not with this matter. But he didn't listen," he replied in a bad mood. "Will?" he smiled then. "It's been a long time but here we are again," he offered a hand that Will shook nervously.

"Are you behind all of this?" he asked.

"Something like that. Let's come in. Sarah, honey, don't be nervous. We're all friends." Wyler smiled at both brother and sister in a way Martin had never seen before. Wyler's attitude with Will and Sarah was as fatherly as strange for the eccentricities he was used to. He couldn't help but notice that except for his already famous dark coat, he had taken special care about his clothes that day. Thinking about it, he found a closed door inches from his nose.

Martin stayed alone in the corridor. It was then when he realized his own nervousness. Then, he remembered Danny. What had Wyler said? He quickly went downstairs the three floors that went to his office. Sam and Vivian were still outside Jack's office with a worried looks on their faces. He headed toward them and he was going to enter his boss' office when Vivian stopped him. "He won't let you in. Are you going to explain to us what's going on?"

Martin stared at them. "Viv...now…I can't right now."

"You know something," Sam said. "What's going on with Danny? Is he sick or something? Has he been fired?"

"Okay. Yes, I know something, that's obvious. But no, Danny is fine, he's not sick and he hasn't been fired. It's…it's difficult to explain but it's something good, actually it is. But now, please, let us do our job."

"Your job… great," Vivian was really upset.

"Viv, I understand you, I shouldn't be involved in this matter, but I didn't have an option. Please, trust me. Please," he insisted.

He didn't want to give more explanations so he opened Jack's office, went into it and closed it throwing a last pleading look toward Vivian.

Sam and Vivian exchanged a worried look. "It's something good…" Sam murmured. "And, why it doesn't look like that?"

…..

"Well," Wyler said looking at the time once again. "It seems that Jack Malone is getting late, so, although it wasn't the idea, I'll explain the situation to you. I think it helps that we're friends." Wyler stared at them carefully.

"To start, I have to tell you the agreement we've reached, so George Gordon gives you the absolute control over the documents about your biological family. The agreement also implies that what you read in the documents won't be known by people other than us, including Jack Malone and Victor Fitzgerald, even though it's been difficult to convince."

"Why?" Will asked frowning.

"He wanted to kill your father with his own hands," Wyler smiled. "Well, that's the deal."

"I haven't made any deal with him," Will said. Sarah put a hand over her brother's arm. "Will, these people have worked hard to make this happen today. That's what you wanted, to meet your family, to come back home."

Will looked at her and didn't say a word. He knew that Sarah was right, but his vengeful wishes were deep.

Wyler understood Will's feelings. "Actually, we're not trying to save your father, but the Caroline Foundation, which is headed by your brother Matt, by the way. You agree with me the work they do is very important and the donations they receive make it possible. Your father, Will, how do I tell you, the fact you can take all of this, that's punishment enough for him, do you understand me?"

Will nodded.

"Well, all the documents are there. In these boxes you see, there are reports, photographs, and some personal effects. The folder over the boxes contains a report about everything and the story of what happened to your biological family since your adoption…actually, before that."

"And when does it finish?" Sarah asked.

"It finishes with your definitive adoption," Wyler paused, that would be difficult to say, but they had to know, "and the Gordons' renunciation to adopt your little brother."

"What?" Sarah exclaimed as her eyes went into tears. "How the hell did they do that?"

"Did my mother sign that?" Will asked. It wasn't a surprise coming from his father but his mother was totally out of his understanding.

"She had to. They were scared…it's…human."

"Human? Scared of what?" Will almost yelled.

"I guess it supposed to introduce in your, sorry, lovely family, think they also had your brother Matt…"

"Is he adopted too?" Will asked ironically. Matt was a copy of her mother.

"No, obviously not. Your brothers came from a very bad family, abused, drunk father, your older brother had been in jail, because of some drugs issues…your parents didn't want to introduce that into your lives."

"He was my brother, my little brother. How old was he? I was fifteen when I was definitively adopted. He was eleven, that's Victoria's age. A kid. There's not explanation for it," Will said. "What happened to Rafi?"

Sarah frightened. "I see you have a good memory," Wyler smiled. "I'm sorry. Rafi died two years ago. In fact, he was the one who has brought us here. The drugs, the alcohol, and the hot head of your older brother made him get sick. His liver didn't resist anymore and the doctors were trying a transplant, from any sibling. His brother passed the medical tests but he wasn't in good condition either. So then, Rafi told your brother about you both."

"Didn't he know?" Will asked surprised.

"No, nobody mentioned what had happened anymore, at the point that Rafi wasn't sure of his memories either. At least, that was what I was told."

"What are we going to find in these documents, Mr. Wyler?" Will asked.

"Well, that's what I wanted to explain. The documents are yours, nobody is going to take them. You can read them whenever you want, but I advise you not doing it alone. But, if you prefer, I can explain to you what this is about."

Will shook his head. "I don't know…" he stood up and approaching to the boxes, took the folder. "Operation Kangaroo," he read. "File number nine: Alvarez. Alvarez," he repeated thoughtfully.

Sitting down beside his sister, with trembling hands, he opened the cover and started reading. After a moment, Wyler stood carefully and left the room.

….

In Jack's office, Wyler observed Jack and Martin talking to Danny. Back to him, he wasn't able to see him, but Jack's facial expression told him a lot. He shook his head. How the hell could he leave him alone at that moment? Danny had confronted the fact his mother had tried to abandon him in exchange of his brothers and he had to confront the Gordons' renunciation, plus remembering some facts of his childhood nobody would want to remember, and surely, have answers to the questions his brother and sister would ask. Wyler had read Danny's file once he gave it back and he was aware that Jack also knew that file. And still he thought that Danny wouldn't need some time to assimilate it. Fool Jack.

With a grimace, he opened the door without bothering to knock. "Leave us alone," he ordered.

"What's going on?" Martin asked.

"Nothing, what should be happening?" Wyler replied.

Martin understood the inappropriateness of the question, but he couldn't help it. He was worried. As he left, Wyler whispered. "They are reading the documents. Together. The same thing Danny should be doing."

Martin nodded. "He had a breakdown, he didn't expect it."

"It shouldn't have happened, Jack," Wyler said.

"If he hadn't bumped into me when I was leaving, we wouldn't be here now," Jack explained upset.

"What has he told you?"

"Nothing at all, he doesn't understand why we're doing this to him," Jack replied. "But at least, he's calmer."

"Of course, I'll talk to him," Wyler said.

With that, he closed the door and sat in front of Danny.

Danny didn't say a word, didn't even look at him. He only took the glass and drank some water. On his face were, the rest of the tears, the bags under his eyes, and the empty expression, as much as his soul. Wyler felt sorry for him, but it wouldn't be the last thing he'd express.

"I've memorized the content of that folder and the boxes. And it's not easy to assimilate what I've seen there, especially for you. I told you once and I'm telling you now."

"What are you doing here?" Wyler noticed the snub in his voice.

"I'm trying to do my job. The one Jack had to do, by the way. But you've learned to hide your feelings and some aspects of your life so you're paying for it now." Wyler replied without getting upset.

"I gave you back that folder and I told you that I didn't want to know anything else." Danny stared at him and waited for an answer.

"What are you afraid of? Don't lie to me; you know I don't like to waste my time." Wyler asked then.

"I can't…I can't confront that again," Danny admitted, after a while. He wasn't able to avoid Wyler's intense look. He knew he didn't have an option with him.

"Confront? Who said you should confront anything? Are you crying here more than an hour for something that won't happen? If you had agreed to come with me instead of jumping to wrong conclusions, we wouldn't be here. And if Jack would have done his job, either, but that's done."

"You don't understand, Wyler. You can know my family's life like yours, but you don't understand. If I…if I…" Danny wasn't able to continue, the emotions taking him again, but he wouldn't lose control again. "Please…" he whispered as the air was sucked from his lungs.

"I think I understand you well, Danny. You're being so hard on yourself, and it doesn't seem it's new, is it? You are free to cry all you want and you can drink the whiskey Jack has in his drawer, but there's no way to get a solution. It will happen again unexpectedly. Something that reminds you of something, a case…not only this, not only what's happening today. You have to confront it; you don't need to confront anybody else but you. Knowing what happened and understanding it will help you to put every fact in its place and will give you a very real idea of your implication in it, that it is nothing."

Danny simply shook his head. Wyler was asking an impossible and he didn't understand why he had to do it.

"You can ask me whatever you want, but I won't leave if you don't come with me."

"Why are you doing this to me? Why did you continue with the investigation?"

"Because someone is waiting for an answer and his demand led me to you."

"What?" Danny looked tired, on the edge of a new breakdown. Wyler expected he understood the meaning of that sentence, even though not so fast.

"And to tell him the answer he's waiting for, you can't appear thinking that everything is your fault. I won't let you do it that way. Never."

Danny remained quiet, rested his back on the seat and closed his eyes. He wished not being there and tried to visualize someplace else. The soft murmur of the sea, his feet under the warm sand, the sun toasting his skin, his brother flying the kite while his mother tried to keep the straw hat on her head, and his father managed the beach umbrella. Why those memories he had skipped for a long time in his life came back right now? Why the documents Wyler talked about didn't say anything about those moments? Then Danny understood that he couldn't let the people at the other side of that story, only have the darkest moments of the last years in the life of his parents. He had done it with Sylvia; he could do it once again. Only once. Still, he was scared.

"Why are we here?" He asked opening his eyes. "I mean, here, in this office, in the FBI building. Why did you bring your story here?"

"I didn't. Jack asked for help when he realized he wasn't able to solve the case he had in his hands. And he knew that you had talked to me," Wyler asked.

"But Jack doesn't work this sort of cases." Danny objected.

"But he identified some aspects of the request with a personal matter you were trying to investigate and only got to be suspended. That was enough for Jack to take interest."

"He didn't tell me."

"He wasn't sure, then. He should have talked to you before this meeting. I don't know why he didn't."

Danny smiled and it was the first time he did since he had entered Jack's office. "I wouldn't be here."

"You're honest. Aren't you curious?" Wyler asked smiling back.

"I don't know."

"Do you want me to tell you the story?" Wyler was serious now. "You can see the documents later if you want. I won't lie to you."

Danny looked at him, unsure, looking back as if searching for someone.

"There's nobody here, Danny. It's only you and me. Forget what's outside this office. I can tell you what I know; you can ask all the questions you need. I have all the time in the world for you."

"What if I say no?"

"In my opinion, you have a lot to lose if you do, but that's your decision."

"Today?"

"Of course. Are you coming with me?"

….

Will and Sarah had revised all the documents in the folder, reading carefully some parts that took their attention. The fact their mother pretended changing the baby for them had impressed them a lot, but everything they read from then, was based on the protection Sonia Alvarez extended over her two sons, protecting them over and over from her husband, who instead of trying to improve his behavior so Guillermo and Sonia would be back, he became a so much violent man. There weren't references to them, except the questions Sonia asked to the social workers, but they only said 'they're fine, Mrs. Alvarez. Don't worry, as soon as we get a positive report, they'll be back." Then, some bad report, a visit to emergency rooms, a bleeding hand by a cut with a beer bottle, ruined any hope.

They could also read some reports about the criminal behavior of Rafael and alert about the future of the little one, who they thought moved away from his parents definitively. Sonia promised that she would take care of him and wouldn't let her husband hit him anymore.

Will felt devastated reading those stories and glanced at the boxes they hadn't yet opened. He remembered Wyler's words, but he wanted to see a photograph of his mother, who he remembered, her beautiful green eyes, that Sarah had inherited. Standing up, he approached them, without hearing the warning Sarah had told. Looking in on of them, he finally got one acceptable picture. "You both look alike," he said showing the picture to Sarah.

Sarah nodded. She was in tears. Will sat down beside her and put his arm around her. "Sarah… I'm so sorry about this. I…I never imagined that things were going to end up like this. I only wanted to come back. But now…We only have little Danny and we don't even know who he is, what he does, where he lives, if he has a family, if he's happy, if…I only want to hug my brother. I don't care about the past anymore."

"But he didn't come," Sarah said. "You heard what Wyler said."

"I don't know, maybe he came. I think that something happened on his way. Let's ask Martin, he should know," Will encouraged her, closing the folder.

Putting his mother's picture in the pocket, he headed to the door and opened it. Outside there was nobody, but leaving that suffocating room relaxed him. He knew he was close, more than ever. Picking up his mother's picture, he looked at it again. His eyes filled with tears as the thought about the suffering years as Sonia was expecting to see her children back. The image of Ingrid, his adoptive mother, changed its meaning, completely, at the moment, and even if it could be unfair, Will was aware that he would never forgive the fact they had abandoned his brother.

Martin and Jack were explaining what was going on between Danny and Wyler to Sam and Vivian, who were very angry, but also worried, wanted to know what had happened to Danny. Jack, had finally ended with a "This is a personal matter for Danny. Martin and I were involved indirectly, that's all. He didn't ask for help, you know how much Danny cares about his privacy."

Now, the only thing they could do was observe from their desk, waiting as the door was opened any moment. Martin almost jumped when his cell phone started ringing. He looked the caller ID and felt a knot in his throat. Sarah.

"Sarah?" he said aloud, looking for Jack's attention. "Yes, eh…I don't know if it's a good moment for…"

"It's the right moment. Then, are you here, somewhere?" Sarah insisted.

Martin didn't know what to say, looked at Jack in search of help but he didn't understand what Martin was trying to say. "Martin, come on, you didn't make us come here for this. Tell me right now where he is."

Her demanding tone surprised Martin, who wasn't used to that attitude Sarah usually adopted in Court. "All right," he replied, understanding that Sarah was totally right. "He's in Jack's office. With Wyler."

He didn't get a reply, but a few moments later, he saw her, followed by Will. She stopped in front of the door, but he opened it without knocking and went into Jack's. Danny and Wyler stood up immediately, surprised. Sarah stifled an exclamation of surprise, but Will approached his brother and rested his hands on Danny's arms, looked at him in his eyes and smiled. "Finally," he said. And hugging him, he whispered, "I've been waiting for this moment since I was four." Looking at him carefully he nodded. "I can't believe it," he added and hugged him again.

Danny didn't know how to react. What to do? What to say? For a second he remembered that last hug Rafi had given to him at the park beside the hospital and the promise he made. "I'm sorry," he said. "I'm so sorry about everything that happened. I…I…"

Danny got a warning look from Wyler then and remembered his words some minutes before.

But Will kept his eyes on him and his hands on his arms and Danny felt overwhelmed. After the bad moment he had spent in Jack's office, he felt weak and vulnerable. "Forget it. We've been reading the reports, seeing photographs, documents…that wasn't what I wanted. Like I told Sarah, when I was little I wished to come back home but now…now I only want to hug my brother. Everything in those boxes, in that folder is the past."

"No…" Danny started.

"Danny," Sarah cut him off. "Danny…this is unbelievable," she added hugging her brother.

"I don't…I don't know what to say… " Danny started awkwardly. "I…I'm sorry, I'm sorry. Rafi…"

"Danny, it's me who has spent all my life looking for you. I'm the one who remembered. I know they didn't tell you and we've read some horrible things. But don't be sorry, please, this is the best thing that could have happened," Will said. His wet eyes passed on Sarah, not less Danny.

"But listen," Will continued after a paused. "All of this is the past, unnecessary. We're going to build our family from now and we'll do it together. We won't be separated anymore, I don't care who or how you are, who or how I am, or Sarah whom I've been separated from for so long because of this. We won't fight this anymore. Now were going to celebrate."

He hugged his brother again and nobody was sure if he did it simply to control the tears. Danny, who was still confused and incredulous, finally gave up the evidence and hid his face in his older brother's chest.

Sarah put her hands on her face, still surprised by the identity of her little brother, by the simple truth that what Will had always been fighting, was actually true. She couldn't help but think about Matt, how he would feel the only biological son of George Gordon?

Approaching them, she rubbed their backs, trying to get their attention. "Come on guys, let me join you." Will caringly messed up her hair, like they did when they were children, and she protested the same she did then. "We better get out of here," he added.

Wyler raised an eyebrow. Things were going much better than the story he was going to tell Danny. Yes, surely it was the best happened in that moment. Definitely, Will, who apparently was the more vulnerable, had begun to play the strong older brother, and looking ahead with determination.

Wyler left Jack's office and shook his hand. He continued walking to the elevator and outside the building. Once in the Federal Plaza, the cold air welcomed him, and remembering the hot coffee of the café they had worked on that meeting, he walked through the streets, entered and walked to the table he usually occupied, but he found it was being used by two young people talking animatedly. Maybe it was a premonition. Changing to the table by the counter, he asked, however, for his usual coffee.

**Miami, Christmas time, 2006**

"I've never spent a Christmas time so differently," Martin commented, walking lazily through the beach, rounding his fiancée's waist. Sarah smiled. Before them, her son Timmy and her three cousins were running, playing with the sand. Victoria had become a protective cousin for little Natalie, as Nicky showed some seashells to Timmy and explained to him what each one were.

Diane talked animatedly with Sylvia, while Danny and Will walked shortly ahead. Martin realized that Danny didn't use the cane anymore and the limp was barely noticeable. Luckily, the surgery he was going to get two months later, would gave him back his autonomy and the agility, and with it, his job.

Will was looking at something that Danny was pointing at far away. Sylvia, walking beside Diane explained to them "That's the pier Rafi took Danny to fish when they were children." Danny never told them what happened next, even though Martin remembered at that second.

The smile of the two brothers, the admiration Sarah felt at that moment for them, for the amazing way they had connected in that short time, made him stay silent, even if a sad prick took his heart.

Danny would always be Danny.

END

Note: I'm very grateful to Wildlightning, who revised and corrected the grammar and improved the vocabulary to make this story being published. Thanks so much.


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